


Danno's Back Up Plan

by dannycantgetitright



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010), The Back-up Plan (2010)
Genre: AU BACK UP PLAN, Alternate Universe, Angst, Babies, Dysfunctional Family, F/M, Family, Family Angst, IN VITRO FIC, Idiots in Love, M/M, New York, Serious Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-06
Updated: 2014-11-02
Packaged: 2018-02-16 08:20:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 60,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2262591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dannycantgetitright/pseuds/dannycantgetitright
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daniel Williams is by far the worse in relationships. He's awful at them. Can't keep a good relationship intact for the life of him. It's not a slight relationship problem, or a tiny commitment issue. The proof for that? Fourteen so called 'relationships', and each one could probably give hefty anecdotal evidence of just how badly each of them was. But that's cutting a little brutal. Danny has to admit that there was some good in some of those relationships. </p><p>Emphasis on some.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Past, Present and Prospects of a Future

**Author's Note:**

> Heyyyy I'm back.  
> Honestly this fic needs to be done. soon. hopefully. I will finish this fic! or I will chop off my hands so I will never write or type again and then leave it unfinished for a year or two.
> 
> Forgive me please! I'm so sorry for those who read this fic and felt crushed when I didn't update it for so long. GOMEN!!!! I've updated this one so its a lot better/more clearer to understand...? *fingers crossed in hope* 
> 
> I made the plot a lot more to my liking and fixed up a lot of mistakes and I'm worried that that there still are so im still open to betas and stuff just comment or inbox me.
> 
> So here it goes. The new and improved Danno's Back Up Plan!
> 
> Also like to point out that this chapter is just a mass of time frames that are all squished into one

Daniel Williams is by far the worse in relationships. He's awful at them. Can't keep a good relationship intact for the life of him. It's not a slight relationship problem, or a tiny commitment issue. The proof for that? Fourteen so called 'relationships.' Each one could give hefty anecdotal evidence of just how badly each of them was. But that's cutting a little brutal. Danny has to admit that there was some good in some of those relationships.

Emphasis on some.

Like Nick. Danny thought he was an okay guy. A spitfire kind of guy, too. Just... it had ended with an actual fire, (sans spit) and he had to replace his grill because Danny dumped him while cooking burgers. It was a tragedy on all accounts. Except for Nick. He loved it since it was then that Danny found out that he was an actual pyromaniac. 

Or Vidam. Hot Russian guy. No problems Just got drafted to war far too often. It was his own fault, saying he could wait for him, when really he couldn't take every year with him being gone. Ended with him crying, drunk as nails on his lawn, saying he'd give up his duty for him.

Or even Gerald. Or, well, Gerladine now. He went through a sex change, whilst keeping it from Danny. It was strange since Danny should have known that a person suddenly doesn't abstain sex for a month, or make attempts at conversion by making Danny accidentally look at lesbian porn. Lots of distrust and Danny kindly saying he just wasn't interested in dating a woman. Ended really badly that relationship. 

But Danny isn't going to focus on those relationships. He really shouldn't. They're in the past and its not at all going to affect Danny's own psyche that he can't keep a person interested, or he himself interested in a relationship for his life. Nope. He'll bury it along with other bad thoughts like 'hes going to die alone' or 'never have a valentines that doesn't change that next year' or 'his tombstone will just be his bare name.' He doesn't think of any of them. You’d think that Danny could easily find the one, settle down, have kids. He seems like the guy enough. But no. It just didn't happen. He didn't get a happily-ever-after like all those fake romantic comedies the media loves to shove down your throat. It just never happened that way. But Danny Williams is above being bitter, in fact he is happy with just the ways things are.

Danny would in fact would like that. All that baby stuff, and innocent affection from someone he cared about. It’d also be nice to wake up with someone who who stays with him longer than the range of 24-hours to a little under 8 months. Danny would stick with it the whole nine freaking imaginary yards. But sadly for Danny, he’s never found that, ever. He scoffs at the idea of not being able to be loved - though he does believe its true . All his relationships are proof of that, they just never clicked, only the sex kept him going at it. He tried his hardest, so fucking hard to keep on it, but he knew it wasn’t fair to him or the other person. So in the end he decided to leave love behind and focus on his career more.

So overall Danny is a grown man, and he accepts the fact that life’s not always happy endings, finding true love and all that other happy go lucky bullshit. Sometimes you just got to let things happen; do things that you know you have control over, not the things that you can’t.

—————————————19 years ago.————————————-

“Do you think you’d want kids?” Rachel pops this question randomly.

“I don’t know.” Danny says simply, because he really doesn't know. Or he's just too lazy to actually come up with an answer.

They're in Rachel’s room, which is a large square room, which on the right teeters off on both edges into a nice little bay window with too many satiny white cotton pillows on top. They're accessories of varying sizes and colours ranging from pink, light pink and dark pink. The left wall of the room is where her giant king sized bed, that’s wider then it is longer, is located. Her computer is right next to the window side, and it’s pretty cool if all you want to do is play pinball on it or reply to emails. Danny isn't really into it.

Rachel herself is on her satiny, over cushioned bed, more so than the bay window. She's looking at the ceiling, her face in thought while she bites her lips. And Danny is on the floor, fiddling with his shirt. Rachel and Danny have been friends for over 10 years now. He remembers how he met Rachel on the playground, even at the age of 6 Rachel had such an annoying posh accent. He remembers fighting for a yellow shovel, Danny being pushed, getting sand in places sand should never be and being called a blonde ninny. After that, it had been the start of a beautiful - albeit rocky - friendship.

“Well I wouldn’t want one; I have enough family to deal with here.” Rachel says absently. “You know my relatives are coming here soon? They’ll be here by the dozens. So yeah I wouldn't want kids, have to take care of all them first.”

“It's nice that you got family.” Danny says with a slight lump in his throat. He'd been dreading telling her this. But he had to. He fucking had to. It all just suddenly happened, he never saw it coming. He remembers his father's look of anguish, and the mirroring looks from his other siblings.

Rachel quirks her brows in confusion. “What do you mean? What about your Dad, Mom, Matty or Donna? Your relatives? They ringing any bells to you?” She ends the sentence with a click of her tongue, almost like scolding.

He said quietly, “that’s what I came here to talk about, Rach.”

Rachel lifted her head off of the pillow. She quirked her eyebrows again. She stood up from her spot on the bed, and sat next to her friend, obviously feeling the distress from his words.

“What do you mean?” She asked.

“People found out, Rach. Gordy told everyone about me. His father beat him or I think he did, because he had these bruises on him, and I-and." He cursed himself for breaking his sentence. "I wanted to comfort him about it, and he just pushed me away. I think it was too much for him all of a sudden because he just got mad, at me, or at himself, or his dad- or whatever.” He breathed thoroughly, he was talking too much. He needed to calm down. "He called me a fucking faggot that should leave him alone, and threw me down on the school floor. Everyone saw, heard too."

"Jesus, Danny." She didn't touch Danny, knew too well that he didn't like contact when he was too emotional. "Did he pay for it? Like, did you also tell everyone about him? " Classic Rachel, always a tit for tat kind of person. He felt her ire from her very distant presence.

Danny gives a snort to that. “What do you think.” His reply was to a rhetorical question.

“Oh god Danny. That's just- that's just awful"

Danny didn't reply to that.

“Danny it's okay, you can tell me.”

“How is it going to be okay Rachel?” Danny nearly yelled. He was mad. Mad just like Gordy, and it fucking hurt. He knew what Gordy was going through and that's why he accepted it. Why he accepted the word and looked at him with pained eyes. He wasn't going to tell on him. He wasn't like Gordy.

Rachel remained quiet. Letting things settle for a bit before she questioned again. “You said you came here to talk about family. Tell me that shit head didn't pull you out that far out.” Rachel said so bitterly and so wary that it seemed to make Danny become mute with his response.

"It's not like your school, Rach. Its a public school where gossip gets spread like wildfire." Rachel knew what that meant. She knew that his father was a devout conservative, that spewed plenty of hate on gays and much anything that was different from his life.

Danny was surprised by the touch on his shoulder that he didn't realize he winced at the contact. Shit. She never tried to comfort him with her touch, but Danny knew that sometimes things called for it. But this time he really wished she hadn't.

She gulped imperceptibly. She knew immediately, Danny thought. "Danny lift your shirt."

"Rach I told you that I don't want you that way." He tried to joke, but there wasn't any playfulness in it.

She pursed her lips thinly. "You bloody fucking know what I mean when I say that, Daniel." She used his last name in a sturdy, parental tone. He hated it. "Did he hit you."

“Rachel its nothing, just a few bruises from baseball practice.” He couldn't try a bold face lie, he needed a good lie.

“You haven’t played since you tore your knee 3 months ago. Daniel please tell me.” Danny always thought she had an inkling of a feeling, but now she had undeniable proof.

Danny’s sighed, not replying, but did lift his bulky polo -shirt, which hid almost all of his body. He had dark blue bruises over his sides, shoulders and a few purples ones that looked like they were new on his chest. Rachel closed her eyes at the image. She looked Danny in the eye, saw the pain, the agony in there, and lastly the horror that she had been right, but been to afraid to voice out. She tenderly touched the wounds and closed her eyes, still facing Danny.

“Did he do that to you?” Rachel said for more confirmation.

Danny responded in a curt 'yea'.

“This isn't the first time isn't it.”

“No. But the worst one,” replied Danny quickly.

Rachel shook her head slightly. “Danny you just can’t hide things from me like that! I’m your best friend, I care about you!”

“And why should I believe that? How- how can I believe in-in love and caring for someone?” Danny said meeting her eyes. “When my own family doesn't love me. How the fuck am I supposed to know anything about love and caring," he admittedly silently.

“Because I’m sitting here next to you. You always have me as a friend that will care and love you. I am your best friend, Daniel, you can't just wallow in this alone. I'm here for you,” Rachel said in a gentle tone.

“You wanna know what its all about? Fine! Wallow it all in! You opened this can of worms and now you got it.” Danny said wiping tears off his eyes, fuck he was losing it. “They fucking wanted me out of the house, Rach, threw me out like I was garbage. Danny face was wet with tears. “Matty and Donna don’t wanna see me cause I’m a fag! They don't even try to pretend like I'm there goddamn fucking brother.” He breathed out angrily, his hands shaking into fists.

“God this is all fucked up. They can't possibly mean all that.”

“They said to me", Danny paused slightly "...I'll ruin their lives when other people find out that they’re related to a queer!” Danny yelled out now. “How the fuck am I supposed to take that the wrong way?” Danny for the first time cried out in sobs, Rachel spread her arms around Daniels body and pulled him in closer. She ignored his weak protests at pushing her away, he stopped pushing and finally just accepted the damn hug.

“You’ll live with me then.” She told him when he stopped shaking so much.

“I can’t Rachel…” Danny says in between his quiet sobs.

“No. You’ll be living with me. You can't possibly live with those ignorant arseholes any longer. This is the last straw, and you need to leave. Please. Not for me, but for your own good.”

Danny heard the conviction in her voice. It was impossible to move like a mountain. She wasn't going to budge on this.

Danny, not for the first time wishing that he was attracted to her, wishing it could be that easy for him.

“Only when I graduate, and make enough for a cheap apartment.” Because Danny wants some dignity left, he wont rely too much on Rachel. He knows now from piss poor experiences that its dangerous to get too attached.

“Okay,” she nods. “Just always remember that my house is always open for you Daniel.”

“Thank you.” Danny nods and they stand in awkward silence, but they smile a little bit because he had admitted, to the truth, let it all out. And it seemed for a moment that things seemed settled.

It was a few weeks later that he would be living with the Evans for a while. All of them giving apathy towards Danny’s situation, nothing with what he felt like in his old home. Danny isn't sure if he should be grateful or mad. They had packed up all of his thing, taking just a few hours. Danny’s parents were not even glancing towards him or be bothered to wonder why he was moving with the Evans. His brother's and sister's, not even saying a proper goodbye. It was as if he didn't really exist, to them, at least. It didn't matter that others thought he existed, his family meant more to him.

The sad thing is, this place was never a home to begin with, not since he was little. He'd hoped it would have went better, had hoped they'd accept when he came out. It didn't turn out like what he wanted, and deep down he knew for a long time that there was little love for him in this home.

It felt strange leaving a place that was, for all intents and purposes meant to be his true hearth, but was actually just a hollow illusion for him, a plasticity that his parents draped like a veil to make them seem normal to the rest of society. But in truth they were a fucked up family. A family that cared for money more than family gatherings, or spent more times yelling than laughing, or let go of one another simply because they didn't fit to their ideals.

The moment that Danny tried to tear off the veil, they let go of Danny. Cut him off like a puppet string. Danny knew he'd never return, because he'd never accept being the puppet for them.

Once he had settled down in his new room, he stood by the bed, just sat there all alone, contemplating. It wasn't the first time that happened, and surely it wouldn't be the last. He thought, not for the first time either, 'I was a cut off string that was never going to be reattached, but so badly wanted to.'

—————————————-18 years ago——————————————

17 years ago Maria Donna Williams was diagnosed with lung cancer, Danny tried to see her, but he was declined visitation rights to her room. He cried after that.

A month after that Danny tried to visit her again on her birthday, he was disavowed his visitation rights. He drank himself to sleep, tears drying on his cheek.

5 months after that Danny tried again. He was banned from the hospital, when he refused their orders, and wanted to see her mother. He was forced out, yelling to see his mother. When he saw Matty there he hoped to talk to him again.

“Matty? That you?”

Matty kept walking to the hospital doors.

“Matty it’s me, your brother.”

“I ain't your brother! Matt scoffed heatedly. ” Just please leave us alone Daniel, she doesn't want to see you.”

With that said, Matty disappeared inside the hospital.

Leaving Danny alone in more ways the one.

He simply cried that day.

16 years ago Danny’s mother died of lung cancer. Danny was never invited to the funeral.

Danny didn't cry that year.

—————————————Present Day——————————————————-

In the grand scheme of things, Danny was living his life as best he could without someone to guide his metaphorical helpless hand. He didn't need that person, even though he continued trying after so many times. After a while though he lost the luster to go back in the field, to go and try to search for person that he suddenly lost interest in finding. It left him bit cynical and wary whenever he did find new prospects for a relationship with anyone. But Danny felt proud overall for not relying on someone too much. He made through with many of his many achievements without the guide or constant support from someone he loved. He had completed his own way to cooking school, when he was swiftly kicked out from the academy, and made due with what he could do with his life. From then on Danny had been a striving chef for most of his young years, and he never regretted it. It wouldn't do him any good to be spiteful for who he was. He wasn't ashamed anymore. If the academy couldn't accept this ideology of his, then good fucking bye to them.

Danny would make the best of cooking, being in a restaurant.

After a while, it became something he found plenty of joy in.

You see, Danny would never forget the moment he turned the tides of a full shift when the head chef had cut her finger in a sink, (she'd specifically told the staff not to put any sharp objects in it, but sometimes kids don't listen) and so Danny had to take over and try and get her restaurant back in order. He never felt such a thrill from cooking before in all his time. From cutting vegetables  and washing dishes to creating nice, centered entrees, or flambeing quails, which singed the hairs on his fingers, or drizzling off white chocolate sauce on a dark chocolate tart. Working neck deep in the kitchen was amazing and it amazed him how much he absorbed from working as a simple chef, and watching the executive and sous chef from a far.  Danny had a knack for cooking, but he also had a bigger knack for observing and understanding from a strangers perspective. He wondered how he hadn't realized how good he was at cooking, even more so now that he worked in an actual restaurant, and wasn't cramming his head with cook books at his old culinary school. It had only been a fail safe for Danny, cooking, something he could do to pay the bills in his crappy apartment. He never realized he could make a living out of it. He saw it for the first time, how he took over and made them survive such an impending disaster for everyone.The head chef had been forgiving for Danny that she saved them for a day, and not left her a handful of angry customers and complaints.

But she still fired Danny. He knew he crossed a line by taking over a chefs kitchen, but he didn't think he'd get fired over it. He thought he'd just get dish washing duties for a while. Not get kicked out again. Though the chef didn't actually fire Danny, he later realized that fact and had simply placed him in a better position he could get better at his craft. She quickly gave him a call to apply to restaurant that was run by a friend of hers. The place was fairly new, and the guy had been looking to hire a new sous-chef, since his old one had bailed on him. Danny applied for the job, wary, but after a while, he knew his old chef had given a good review on his work because he'd been hired almost instantly. 

After that Danny's cooking ideals skyrocketed. He was making recipes, adding new ones to menus and gaining a nice sum of money every month. But the money wasn't the only thing he gained, he gained a small bit of popularity as a chef in New York, he even had been mentioned in a couple cooking magazines on his success as one of five of New York's up and coming chefs. 

A lot of things happened in those 10 years of Danny's life, and one of those strange, but not really, was when he was normally walking past by a street corner in New York, off from his work and ready to just walk around, saw the small building complex he usually passed by when walking with Rachel, when she and him had gone shopping on summer and winter sales down the block.

It held several stories of residence, but on the left corner had an open spaced loft that had huge bay windows that had yellow velvet sun shades protruding from the wall on steel bars, where it rested above the glass. This spot was usually where he saw the blaring pineapple head on the front of the honey coloured door. But he didn't see it. It was gone.

He also didn't see the ugly blaring sign of a stone head which had 'Riki Tiki Ananas Bar' written on a surfboard it was carrying at the top of the building. He saw nothing except for an empty, huge open spaced loft. It seemed that the windows no longer had tape covered on them, and allowed him to actually look inside the place. It was a nice place, (and seemed bigger than he originally thought) even if it did belong to hellish fruit enthusiast. There'd also been a apartment upstairs, something he knew since the residence where always throwing parties at the top and bottom floors, sometimes at the same time. He never went in, hated the pineapple concoctions they made, with fervor. Almost everything was exclusively pineapples, they were known for it.  Or they had been. Danny looked at the sign that the told him it was up for sale. Huh.

He still had the money, Danny had thought. Danny didn't like to believe in signs, or foretelling the future.  He did believe that a beneficial opportunity arose for him, an idea was slowly concocting in his head, and he knew he'd accept it.

That is how Danny buys a the small building complex for his own. He moved out of his crappy apartment that he's kept since he moved to New York. He kept it more out of easy access to his job and a vague sense of sentimentality for it.  Danny didn't really need to move to a better living area, even when he had the money to afford it, its not like anyone else was gonna be living there. He could survive off a feeble and cheap rent apartment. But for this occasion, he knew that he wasn't buying this extra space for anyone else. He was buying it simply to keep the one passion that's kept him afloat financially, close to him. In many ways had acted as a catalyst to take away the feelings from being so empty. It filled him in a way, filled him with a purpose, something to do an not just idle around in his sorrow. He also didn't mind, and loved, whenever he got 'thanks' or 'praises' for his food. Loved that people enjoyed it and came back for more as regular customers, asking Danny for recipes and making idle chit chat that made him laugh. He was happy simply giving back to these people who appreciated him for his gift with food, and they returned with a nice camaraderie that only happened within the confides of the restaurant. It was just something he relished in since he'd been denied it for so long. 

It was something good for him, his restaurant now being his home a few steps away, and literally in that sense too. But even when he bought it, he waited for a few months to instigate his restaurant. He slowly worked his way out of his old job, finding a new replacement for him and taking his last paychecks from the eatery.

The first step he took to actually opening the restaurant was him moving all his stuff back into the big upper loft, which made his measly bed and small furniture seem almost pathetic, more so now that the hugeness contrasted with the tiny single bed and pull up couch. Danny then just decided to throw it them out, and just replace them with new furniture. They didn't take enough space for him now.

Once the upper part had been properly furnished with basic furniture, he had Rachel tell him that she'd help with the interior decorating the upper, as well as the lower loft, where the actual restaurant was going to be placed in. She helped make the place seem 'homey' and had innocently mocked him that she'd make him forget about that shitty apartment he'd lived in for so long, and actually make his new one spectacular. Danny was not bothered by the fact that she air quoted 'spectacular'. She left cackling and leaving Danny's decent, but unplanned impulse buy. 

Once all parts of the loft had been properly furnished. The place slowly trickled in customers, who came by not just for a place to piss and dash. It became a true restaurant once Danny had his first full house of customers. It was an a gratifying day for Danny. It made him nearly forget his crappy life outside of the restaurant and his career. It made him think that he was just fin, even if he feels empty inside when he can’t confide to a specific person about his insecurities, doubts, joys... or really anything. He'll get through that rough patch in his life. He may not have much, but he sure does have his career, his eatery, and has a few good friends. Danny feels changed in some ways for this little bliss. This way to forget. 

Rachel’s changed too. Even though she married a stickler like Stan Edwards. Who, Danny can admit, from a distance, may look like a serious killjoy of a guy, but is actually pretty okay. Danny may have been wary of the relationship in the beginning, but when he saw Rachel looking at Stan when they were taking a hiking trial. When Danny had been looking at the vast forest, he had glanced back to see that the idiots looking at one another when one of them took a look to the mountain range, it was incredibly dorky of them to do, but it seemed right. 

It didn't take long that they tied the knot in a massive white wedding on January.

After that two kids came about a few years later in their marriage. They now have two kids, Ben and Sarah who are 4 and 6 yrs. old, and Danny is their favorite uncle. Beating out all of Stan’s and Rachel’s brothers and cousins, which is a quite a lot actually. He feels very humbled for that fact. 

Everything been so different, his life has fluxed from worse to good to decent in the so far upcoming years. Its been a long time that they've had deep conversations like this, the ones where the sit on the couch, watching horror films or action film, just talking like they had been back in their high school days. So it comes by a total surprise that Rachel subtlety brings up the conversation of kids when their 35. And by subtlety Rachel just blurts out: “Let’s have a baby.”

Danny was on the couch, downing himself a bottle of his special whiskey, (that he does not in fact keep stored for when he’s extra broody.) while they watch some glorified action movie. He did not under any circumstances choke, and scream like a little girl when he heard her suggestion.

3 minutes pass by while Rachel tries to soothe Danny from asphyxiation via inhaling the gin.

“What the hell, Rach!” Danny yelled at her, his eyes bulging out at the statement and not the whiskey in his lungs. “Drop a bomb why don’t ya.” His voice sounded too hoarse to speak properly.

“Well honestly it was just a suggestion,” Rachel said, patting his back. “I mean you do want kids don’t you?” Rachel raised her eyebrows at him, and Danny slightly nodded, wondering if that was the right response. “Good. Plus I know a lot of great single Dads and just because you haven’t found… well whoever the hell you’re looking for doesn't mean you can’t have a kid. I mean partners are kind of overrated I guess. But kids. Kids are great. ”

“I think,” Danny says once the burning sensation subsides from his lungs, and he could properly talk and say: “that you are insane... and fully certifiable!” He finishes in a near shout. He raises his arms, making unintelligible hand signs, something he knows that Rachel hates.  She gives him a blank stare, but Danny wants to go further on his rant about ‘how crazy and delusional his best friend is.’ “Having a kid is not like a puppy okay, Rach. You need to feed it, burp it, wake up at goddamn who knows when; to change its diaper, coddle it and not to mention the amount of mone-”

Rachel stopped him with a mouth clapped to his mouth. “Daniel, in the 28 something years I’ve known you, you have never been in a single stable relationship that’s lasted more than 5 months; that also hasn't centered around sex.”

Danny was about to object, because no matter how true that statement may be (actually it may be a little over 7 months but he feels like that's not important) it's still rude to voice out loud, but Rachel eyed him with a glare that could kill a man. specifically him, so he promptly shut up.

“Whatever.” Rachel says with a wave of her hand. “Drowning yourself in your work and alcohol is not a proper form of moping. I'm honestly being sincere here and you should just hear me out.”

“I don’t mope.” Danny says, ignoring her other words. 

“Yes, yes you do.”

Danny grunted in comment.

“You don’t have to say yes, but I just want you to think about it."  

I know that it may seem strange of me to ask you this, but I feel like you've always been a family man, you want a baby, you want your own little person to cherish and love. I know that it makes me sound bonkers for suggesting it, but you don’t have much time and you really want to waste your life looking for someone? I know you want to have a child, Daniel. You don’t think I see the way you look at the mothers and fathers with their own children, it’s really depressing, not to mention creepy.” Her expression is that of sympathy, bordering on pity. 

Danny doesn’t know which one to rant about first, his face like it was loading a screen trying to respond, but instead he lets it die out, and says, “what if I don’t turn out to be a good parent? What if I-”.

“You’re not going to turn into your parents,” Rachel interrupts him. “You’re nothing like them. Well in the things that actually matter." Rachel says rubbing Danny’s good knee. “You are a deeply compassionate person. You've got so much life has to offer you. So stop wasting time and just move on to the next step in life. You've said so yourself that you've stopped dating altogether, you shouldn't focus on that part of your life too much."

“Compassionate?” Danny says, deadpan.

Rachel rolls her eyes. “I wish that wasn't the only thing you pick up from my words."

Danny shook his head. "No. No. I got all that. I know my age, Rach. I'm 35 and I haven't even had much to call a boyfriend. But is it that easy to just move on. Just to forget it and never get hitched." 

"Just because you'll be a dad doesn't mean you can't get married."

"No but it'll make things harder for me already." Danny said, his thoughts turning to the worst conclusions. "What if they ask me why I don't have anyone. Why they don't have another dad." 

"So what?" Her expression almost defiant. "You'll be a great single dad. You wan't a kid so badly that you decided to screw societal norms and just decided to get a kid and forgo all that marriage crap. Fuck it's lame anyways. You'd end up like old squares like me Stan anyways." Even when Rachel had said it, the parts about marriage, Danny knew she never had true conviction for those words. He knew she loved it. She was goading him. 

He sighed. "You don't mean that, Rach." 

"I meant what I said about you being a good parent. You’ll be a great dad,” Rachel says getting back to the point “I’ve seen you with Ben and Sarah, you’re amazing at it. Plus the doctors say that I’m well for another pregnancy. Stan and me are good with the amount of kids we have. We're gonna wait for a few more years before trying again." 

Danny bit his lip, deep in thought. He finally let himself succumb to the crazy idea, on the notion to just entertain her, Danny weakly thought.“Okay so how does this work? Do we like…”

“In vitro fertilization.” Rachel announces, answering Danny that left him even more confused.

“In Vito-what?”

“Well Daniel they're is this thing called ‘in vitro fertilization' she said with exaggerated air quotes. “It’s where the doctor sticks a needle filled with your sperm, and fertilizes it with an egg-donor and they place it in my vagina so I can inc-”

Danny looked quite disturbed. “Needles and vagina’s; great mental picture.” 

“What? You'd think we’d have it the conventional way? Which I wouldn’t object to if I wasn't married woman, or if it wasn’t so awkward doing it with my best friend, who is also is five types of gay." She said, listing them off one by one. 

“That's an exaggeration. You can't be a type of gay. You're just gay." And after educating Rachel again on human decency, Danny cooed an: "Awwww thanks, Rach. I wouldn't have sex with you either.”

“Okay we’re past that point. So…”Rachel prodded, her knee padding against Danny's.

“You said to let me think about it. Now I’m thinking.”

“Well this is a big decision, Daniel. I'll understand any decision you make once you think about it for a while. Really think about it. Alright?" 

“I don’t have to make it now, do I?” Danny ask, because this is just too much for one night. He needs some time to think about it.

“Only when you’re one hundred percent sure.” 

Danny nods, and resumes watching the movie. Taking another swig of his glass which still held a spoonful of whiskey left. His head was swirling with too many thoughts. His mind not totally with him, barely registering what the movie was saying.This is totally what Rachel would do, get an idea in his head, and never let him forget about it. She loves to let the idea in his head grow and grow until it actually does come to fruition. 

When Rachel finally leaves at late at midnight, leaving Danny and saying quick goodbyes.

Danny gets rid of the taste of whiskey and he assembles himself for bed. The bed rests easy on his back as he reclines, his mind in thought, still replaying all of what Rachel’s said tonight, what it meant. He doesn't get much sleep with his loud obnoxious thoughts bombarding his brain. It was such a huge decision for Rachel, and for him too. It wasn't going to be easy.  

And Danny is lonely, there’s no denying that. But Danny doesn't think that loneliness is a reason to just have a kid. Danny’s thinking about what it would mean bringing a baby into his world, to his lonely island. Is that reason enough, to prove his parental right? But Danny knows he's felt a tug inside him, a deep painful tug in his chest, that happens whenever someone talks about their beloved family members or troublesome toddlers. It's the truth, the painful truth of how deep down he wants that. Wants to have a family. He's so screwed up by his own, from all the emotional, mental and physical abuse from them, the whole fucking damn trifecta of abuse, that he aches for a what it'd be like to have an actual family. A family that won't abandon him. A proper family.

He's knows he's got Rachel, Stan and a few good friends, they're all great family. But he knows that they've all got their own lives, Danny cant always be a part of it. 

Danny knows he's nothing like his parents. He went through too much shit with them to become troubled, spiteful person- to be like them. He knew if he acted like that, they would have won in a way. They would have made Danny bitter for who he was and make him regret every choice he made. He was never going to be anything like them, he was never going to do anything they did, learned from them how to never treat a child. In a twisted sense, they helped Danny grow. Grow to be the opposite of what they were. 

He would make his best way to educate his kid, to make sure they had a bright future a head of themselves. 

He would never abandon his kid, and that is a promise Danny will take with his grave. 

He'd love the kid. With all his might, with his whole goddamn broken heart. He'd do his damn best to. 

Rachel also has a point about Danny’s age. He isn't getting any younger, and when he’s old and senile, with no partner, how lonely would he be. How much he'd regret never having kids for posterity’s sake. Or to share and have special moments with, like Prom, graduation. Or to complete the duty of the dad who scares off all potential partners for his kids who'll be too young for a relationship. He shudders at thinking what high school would be like. Danny has accepted that he is alone, but a kid shouldn't be treated as a solution. A kid is in fact a problem. A problem that requires a handful of equations, steps and strong mental to finish to get the right answer. A kid is work. Every night a challenge to sleep, either with the feeling of tiredness or worry to add. A kid, a family, is something that he can have. Danny wants his own family, he doesn’t need a partner, and he certainly doesn't need a husband. He can do this just fine on his own. He’s not missing this chance for a person who might not even exist for Danny. 

All the worry washes away. He feels good at having thought out most of his decisions, most of whats he thinks will or wont happen. And even then, if something unexpected were to happen, Danny would just be fine with it. He can have his family any way he wants.

As long as it is his to hold near to his aching heart. 

So Danny makes his decision the day after tomorrow.

——————————————————————————————————————-

He goes to Rachel’s house after he closes down William’s. He knocks 3 or maybe 7 times, he’s excited, okay.

“I would be honored to carry your baby.” Rachel says opening the door for Danny, she moves to the sides and allows him through.

“How do you know I was coming here for that? I could be here to tell you no.”

“But you won’t.”

“Then if we could restart this, I want to do this properly.” Danny says as Rachel closes the door to her house. Danny flattens his tie and clears his throat. “Rachel Edwards, would you do me the favour, the honour, actually, to carry my baby to term.”

Rachel shakes her head in amusement. “But of course, Daniel.” She says in a funny accent. "I'd be happy to," she finishes with a toothy grin. 

They both burst out laughing, and Rachel brings out the champagne to celebrate.

“Stan and the kids are okay with this?” Danny asks, because he’s got to know if this will affect Rachel’s family at all. But he knows Rachel. She goes through every decision with Stan, well the important ones, with Stan. The kids too. She always tells them whats happening in his life anyways, might as well tell them this. 

“They’re fine with it. Sarah and Benny are excited for you and Stan is okay as long as the baby isn't mine. We can use a donors egg. They all want you to be happy Daniel, and I know all too well on how children impact your future, so I know you will be fine. You’ll love them and cherish them. It'll be the best-worst choice of your life.”

"Best-worst choice of my life?"

"Absolutely. A fitting word for the decision." 

"This was your idea." 

"I'm just the enabler to someone who already wanted it to begin with." 

Danny nods, his smile beaming from his lips along with Rachel’s own smile. It might be the first genuine smile he’s ever given out.

They both start planning for Danny’s future.

——————————2 Months Later—————————————————-

Danny drives to the clinic is in his shitty, old Saturn that hes had ever since moving to New York. He'd be damned if he ever became a full fledged New Yorker that never learned how to drive for himself. Once he got into the lobby, he was put into the waiting room. Which, incidentally caused Rachel to emphatically emphasize the point that the she needed Danny to be present in the room when the insertion happened. After 20 mins of harsh glares and whispered threats about suing the place; Danny had gotten permission to be ushered into the room with Rachel, who is now on a recliner bed, her feet propped out on stilts, looking calm like she isn't sticking her vagina out. 

Danny is sweating with nervousness. He and Rachel had spent months and days looking for egg donors and trying to find the best gynecologist for them. Danny doesn’t really care much about the heritage of the donor. All that matters to Danny is if the child is healthy. 

Danny can’t seem to sit still. The doctor said he’d be here in 10 minutes but its taken forever for him to come by. He glanced at his clock which tells him only 6 minutes have passed, but Danny slowly suspects that his watch is just going slow and that he isn't impatient. 

“Geeze, this stuff looks like it came from the morgue.” Danny says taking an object that looks like a blunt knife with a needle end on it, out of a silver plate filled with a bunch of other weird stuff that looks like they’re meant for medieval torture instead of medical aid.

“Danny, stop touching the doctors stuff,” Rachel chides lightly.

“I usually don’t have people in the room when this happens, but I guess I can overrule it. You being the father of all this.” A voice says behind them.

Danny drops the strange looking apparatus back on the silver looking plate, making a small clanging noise.

“Be careful with that stuff," an asian man in a white lab coat says.  

Danny looks sheepish. “So…?"

“Doctor, Doctor Kelly.” The man says.

“… Right, Doctor." It suddenly feels strange to be in the room now with a third person in the mix. "Umm...will the process- is it going to happen now?” Danny asks, changing the subject.

“Yes. But first I'd love to give you a brief presentation." 

“Presentation?”

“Yes. I like to give all my patients presentation on the wonders of insemination and in vitro,” Dr. Kelly says with a straight up poker face.

Both Rachel and Danny raise their eyebrows in question. But when Dr. Kelly brings a projector and turns it on, displaying a screen that says ‘Miracles of the insemination process and the female genitalia.’ Danny and her both have expressions of extreme discomfort even before the thing starts playing.

—————————————————————————————-

“Would you also like to see the next presentation? It is much more interesting.”

“Nope!” Rachel shouts in protest, but begins to look embarrassed for it. “No. Of course I’d love to.” Danny hears the lying in her tone. “It’s just umm… I really need to go, so if you could just stuff me up doctor like a turkey on thanksgiving, I’d really appreciate it.”

Dr. Ho Kelly looks at her with a funny smile. “You remind me a lot of my cousin.”

“Well she must be a fun girl or guy or whatever," Rachel laughs hysterically. There's a slight difference from this laugh and her usual laugh that makes Danny realize that she is just as nervous as he is. If not more. 

“You don’t have to do this.” Danny says to Rachel seriously.

“No, I want to, Daniel. Just give me a minute to take in the fact that I’m about to enjoy the pangs of motherhood again. ”

“Want me to hold your hand?” Danny's joking, but Rachel nods and sticks out her hand for him to take. Danny, surprised, takes it willingly.

“Okay, well we should start the procedure now.” Dr. Kelly says as he puts on a pair of white gloves and brings the tray of syringes and tubes filled with the fertilized egg near him. 

The process itself is very anticlimactic. Dr. Kelly just sticks the syringe and and tada-presto Rachel's holding zygotes now.  

“Congratulations. The eggs are safely placed in the uterus,” the Doctor says. 

“I’m pregnant again,” Rachel says. Her voice a strange mix of excitement and terror. 

“I’m a dad,” Danny gulps, he feels strangely sick, but it’s slightly overpowered by the excitement he feels too. It’s like someone telling him he won the lottery, but he just has to eat a can of worms. It may be a strange analogy, but the description is all the same to him. 

“Well, not yet.” Doctor-of-ruining-precious-moments says. “After a few weeks pass by you should be getting regular symptoms of pregnancy. Moodiness, sensitivity to light, morning sickness and all the other stuff,” Dr. Kellu says as he grabs something from his desk in the back. “Remember it’ll take a few weeks for you to know for sure, but I’ll give you these pamphlets on what you should and shouldn't do while pregnant. Such as all the foods that you should not be eating and activities you should refrain from. This is just mandatory for me to do, I know you've had experience with this before." The doctor says when he glimpses at Rachel's passive face at being handed the pamphlets. 

The doctor points directly at Danny. "You on the other hand need to get some stuff figured out. Everything in this pregnancy pamphlet may not be useful to you since you are not the one pregnant. But you do have to be prepared, and know how to handle and care for children." Chin says as he grabs another pair of pamphlets. Danny notes that these are focused more on toddler care and baby's 24 months old. 

"Its alright doctor. I've trained him well. He's got plenty of knowledge in child care."

“Ugh, thanks, doc.” Danny mumbles awkwardly, taking the other set of pamphlets from him. 

“You should come back to the clinic, get a pregnancy test secured to make sure though. Also be careful of movement, you shouldn't stress yourself too much in this phase.” Rachel nods to the Doctors orders, her eyes focused. 

When Rachel finally puts her pants on and say goodbyes to the doctor, they're finally released, and outside of the clinic. The moment their out the door Danny had suggested that Rachel should stay at his place tonight.

“No. It’s okay.” She says quickly.

“You sure? ”

“Yes I’m bloody sure.”

“Why not?” Danny's pleading. He's in a mother hen mood now.

“Because your place is not my home, and I’m not helpless, Daniel. I can take care of myself. And besides Benny’s and Sara's sitter bailed on me short notice, so I have to be home early. I’ll see you soon, okay?”

“At least let me take you home,” Danny whines pathetically.

“Look, Daniel, go home first. I’m not even sure I’m pregnant yet, so you can coddle me when I am legitimately pregnant. Be the mother hen you actually are when I'm with child. Now stop pouting." She grabs Danny by the chin and pushes his chin upwards, trying to lift his his head up to her eyes. "Now stop blocking me from the road so I can hail a damn cab." 

Daniel Williams did not pout no matter what Rachel says; he does not pout, he whines, but doesn't pout. “Well then tell Benny and Sarah I said hi.” Danny says as best he can with a hand under his chin, and then moving to the side from her. 

“Wouldn’t forget it,” she says with a quick kiss to his cheek, when she finds a cab and gets into it. 

The moment Rachel is gone, Danny heads to the parking lot, checking his pockets for his keys. Once he gets out his keys, he stops because he better not turn his head and see that he got a ticket, since he just realized he was in the clinic for longer than he expected.

He turns-nope it’s not a ticket. Its not even that his car is being towed. There'd have to be a car parked for it to be towed off. Nope. Nothing. His car is gone, leaving an vacated park spot near the sidewalk. Danny  knows that he didn't just misplace his car, he knows since this is where he placed his car. Absolutely sure of it because it was right next to the pizzeria place he was gonna order pizza from today, which it seems like he isn't going to. Danny helplessly spies the surrounding area, thinking that it'd magically appear. It doesn't show up. 

Its not that Danny liked the car, or had sentimental value for it. Sure he's had it for quite a while, but It's nothing that he'll miss. His car was more out of purpose to drive him for his job. And he certainly can afford a better car now since he does have the money to just replace it. What this is actually about is the moral of it. How could a person just take a car off the street? In fact, a crappy car, off this specific street? He does admit that his Saturn didn't have much of an alarm system and it wouldn't take a skilled mechanic not that much mental power to steal. But still, Danny's mind boggling with possible answers, _what in gods name will they get out of it_? 

“Great! Just great.” Danny says with a smile, his voice nearly above a shout. “You know what it really is great! Because I could be a father and I am not letting my fucking good mood become foul because of an asshole or multiple assholes decided to take my car. I hope you have a fucking nice day with my car.” He doesn't know why he's yelling at imaginary people that are probably miles away from where he is. He's just exasperated, mad and a whole bunch of other things right now. 

“Asshole." _Or assholes,_ he thinks. His teeth grit into a hard line, as he Danny makes his way to the sidewalk. Danny decides he should just walk home. If Danny just puts most of his weight on his other knee he could make it their in a hour or so. He feels a rain droplet fall on his head, and deserts the plan altogether. “Great just fucking great, this is absolutely great.” He brings his head towards the sky; tempted to scream at it and flip it the finger. Danny refrains from doing it though, so he doesn't want to add 'crazy man who likes to curse at the sky  with 'man who yells at empty car spots.' He's pretty sure he'd get sent to the psyche ward for that. 

Instead he hails just hails for a cab to take him home. Danny thinks that his bad luck streak is finally over when he gets into the cool, dry cab, where he rests his head against the back seat. 

But of course, because he's the butt of all jokes, (and the universe just really hates him) a total stranger opens the opposite side of the door, coming in to steal his cab. 


	2. An Amateur Cab Theif

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short Chapt. 
> 
> Revised yet again. 
> 
> Enjoy!!!

"Who the hell are you?” Danny asks utterly dumbfounded at the man entering the cab, letting the rain in. Danny can't believe his luck. He really can't.

Is it so hard for Danny to know what he did so bad to deserve such a shitty day? Danny has spent way too many hours in the gynecologist room, talking about the process of fertilization and the miracles of the female genital, had his car stolen, his hair ruined because of the stupid acid rain and now the pinnacle to his crappy day (when really it should be the happiest day) is this asshole is trying to steal his cabbie.

“Steve McGarrett." The dude, ‘Steve’ says, turning towards his direction. He brings his hand out, possibly for Danny to shake. Danny doesn't thought.

And whoa. Steve McGarrett is by far not an average looking guy in Danny's books. 

The guy has a dark swat of slightly curly, brown hair that's slick with rain and sticking to his forehead. Suddenly the man smiles and its blinding to Danny by how white the dudes teeth are. His stubble the perfect amount that Danny finds acceptable in a man, with crows feet at the end of each eye that made the man seem older than he actually was. And nose arched in between recesses of those deep greenish eyes that are dotted with specks of brown that are almost blocked out by long lashes. Danny has a strange thought of how good butterfly kisses would be against his skin, spine tingling at the thought. With just a simple grey shirt Danny could tell this Steve guy was built. All muscle and bones sinewed and shaped into powerful arms, legs and compact chest; which brought out even more detail by the wetness of his shirt. “Danny…” He says dumbly, brain still trying to catch up with his mouth, because Danny's mind is trying to figure out any other adjective to describe this guy. None of them seem to work except for 'greek god' or 'adonis' to accurately describe him. He’s about to play flirt when he has enough brain cells to realizes that said 'greek god' is trying to steal his cab. He totally forgets how hot Steve is, and instead goes onto full rant mode.

“You think you’re funny?” Danny says heatedly, which makes the man flinch, but it’s quickly replaced with an open grin. 

“Some people-

“Because you aren’t!” Danny yells over him. “This is my cab, not yours, mine.”

“I don’t see your name on it.” Steve smirks again. 

Danny glares at the man. "Are you a child?" Danny questions with a slitted eyes. "No smartass obviously my name isn't on it. I mean that this is the cab, that I procured for myself to take me home. You.” Danny said, pointing at Steve. "Are stealing my cab." 

The man just smirks even more. It would have really grilled Danny into a lecture on the etiquette’s of cab mannerisms, when a third voice says, "can you just tell me where to go.”

“Shuttup,” Danny says to the cab driver. Danny doesn't really mean it. He's just irritated by that goddamn beautiful smirk. He hates it.

“Hey, now. Leave the poor guy alone, Danno. He's just doing his job.”

“Your right. I'm sorry. I didnt mean to yel- Danno? What the fuck is a Danno? Is that supposed to be my name? Because that is not my fucking name.” Danny pokes him in the chest to seem more intimidating, like he’s an imitation of Al Capone.”It’s Danny, capisce? Danny!” He hopes it gets the point through that Danny doesn't take kindly to others mocking him.  

“Whatever you say, Danno.” Steve finishes off with another playful smile, like he's almost about to snicker. 

The situation is just pointless and foolish, he shouldn't entertain it anymore than necessary. But Steve looks like he's ready to incite him some more so he counts to 10, closing his eyes, blocking whatever Steve says, and then promptly gets out of the cab. Once he’s out of the cab, he spots a subway entrance and just decides to take that route even though that'll take longer. 

He stomps all the way down the stairs, and pays his way through the station. He doesn't try to think of the nagging in his mind about the guy who stole his cab. He's not gonna allow himself to dwell on bad thoughts. He just became a dad. Or well, almost is. More likely he is going to be a dad. Because Rachel has to be pregnant, and he'll be a father soon after.

 _Its good the menace is finally gone_ , Danny thinks, trying to and failing to forget about the situation. If he feels a wave of disappointment that he'll never seeing the guy again, he doesn’t acknowledge it. _It's not like it would have gone anywhere_. As the doors open, he pushes through people in the crowded subway train. Knowing he can't really get a seat, he lets his hand hold on to a railing, supporting his bum knee as he gets swarmed by other people passing by in and out of the train.  

“Hey," a voice whispers behind his back. "Why didn’t you take the cab?”

Danny doesn't know which feeling is worse. The creepy stalker vibe he's getting or the light flutter in his gut at hearing the voice.

“Hi,” Steve says. His smile so open and genuine it hurts to look at. 

Danny is going to have a freak soon. Because Steve McGarrett is not only a super model, but he’s obviously a stalker, and no matter how flattering that may be, it’s still considered fucking creepy in the eyes of society.

“Me? Why didn’t you take it you neanderthal animal.”  
   
“Danny I told you I’d leave the cab to you."

“Well I obviously wasn’t listening. And look at that you can actually say my name properly, congratulations.” He pats Steve on the shoulder, turning away from him.

Steve makes a peeved face. Like someone told him he couldn't have his favourite toy to play with. “Did you just call me a neanderthal? Really? I know I may be built like one, but I sure ain't one."

"Yes I did. And I called you a neanderthal animal because you act like one, not because you look like one.”

“Are you always this angry?”

“Are you always this annoying?” Danny retorts back, but it was more rhetorical then questioning. 

“Yes,” Steve says honestly, shrugging. "I like to know more about people. More specifically people who like to blame me when they steal my cab."

Danny sighs. "I did- you know what. Stop talking."

"Oh come on, it was obviously my cab. I had the guys attention first." Steve continues to say, adding kindling to Danny's ire. 

Danny eyes almost seem to bulge out of his sockets. "First off, it parked on my side. That is a clear indicator it was my cab." 

Danny feels the slightest huff on his neck. "There was no space on my side, the dude parked on your side so I could cross the street and get it." 

“Okay, lets not continue this redundant argument. You are wrong. I am right. And you are ruining my good mood even more.”   
  
“Well I’m sorry. With the way you were acting it seemed you were already in a bad mood.”  
  
“Yes, Steven, which only makes it more appropriate to not, I repeat NOT, put said person in a even more bad mood!” Danny rants loudly, hands trying to convey his annoyance even in the cramped space. He's trying his hardest not to smack the guy on the back of the head. He's also conscious to the fact that he's in the subway. A crowded subway. Where people are looking rather annoyed at them. 

But the guy has the gall to grin at him which causes Danny to just raise a hand and smother Steve's face with it, trying to shut his stupid mouth from speaking anymore, because if he does, Danny is going to do something he's gonna regret doing in a public place. Danny really is starting to hate this guy.

After a while Danny submerses into silence, trying his hardest to move as far away from Steve which is pretty difficult to do since everyone on the train is smooshed together. Danny makes the mistake of pushing too hard, and suddenly he’s being pushed back by irritated New Yorkers, and back into Steve’s chest. 

“Well this is nice.” Steve says over Danny's shoulder. His breath gentle on the back of Danny's breath. 

“Stop talking.” And he does, well only because he seems to be enjoying Danny's invasion of his space. Danny doesn't know if he should be thankful or peeved about that. 

Once the train halts on his stop, Danny rushes out with some of the crowd, hoping to God Steve doesn’t get off this stop. And since when did he and this man, who he’s barely known for an hour, go from strangers to first name acquaintances? Which Danny knows is a respectable time, but still doesn’t seem right in some way. It irks him that he can be so open with him. He hasn't been able to make friends, by being that carefree and open, in a while. He usually keeps it at bay because people tend to not appreciate Danny's habit of rants and gesticulating hand gestures. 

  
When he gets up the stairs, and out into the fresh New York air. The rain has stopped leaving it a bit damp, but Danny doesn’t care he loves this place, its home, or closest to home Danny has. It’s the same Concrete and asphalt jungle with the lingering smell of greasy chilli hotdogs, like Jersey was. But right now this is where Danny has those feelings of home, and he really can’t wait to show his kid the wonders of this place. He’d take his kid to the ball games and make a Yankees fan out of his; well girl or boy, probably go to the local bakery’s down the block from his street with his kid and Danny would probably end up spoiling the kid rotten too, he’d make a great father, Danny thinks. He’s about to reminisce about how great New York is when he hears a:  
  
“So why were you in such a good mood? You know, before I ruined it apparently.”

Danny inwardly sighs, before replying: “Because good things are happening to me, really good actually, amazing things. And when good things like that are happening to me, I say good things are happening to me to other people so they too can grasp, in some metaphysical way, that I am in a good mood.” Danny takes a pause to look at Steve, who’s giving him a quizzical look. “Did that make any sense to you?”

“Not even a bit.” Answers Steve. “Okay let me rephrase my last question. What is making you so happy?”

“What is this, twenty questions? Are you Barbra Walters or something?” Steve didn’t seem to understand that, looking all nonplussed. “It's just 'good things, Steve.'” Danny replied sarcastically, if only to acquiesce him with an answer. 

"Gee, that's a bucketful of information." 

"Can you just acknowledge the fact that I'm happy without actually knowing what is making me happy?" _Because said certain thing isn't even fully proven to happen yet._ Danny hates talking so enigmatically. It's not his style.

"Okay fine. I'll accept that stupid answer." 

“You know I don’t usually say this, but for this moment I think that it’s solely appropriate for me to say I’m not allowed to talk to strangers." Which causes Steve gives him the eye roll and respond with one of his oh so witty response when Danny continues with: “strangers who steal cabs, are assholes, and who have a habit of annoying the crap out of me.”

“Were not strangers, Danno. We know each other’s names. It's a rule that if you know each others name then those people aren't considered strangers anymore,” Steve says it in a matter of fact attitude that it almost seems childish. Actually Danny thinks it is actually really childish. "Plus you don't mean that. Everyone says I'm lovable."

Danny rolls his eyes in a manner that isn't meant to hide it. "You sure are an acquired taste, babe." Why is Danny still entertaining this asshole? He doesn't know why he keeps responding when he knows full on well he could just ignore him. "And no. That's a dumb rule. If you get to make stupid rules like that, then I get to make one, too. We're not strangers if you know my last name, Steven. But you don't know it, therefore this is not a consented friendship. And as I told you before its Danny. You can't even get my name right, you damn lunatic. We're still strangers," he says with a smile. 

“But you know mine, and you’ve given me a nickname. We are too. Acquaintances at least." Steve says it like its something to be proud about. Danny shouldn't feel so compelled to be happy about it, too. 

Danny sighs, finally relenting to this idiots ideas. “And I will woefully regret that to my very grave. The day Steve McGarrett and I became acquainted.” Danny lies. He knows he's lying and he doesn't care. 

Steve chuckles delightfully. “Woefully? Really Danny? Are you gonna recite a Shakespearean sonnet now?”

“It’s my work word of the day; don’t mock it.” Danny says gingerly retorting to Steve.

Steve suddenly stops walking, making Danny stop walking for some reason as well. Danny blinks, his eyebrows raised. He hadn't realize he'd been walking so amiably with Steve, that they've walked nearly 4 blocks since they left the station. “Well whatever going on with you that’s so good, I hope it continues happening.” Steve gives him a gentle smile with those greenish brown eyes lighting up, it makes Danny wish he could make more smiles happen just like that.

Danny doesn't exactly know how to respond, more so because of how unfeigned it was rather than how random it was. "Your compliment has been noted, reply, is-ugh, pending.”  Danny says curtly while turning his back on Steve and heading to the direction to his house. He just needs to get out of this damn situation before it gets more complicated than it needs be.

“Wait, there’s a penny on the floor.” Steve blurts out, his eyes telling Danny that he'd just said something really stupid and he'd wish he could take it back with all his willpower.  “Why don’t you pick it up. It’s considered good luck,” Steve finishes lamely. His hand points towards said copper penny on the floor. 

“You know I've heard this tradition once from two wise man, a really strange tradition for pennies, where they told me that a penny's only lucky if its heads up. So no, babe, I ain't picking it up." But Danny does get on his good knee (the one he didn’t tear his ACL with) and picks the coin, flipping the coin over to heads. “There, now some sucker will find a dirty penny on the sidewalk, or luck," he adds just for the hell of it.

He segues to the path to his house. He doesn't know if its a hallucination or its real but he hears a soft ‘bye’ from someone he knows for sure is Steve. And where does a complete stranger he bumped into get the idea that it's reasonable to just become friends and say goodbye to each other like that? How does someone just get attached to a stranger that they need to say goodbye like they've been good friends for years. But in the end he retaliates, raising his hand upwards, and sends a goodbye back; but never turning around to look back.

After a few more minutes of walking, Danny can see his restaurant up ahead. Once he's inside, he goes straight to the kitchen area where he checks up on his chefs, waiters and waitresses. He works with them for a few hours before closing, because it'll be easier to not think about the guy if he's working, and not upstairs to be left with his thoughts. Once the few customers trickle out of the restaurant, Danny closes up and tells everyone to go home an hour early once they're done with cleanup in the kitchen. That just leaves Danny to close the doors and have the shutters pulled down on the windows, and have all the chairs set up on top of the tables. 

Danny waste another 30 more minutes by sweeping the floor and mopping it twice. In the end Danny inevitable has to head upstairs and go into his apartment. He quickly takes the stairs, grabbing the cane he usually keeps on the railing, and takes the stairs with less difficulty now.

It usually takes Danny a while before he can muster an appetite after cooking in the kitchen, so he sets a small pot with boiling water for pasta for one. It'd be a disgrace to his italian heritage that he makes pasta for one, but he doesn't really care much for heritage anymore these days. He goes and brushes his teeth in the mean time, and puts on some comfortable clothing. He goes back into the kitchen, takes a peek of the water and sees that the water is bubbling now, puts a few strings of pasta in it, and leaves to put the top on while he goes to make a nice sauce. He doesn't know when or how he just ends up with a plate of pasta in front of him on his mahogany table, where he's sitting down and silently eating, all alone. Danny thinks that it's just become habit, that he makes dinner like this. All by himself. No one to entertain or to give him a hand. It's just him, and his absent minded cooking. The rest of the day just ends in blur, something Danny doesn't really understand, or ever really wants to as he finally makes his way to his bed.

He calls Rachel, because no matter what she says, Danny will continue to coddle from the beginning.

“Hey.”

“You know I thought you’d call me the moment I left in that cab. I seriously thought you died or something,” She says in a light mocking tone.

“I would have if an idiot hadn’t annoyed me the whole day.”

“Who?” Rachel asks innocently

Danny thinks its better not to talk about Steve, and decides its not important. “It’s really nothing,” he says, voicing his own opinion. 

“Okay, but your really should practice your people skills. You can be a bit too much.”

Danny would laugh at how ironic this conversation is, but instead snorts at her comment. “So… do you feel pregnant?”

Rachel giggles. “I’m okay, if you wanted to know.”

“Sorry, right. How are you feeling?”

“Daniel it’s not going to happen like that,” she makes a snapping sound on the phone. “But I do have a good feeling about it.” Her voice suddenly turning into a light tone.

“If you say so.”

“Oh my uterus is never wrong. I've told you many times before that my vagina is magical,” Rachel says with all the seriousness she can muster. 

“Okay and now I’m leaving. I’ve had enough talk about reproductive organs. Specifically your magical vagina. ” Danny is mentally reminded of all the images when he saw in Dr. Kelly's office. Birth, needles and inflamed genitals are horrifying. 

Danny can still hear her laughing when he hangs up, putting his phone beside him on his bed. 

He doesn’t know why he goes to bed at 3 in the morning, but the day has just seemed too much for Danny, that it left him with too much to think about. Sitting on his luxury buy bed, he rests his head on the soft satiny pillows. His eyes still staring at the smooth surface ceiling.  The thought that he might possibly be a dad, a parent soon, makes his head spin so much. As well as the encounter he had with the tall stranger, it just makes his head hurt even more along with the damn spinning. It feels like his life is going farther than he imagined it would ever go. It's dizzying for him that he will have a child, a family to look after. He tries not to think about how his child will question why he doesn't have a partner. It's too early to think about things like that. And he's made the choice already. Relationships aren't going to happen anytime soon with how busy his schedule will actually be in the near future with his new addition. Danny sighs, feeling the tired weight on his shoulders. His head still throbbing, spinning with all these thoughts, possibilities and uncertainty.

It all starts to wane for every hour he stays up, his thoughts begin to lose their importance, except for the one need to get some rest. His eyelids starting to droop, finally allowing him to drift off to a leisurely sleep. Its a small paradise to rest his anxiety. 


	3. The Damned, Condemned, Treacherous Restaurant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chapta 3  
> up and running now.  
> I think I might stick to a 1 week posting. or maybe much more than that. i think that latest would be a week and a half.

The Desdemona Restaurant is something Danny’s always been proud about. It's a place he made out of his own sweat and blood. Something that Danny can check on his personal bucket list of ‘things to be proud about his life.’ He worked day after day saving up money, and took a considerable portion of his mother’s will money in to building it. It was really a satisfying moment of his life when he first walked into the open loft. He'd never imagine himself ever owning a restaurant. Most of his life goals had been set out to be a person in law or to be in the field as a cop.

Sometimes life doesn't turn out the way its supposed to be, well, at least that's what it felt like for Danny. But even when the world kicked him down, Danny still found some semblance to move on with his life, to do the next best thing for himself, and not just sit and mope, to stagnate and waste away his life. No. Danny is never a quitter. He was too damn stubborn. So when he worked his way to a decent chef status he'd been given good advice to move up and do something more with his culinary skills.

So when he bought the place Danny had had help from Rachel, Stan and a few of their friends who were in the renovating business. It had taken a few days to get rid the old, graying carpeting and have it all replaced with a maroon cedar flooring. The walls had taken a whole 5 days since it had been a lot more difficult to set up. Danny had wanted to get rid of the grungy grey stone masonry, and have it all replaced with a nice faded black and red brick pattern. Once that was done it took a few weeks to buy and lay out all the tables and chairs, and to have the bar station set up. Once Danny had electricity, Rachel had elected one of her friends -who was an actual electrician that Danny could trust, and not get scammed by - to organize a lighting system and hang up the chandeliers and light fixtures for the eatery.

After another week went buy they set up the piping in the kitchen and bar station so that they'd have clean running water. It was all coming along great, but it really started to dawn on Danny that his restaurant dream wasn't a dream anymore. It became more than that, it was his reality. It became especially clear when he saw the place light up when it was at night, when they were just finishing up and Danny had just wanted to take an outside perspective view of the place. During that time he did that, he saw through the open bay windows, the arrangement of chairs, tables and ensemble decorations, all displayed like it was taken straight out of a professional gourmet magazine. Danny felt a sense of accomplishment and pride. Even with the shitty hand life had given him. It had felt to Danny like he moved on with his life.

And so here it all is, the fruits of his labours, which lead Danny to setting up tables in meticulous fashion. Danny took into account the amount of people each table fit, and whether it would be comfortable for a person to eat and have enough space so they could around a bit. The tables themselves were a nice beige colour that worked well with the navy blue of the walls, Danny didn't require table cloths because the tables themselves had been textured in a way that it would grip on to the plates and cups and plus Danny had thought the price for cleaning them would be just plain wasteful.

The ensembles for many of the tables varied, each of the tables containing one of four different mounted piece of glass work that held varying pieces of leaves and herbs, all of it intricately woven like they were making a double helix around a candle.

Rachel had opted to add some modern paintings to the restaurant, but Danny had chosen to have the walls bare of paintings, and have decorations of golden arches and opaque glass windows, instead.

After a while, the atmosphere of the restaurant really started to show through and it felt more like Danny's eatery rather than a vacant loft.

The exterior design of the place was pretty much left out sans for a hangar so I sign could be slung on it, and to have new blue sun covers to loom over the restaurant. It was all left alone because the nearly black, brownish brick walling worked perfectly with the interior design. It gave Danny the idea, that if he became popular enough, he'd extend the place with patio decks upfront.

All that was left was to name the place.

It had occurred to Danny one morning when he was getting all the legal stuff through with owning a restaurant in his loft. It, embarrassingly, had come to a total surprise by Danny when he was approached by Rachel what he was going to name the restaurant.

"Huh. I hadn't thought about that." Danny said perplexed by how he'd overlooked that.

Rachel gave a tilt of her head, giving Danny a surprised look. "Really?" Rachel gave a small chuckle. "And here I thought you were mister 'get all meticulous details sorted out asap or I'll have a stroke.'"

"Shit, Rach, what am I going to do?"

"You want me to name the restaurant?" Rachel said, placing her hand on her chest, as though she was mocking him. "Well I'd never think you'd come to your senses and find me to give you valuable insight."

Danny rolled his eyes. "Fine. Let me just think about it for a few weeks."

"Danny come with me," Rachel said, as she forcefully grabbed Danny's hand, leading him outside of the restaurant. "What do you feel when you look at that?" Rachel said, pointing to Danny's restaurant, towards the empty sign holder, and then slowly pointing towards the innards of his restaurant through the windows. "Focus on the first thought that comes to mind that actually makes sense, okay?"

"Well first off I feel cold. It's freezing outside and all I'm wearing is a damn shirt."

Rachel smacked him on the back of the head and told him to focus.

"Okay, okay, jeeze. Alright, I'm focusing. What do I see?" Danny said, peering at his opening restaurant and seriously thought about the restaurant. Not just focusing on feeling pride for succeeding. For forging his own path and doing what he thought was best. He'd never get tired of it. But Danny went further than that. Why he'd actually bought the restaurant, why he became a chef, why this restaurant was for all intents and purposes sort of like a child to Danny. It was choice he made that he'd never regretted. It was something he felt his family would hate. They'd condemn him for working as the bottom feeders in the economy,even if he was making loads of cash, they'd still stereotype his position as a chef weak and undermining.

"Desdemona," Danny said.

"Desdemona? Like Othello?"

"Yeah."

Rachel gave him a quirky smile. "You were always such an english dork in college. Now you name a restaurant after a Shakespearean character. Did the ink from the pages sink into your brain or what?"

Danny gave a shrug. "I liked that tragedy the best. Plus Desdemona does fit with what this restaurant represents to me. She was condemned for her choices and she still went through it because she loved the guy. I feel like that relates to me. You know, me and... and my fami-"

"I get it, Danny, I do." She gave Danny a sympathetic look "I've read the book in the same class as you," Rachel said stopping Danny from explaining, "and it's a brilliant name."

"Desdemona," Danny repeated to himself. He moved toward the bare door and opened it, and with a gesture of his hands, lead Rachel in, saying: " welcome to the Desdemona."

\----------------------7 Years ago--------------------------------------------

It was 11 years after Danny’s mother’s death and he had never heard anything from his family. It had been a moot point in contacting them, and it was a rather unthinkable point that they would contact him.

But it was at that time that he was notified to be at the Williams estate. He got a call from a stranger addressing him curtly to meet at the Williams residence at 4 am. By his father’s orders.

Danny didn't know at the time why his father would want to see him. It made him nervous as well as a sick sort of enjoyment from it. It was strange, that he was excited to meet his abusers once again.

His heart was racing at the one answer he had brewing in his head. He never thought that he’d get his family back, but maybe this was his father’s way of getting them all back together, making amends to Danny. It was a small fantasy of Danny’s, but he never really thought much of it, because it would just kill him to know he was wrong.

He'd always been told that he'd been the most optimistic of his siblings. Told with a sturdy hand to the shoulders that he just let things happen and never did anything to change them.

A coward is what his father was trying to say.

He gets into his old Saturn and drives to his old house.

As he drives down the path, and closer to the neighbourhood, he can suddenly see the clear, spotless road and endless upon endless of two story houses with perfectly cut lawns and varying forms of shrubbery. It felt like everything was judging him, like they some how knew he didn't belong. Once he see's the big gold brown building up ahead and puts his car to park on the curving driveway, near the mouth of the gate that lead to the garage. He didn't bother to park it inside the garage driveway, he didn't know if the password was the same as before. It was better he just leave it where is.

It would also would be a quick way for Danny to leave the damn place if he suddenly felt threatened. So he decided to walk to the other side, where the main entrance to the house was, and looked at the large expense of finely cut topiary. Danny also noticed that they recently added a new modern fountain along the pathway, it was pure white with a big black pyramid in the middle, spouting water at the tip. The house, though, still looked the same to Danny. Menacing and domineering, but you also could respect the fine architecture of the place. All geometric shapes and organic ones forming into one singular, giant mansion. Lined in the front of the mansion was a row of two-story doric columns that left a big gap in the middle where the ebony double entry doors were positioned. The doors themselves had been specifically carved to have a grim looking wold on them, each of them both carrying door knockers in their mouths.

The Williams were a rich family.

An understatement that speaks for itself as they live in the richest parts of WestChester county. His father was born with a silver spoon in his mouth, and so was his mother. And the same went for all of his children. They brought out even more money by Matty’s success as a stock broker and Donna being a successful real-estate business owner.

Danny hasn’t been in the estate for nearly 5 years. He never thought he’d come back. When he came up by the front door, he was gladly greeted by a familiar face, Tracey.

Tracey was Danny’s 3rd nanny, has been for the last 9 years of his childhood till he turned 16. He always remembers her warm smile. She'd always give Danny extra cookies and let him stay up a little bit early at night. She was Danny’s only friend in the big house.

“Daniel,” she says with a bright smile. “It’s so good to see you.”

“Same goes to you Tracey.”

“Hope you’re doing alright by yourself.” Her lips primmed in worry and sadness.

“It's good so far. I've got my own place, its crappy, but it works. I'm also getting somewhere in the cooking industry, so there's some income for me.

“A chef?” She says in a teasing tone, her eyes lighting up a bit. “I clearly remember your try at macaroni casserole. Such a mess,” she says with a shake of her head.

“I was 7. Blame me.”

“The house smelled like burnt cheese for weeks," she said, huffing out and leading Danny down the main hallway.

“At least I didn’t burn down the house,” Danny huffs back.

“Don’t get so testy dear. I’m only joking.” She says patting down his shoulder. “How have you been? Really?"

Danny gives a pause to the question. “I’ve been doing good,” he lies.

Tracey gives him a sad smile. “The house just isn’t the same without your rambling.” She says teasing tone coming back. “Now prepare yourself, come on, everyone’s in your father’s office.”

“Why am I here in the first place?” Danny asks because he has ideas, but he just needs to pinpoint them to the right mark.

“No, I’m sorry. I don’t really know, but it’s something to do with your mother, it's all I know.”

Danny made a confused face at that. His mother died so long ago. How did was she, in anyway, involved with this meeting.

She turns him to the left, down the familiar halls that Danny grew up with, and he passes by the spacious living room. He remembers empty Christmases; no family festivities of any sorts. He also remembers waking up to birthdays where he was prepped up like a damn prized horse and told to smile and accept every goddamn congratulations from strangers he's never met in his entire life. It was a tiring, crazy life the rich lived and Danny was glad he no longer was part of it.

But Danny also remembers him and Rachel, sometimes. very rarely, Donna and Matty when they weren’t studying. We'd be running around playing in childlike tandem. Those are the times Danny ever really felt like he had a family. Felt like he was loved, even if they were seldom occasions.

But he also remembers how far that love only goes. To be loved in the Williams family you have to be successful. You have to achieve and strive to the acceptable ranks. If you can't be the best - the very best to them - then your value is nothing. Danny has never been that kind of person, or ever will be, he can't please everyone. His parents have known that since he was 16, when he told them.

\-------------------19 years later-----------------------------

It was always strange to have family meetings. Danny had believed that they were stuff that the T.V made up. The only strange thing about them is that they actually happened, in his house, in his fathers office room. His father never really seemed interested in them, even though he was the one that initiated it. It seemed to Danny that his father just liked to order them around, but not to actually tolerate or get to know them when his so called family meetings happened.

They all sat in the living room. Posture straight and precise, except for Danny, who slumped into the living room, where his dad and mom had were standing.

"You've made a terrible choice, Danny," his mother quipped from where she sat down.

They know for sure.

Danny didn't really doubt that they knew, he just wished so badly that he could make the inevitable never happen. Just wish that it'd all been a bad dream and he could have a chance with Gordy.

But Danny was already accepting of the fact that it didn't happen like that. Stigma from gay people would never go away just because he simply wished for it. No matter how hard he'd want to scream for his rights as a human being, it'd always go over ignorant ears. His parents weren't much for being good Samaritans, they mostly just held the conservative values of keeping capitalism alive and thriving and to have traditional, well bred families. It didn't bode well for anyone to be different in their house hold, his family would not accept it simply because he didn't uphold his traditions, and the other rich, heartless families would just condemn them all for having a fag in their household. Danny knew what he'd been walking into since he guessed their solemn expressions in the living room.

"Hey." Danny awkwardly said to them.

"We fucking heard all over the damn neighborhood how you sexually harassed one of your male classmates."

"Is that what there calling it? No, sir. I fucked Gordy in the bleachers. And I fucking loved it. In fact we've had sex here too." His teeth gritting so hard. Dany didn't realize how far the story Gordy had spun out to make him feel like the scapegoat to their mess of a relationship.

"How could you?" His father said a short while after. His hands were gripping the back of the couch, fingers digging into the soft cushion."

Danny leaned his head back, knuckles turning white at the absurdity of all this. "Excuse me, sir? How could I what?"

"Don't you dare sass me boy. You fucking made a choice to be this... to be a fucking degenerate fairy," his father said through gritted teeth. "And now you've turned a fine young man into a damned, disgusting queer."

Danny wanted to respond, but his mothers voice peeped into the conversation.

"Do you hate us, Daniel. Do you wan't want to smear the Williams name?" His mother asked, shaking her head vigorously, her hair spinning in jumbled swirls. "I've gotten calls from McLaurent and Lester from upstate, telling me that their cancelling your lesson plans for the year altogether. You can't be a member in their golf club now! It's horrible what the other families are talking about us, too. I can't bear to be looked down upon," his mother cried hysterically.

"I don't care about not going to some preppy, bullshit golfing society. I also don't care about my fucking stupid Polo lessons either or the damn school club. It's good that they're looking down on you, mom, like I give a damn." Danny said, wanting to rip out his hairs at how frustrated he was. "It's all stupid rich crap I could give hulking shit about. So what if I did fuck him? What if I am a queer? I'm a goddamn human being and I don't deserve this bullshit especially from you-"

His voice was suddenly cut off. He was ranting so hard he didn't realize his father came right by him until he swung his arms out.

It wasn't until after a while that Danny realized his father was doing. His hands wrapped around Danny's neck in a terrifying vice grip. His father was choking him.

"Shut the hell up you stupid boy. You don't deserve a proper punch like a real man would. You're a fucking no good faggot. You die like a faggot!"

"Oh, Walter! Stop it!" His mother cried out weakly. She didn't dare stand up, too afraid and stunned at the scene happening before her eyes.

Danny felt his fathers hands clasping painfully around his neck, feeling the heady rush of oxygen deprivation. He was scratching at his father arms and face, trying to make him let go. His father did let him go, slowly he slid his arms off of Danny's neck and instead grabbed at the lapels of his shirt. Danny felt the small relief of air rushing to his lungs, but it was soon replaced by a sudden sharp pain in his stomach that felt like a punch, followed by another one on his right side and then a hard shove to the floor; causing him to bang his head hard on the granite flooring.

"Look, you goddamn FAGGOT," he heard his father say, his figure hovering over his spotty vision. "I'm going to give you very clear instructions on what you are going to do. You will pack up your clothes. You will give me your keys, all of them. You are going to walk out of this house," eyes unwavering, emotionless, nothing. "You are never coming back to this house." The statement loaded with such a finality that it leaves Danny, even in his condition, so dumbfounded that he just stares out into the space above his fathers head. He can't really mean that.

Danny knew his parents would never accept him, but somehow seeing it all played out like this, to reveal a cold, dark truth. It felt like a slap to the face. He nodded at his fathers orders, slowly realizing that it wasn't ever a surprise to begin with. He was terrified and afraid and his parents didn't care about him. He was alone.

“Get the hell out of my sight, boy.”

His father walked past Danny on the floor, he nearly flinched at how close his foot was to his face. He was was soon followed by his weeping mother. Danny painfully moved away from where he was, trying his best to lean behind the arched door. Danny felt tears stream down his face and his body racked with quiet sobs, sending jolting pain to his stomach and side. He was so fucked.

Danny stayed in the spot for a few hours, waiting for the fear and panic in him to cool down, leaving him with bitterness and resentment and a foreboding anger. It didn't take long before he just left the house. He didn't care that he didn't pack clothes. He almost put his keys and car keys in the bowl, but decided to only place the house keys in. He was going to take his car for a quick ride.

Danny took the car out of the driveway and got into it. He pressed on the acceleration so hard the tires squealed. He didn't wait for the garage door open fully, breaking it off its hinges and letting it fly over the hood, scratching the paint. Danny also didn't wait for the gates to open as well, simply just driving through them. He didn't stop his reckless driving until he made a sharp turn towards the front of the house. The tires burned rubber off as he sped up towards the entrance pathway, towards the fountain that situated itself in the middle of the entry pathway, and drove straight through it with his car.

The car ran straight through the fountain, and flew up once it hit the walls of the fountain, and rammed into the cherub spouting water from its jug at the center of it. Danny heard the loud screech of metal sliding against stone. The airbag momentarily exploding from the vehicle as the collision happened. It hadn't hurt Danny that much, he'd braced for the impact. Once the shock wore off of what he'd done, he slowly got out of the car and ran. He didn't even think about the consequences of what he did. He was just happy that in some way he let the pain and hurt subside in him. It felt like he got even with them by doing such a silly, petty thing. Danny had jumped over the fence with a practiced ease.

Danny didn't stop running until halfway through he realized he'd been heading to Rachel's house.

\---------------7 years ago--------------------

Danny knows that it's just pointless hope that flutters in his head, telling him that it’s happening, that he’s reuniting with his family. It’s the only reason why Danny actually came here. To think that maybe 11 years of reflection could change a person.

When they finally reach the doorway to his father’s office, it’s suddenly too much for Danny to take, but he keeps a straight face. This place, the main living room, is the one place in the house that he hates and fears the most.

Tracey opens the door and gestures for Danny to go in the spacious room. “’I've brought Daniel in,” she says absently as she guides Danny in, closing the door behind him when she leaves.

There’s no response from anyone except for an unfamiliar voice.

“Good, now everyone’s here.” A man says from a desk that's never been there before. It's a dark mahogany colour that seems totally off with the colour scheme in the house.

Now that Danny takes a look at the whole area, it's completely changed. It looks more modern.

The rooms always been huge and empty of any real ;living'. It never held a T.V or much of anything else that a person would make a person typecast it as a living room. In lieu of any living room items, it held mostly old bookshelves and leather sofas. It was more of a work library than anything else.

The man that Danny see's on the desk is a graying old man. His hair looked like it once was brown, only a pepper of it left at the edges of his hairline. The surprising thing that isn't so surprising is to see Matty standing up next to the fire place and still looks younger then Danny, even though he’s 8 years older than him, and they have quite the height difference, too. It always use to bug Matty when other peoples parents called him the youngest boy, and not Danny. He doesn't immediately look to Danny as he enters the door, but when he does, he gives a primmed look at Danny - like he's trying to not sneer.

Donna is sitting on the couch with her legs crossed, looking elegant in a white pencil skirt and light red blouse. Donna and Danny had never really had that much of a relationship, besides her helping Danny with his homework, teaching him, or how to work a computer. She'd been as much part of Danny's life as an absent father was to a bastard kid. It wasn't personal, their absence in his life. They cared too much for their social status to ever slander it.

Danny awkwardly behind the doors. “Ughh…”

“You can sit.” The stranger says, gesturing to the leather armchair opposite of Matty.

“Danny, do you know the reason why you are here.”

“No… I thought we-” But Danny can’t finish that thought, because he just noticed his father isn’t in the room.

“Where’s dad?”

“Your father chose not to-”

"But he's the one who asked for me."

Matty gave a empty laugh at that. "You idiot. It was Markem that gave that order," he said, pointing to the man on the desk with all the papers on it.

"Markem?"

The man gave a sigh, bringing his hands to his face to pinch the bridge of his nose. "Yes. I did. It was rude of me to imitate your fathers orders, but I feel like it was the only necessary ploy to get you here."

"You're fucking right. He'd told me to never come back here, but here I am. Why the fuck am I here?" Danny asked, suddenly tired. He didn't know whether it was from the stress of his messed-up family or just the plain sadness at being proven wrong of his false hopes.

"Your family has done a great grievance of my service. They've been uniforming you of your mothers will and what she left you. I see that you and your family maybe having difficulties of communicating with each other, but I am your mothers attorney, and she gave me very strict rules to hand you, Daniel, this inheritance.

"You've been keeping this form me?" He said beckoning for Matty or Donna to reply.

"She was drugged up and dying. She didn't know what the hell she was doing when she did it." Matty said with a grit of his teeth.

Danny nodded at that. "Fuck you, Matt."

It was embarrassing, but Danny's eyes started to gloss over. He bit his tongue and turned his knuckles white at trying to ground himself to not scream and yell out.

"It's always been about money," Danny said shaking his head. "Christ!" Danny yelled at his stood up from his place and flipped the coffee table over. "Always comes back down to fucking money. Well good news for you guys, you can shove my inheritance up your ass. Happy?"

"Careful, Daniel. You don't want to make another scene again," Donna said, her curt voice ripping through him. "Dad won't be pleased you've chipped his favourite glass sculpture."

Danny brought his face up, nearly glancing at the ceiling, trying to placate himself into some decorum to his body. "Sorry, sis. For a moment there I thought we were family, and that I could act like a normal person in the situation I've been put in. But sure. I'll be quiet for him."

"Don't be so sarcastic with me, Daniel."

"What the fuck? Are you serious? We're fucking siblings for godsakes why the fuck does that asshole control every part of our lives!"

“We’re not family,” Donna finally spits out as she lifts her purse, and heads out the door in one quick stride, she pauses mid stride while she leaves. "You made your choice, Daniel. We don't appreciate those that don't believe in our family's choices."

"Your choices are shitty and cruel." He spits out with just as much venom.

Matty silently follows with her. It's always been like that. Matty and Donna leaving him. It's always been the same. It's never going to change.

“I was hoping that wouldn’t happen,” the man, Markem, says.

Danny just stares at the man. He’s so fucking mad, mad at his family, mad at his life, mad at his own stupidity that he could mend his family’s relationship. Something that Danny could never fix. But he just slumps on his chair and tries to forget this horrible moment. His siblings can't even stand to be near him, much less accept him.

“So your her attorney?”

“Yes, I'm your mothers attorney, and you are going to be a very wealthy man, that is, if you don’t decline the offer I’m giving you.”

“I don’t want any of her money.” He's not going to accept bribe money from her.

The man shakes his head in disagreement. “That would be unwise of you.”

“Really, and whys that? That money you’re giving me is a mistake, my mother would never give me shit. No one in my family would,” Danny says derisively.

“That’s not true,” The man says shaking his head slightly. “You see Daniel she made this will for you when you were 16. I believe that they day you were told to leave the house,” he tells Danny as he hands the official papers, "so it would be unwise to let your mother’s last sentiment go to waste. She'd been very clear to me that you will get it when you were 18 years old. You see your father was outraged to hear of this predicament and decided to keep you in the dark, successfully fooling me by playing off that you'd been given her inheritance, when really he's been keeping it from you. I'm sorry that I hadn't noticed until now. I only noticed his deception when he'd given me the wrong date on one of her documents. I figured out it was a lie, and wheedled out all the information with a threat to put him in court for his treachery."

Danny can’t believe the words he’s hearing, he almost wishes he heard wrong, heard it all wrong and that he’s just dreaming. But it’s real, he sees the papers, and he sees that it was documented on 1993, November 5. The exact date Danny left the estate.

“Is this real? Danny ask stupidly, tears starting in his eyes. But he doesn't care, he just needs more proof of what's been given to him. Hope.

“You can choose to believe true or fake, but it is not a lie, Daniel. She also wanted you to have this.” Markem says as he takes out a small manila envelope from his coat pocket. “These are her last words.”

Danny takes the envelope with care. He opens it up, just to see if it’s her writing. When he takes it out and sees the familiar strange cursive writings, Danny knows that it’s not a joke, and that it really is her mother’s last words.

He only reads a few sentences of the letter.

Dear Daniel.

I am sorry for what I have never been brave enough to do, what I could never say or do. I am ashamed to be called your mother. I can never forgive myself for what I have done-

That’s all Danny can read. He can’t read it, not in place like this. It's enough to give him proof.

“What-what do I have to do? I'll accept it."

“Just sign these papers and you can be off.” He hands Danny a pen and gives him the papers.

Once all of the papers have been signed, Danny thanks Markem for his effort at righting his families malpractice, and leaves the room. He gives Tracey a hug, promising to stay in touch when he's escorted out by her, the envelope held tightly in his hand as he leaves the estate. It feels like he's really leaving the damn place for the last time as he rev's his old Saturn out of the huge building.

The thing that haunts Danny though, is that he never reads the letter. Once he gets home he just puts it away in his safe and locks it away. There has always been a thought of reading the damn thing, but it always comes down with him making up an excuse and forgetting about it altogether.

He’s too afraid of what it will say, too afraid to let go of the last thing his mother left. Whether it’s her true intentions or just some cruel farce, he just can’t read it. Good or bad, it's too much of a painful revelation for both outcomes.

So he never reads it.


	4. Serendipity's A Bargain At The Market

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay.
> 
> Warning this chapt goes back and forth and back and forth because some thoughts just pop up and i need to add them in between the main story lines for clarity.

Waking up to the harsh glare of sunlight is not something Danny enjoys ever since he moved into this place. It's completely Danny's good fortune that he chose the one apartment block that actually has sunlight glaring at it from the open spaces between the skyscrapers at 6:30 in the morning. He wishes he could have chosen a spot where the sunlight never reaches him until its like 1:00, where its high up in the air for everyone else to see. The one good thing for the days that it actually happens is that he's able to take a quick walk around the park near his area. He's gotten to know that its very much beautiful to wake up and see the place when the sun reaches every corner of every leaf in the park. It's rather quite nice and it lets Danny just have a nice walk to let out his thoughts and just breathe for a minute or two before his starts off his day. Its the only thing that seems off place for his daily routine. It's not much for Danny, but at least it counts for something for his lack of spontaneity.

It's one of those clear crisp days that Danny decides that he can take on the cold weather of fall and just decide to head out for a while in the morning. Danny doesn't worry much about opening the restaurant any time soon. He's gone into this routine for a while that Kono, his other sous chef will open up it up for him if its not open already.

It's nearly 9 am when he's done walking, knee giving him the shit for walking but he'd be damned if it stopped him from taking an occasional walk.

"Hey, boss. Take another one of your contemplative walks? It is about another guy this time?"

Danny doesn't entertain her with a response. He simply moves to the stairs and changes into his work clothe attire.

Kono was a Hawaiian surfer, before she had injured her knee, and lost everything. Danny could sympathize with injuries. She had gone to New York for the same reason as Danny, to start a new life. She hasn’t lived in New York for very long, coming to Danny’s restaurant as a complete novice after she completed culinary school in Hawaii only to transfer here with prospects of a better cooking career in New York. She'd told Danny that she just liked the cuisine and wanted to get away from her nagging family for her choices.

Again, Danny could sympathize with that even more.

Danny didn’t think she’d make it her first week, but he proved Danny wrong. She may be fresh out of cook school, but she is a total wiz in the kitchen. She’s also slowly wiggled her way in the 2 something years that Danny has known her, to be one of the very few people Danny considers ‘friends.’

“There’s no guy.” Danny says curtly as he comes back down the stairs to open the fridge.

“Liar,” she says while picking her at her Malasada’s that Kono makes a fresh batch each tuesday morning for her boyfriend, Adam, when he's off work.

Speaking of said boyfriend, he comes in bustling through the door and greets Kono right away with a peck on the cheek. "Morning," she says all perky like.

"Morning to you too. Hey, hows it going to you too, Danny."

"I thought I kicked you out of my restaurant after you let an entire gang of Yakuza members into my place."

"Awww. You meant that?" Adam jokes. "They're not bad people, Danny. They're just misguided, retired, Yakuza members. Plus all they did was just eat here."

"The cop in me weeps that I've become a Yakuza hangout spot."

Adam and Kono roll their eyes. "Yes, yes, whatever," Kono says. "You're a chef now, though, an executive chef to be exact, and an executive chef that doesn't turn down generously paying customers. Plus I heard that they like this restaurant enough that they'd protect it for you. You know when shit hits the fan and stuff."

"Why?" Danny asked quizzically. "I literally serve mostly Italian food. I don't even have traditional Saki in my damn kitchen."

Adam gave a shrug. "New leash on life for them I guess. Came here to forget Japan, not be greeted by it."

“So. Back to my original question: Who the hell did you meet at 6:00 in the morning?”

“I didn’t meet anyone today." Danny says honestly. "I did meet someone yesterday." Danny says not knowing why he's bringing it up.

“Who?” they both ask.

“Some guy named Steve McGarrett. Total jackass of a guy.”

"Wow. Not only are you on first names basis with the guy, but you also needed to add his last name too. Huh."

“What? I have excellent memory when it comes to names.”

Kono grunts. “Oh really? What was that name of your last boyfriend?”

“…Joh- Joe-no- Jor…” He shut his mouth, thinking pensively about it. “It happened a long time ago!” Danny finally spits out when he can't think of a good lie.

“My point exactly. So this Steve guy must really be someone if you already remembered his name. What was he? An early jogger? Oh I bet he was."

“No, he’s really not. He stole my cab and had the nerve to blame it on me. Of course I'd have time to know the asshat's name so I could use it in a court trail. And hell, I don't know shit about him being a jogger, but he's built." Danny didn't fail to remember the tight grey shirt.

"Big built or just svelte?"

"I don't know? Can we just leave this stupid conversation alone. I highly doubt I'm seeing the guy again."

"So you want to see him?" Adam piqued in.

Danny rolls his eyes. "Get to work already. I don't pay you to gossip nonsense. And you Mr. Noshimuri, have to leave us, now, or you're going to run us late for the morning shift."

Adam just sat next to Kono, still taking his time, giving Danny a headache. No one ever listened to him.

“Did you get his number, though?” Kono said absentmindedly as she ate a piece of her doughnut. “Want one?” she says passing Danny the tray.

“No Kono, I did not, because Steven is not someone I would ever like to meet ever. Ever.” He adds another 'ever' for emphasis, which just makes Kono grin even more. Danny does take her offer, and takes malasada for himself.

Adam said his goodbyes soon after a little while, suddenly noticing the vein in Danny's head willing to pop any minute. It was suddenly just the two of them as they progressed into the kitchen room where the new menus had been put the day before.

"So you're really not interested in calling him again?" Kono brings up a few moments after they settle into a nice work pace, with them cooking and approving of new courses and meals.

“Can we just focus on today's special soup and hors d’oeuvres for this menu,” Danny said picking up thereof menus and looking at them, hoping Kono will do the same.

“Oh I'll get you talking about him, brah. Only a matter of time before you spill," Kono says primly as she picks up one of the menus, and they start getting some work done.

———————————————-------------------

Danny is on the stove sautéing some onions, for the steak he’s left marinated in the fridge. He’s done the obvious thing and started to go rambling about Steve. He knows Kono was right, but in retaliation he's gone on full rant mode just to annoy her.

“And you know what he’s wrong, it was my cab first. I hailed it."

“Whatever.” Kono says banging her head on the table. It must be the 9th time she's heard it.

“I mean he was bound to be a stalker, or some type of serial killer. He was too good looking to not have a medical history of mental disorders. I mean seriously, a guy can't have it all. That's not fair.”

“Please. I beg of you stop talking about him.” Kono muffles while her head stays down. “ 5 hours of constant chatter on the proper etiquette’s of cab mannerisms, and literally making thesis statements on why Steve's a menace to the society of New York, when all he’s really done is steal a cab by accident, is not going to do any good. So, please stop, Danny, before I’m tempted to use this knife on you.” She grabs the serrated chef knife and raising it at Danny's direction in a halfhearted fashion. "Stop talking about your stupid crush. I don't want to know anymore."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm a blabbermouth, whatever. Hey you got those chicken stocks ready or what?"

"That's my job? What happened to Trevor? Can't we pass that on to the new guy?"

Danny drops some canola oil on a new dish, and starts placing onions on the pan, he gives Kono a critical stare when he's done prepping. “You're still acting like a rookie, Kono. You’re all too laid back and hang ten. You are my sous chef, don't abuse your status like that."

“It was a joke, jeeze, you sound like my family." Kono says as she goes to the fridge and takes out a large, white plastic container. "I got it boss, all done and ready since the morning, just kept them in the fridge for now."

"Good. Now go make chicken mushroom soup for today's special. Plus, you're the one who was going to make me spill it out, so here I am, spilling about Steve."

"I asked for good details like his build or if he had tatoos or what he did. Not for you to exaggerate in meticulous detail about the guy being an idiot," Kono says as she takes a cutting board out and asks one of the other chefs for a stew pot. Danny gives her a glare which Kono returns back with an innocent shrug.

"Thanks, Kono says once she's given the board. She goes to the fridge and searches around, and then goes back to the pantry, and comes back empty handed. "Um, I think we're out of mushrooms."

"What? I just had them restocked a few days ago."

"Yeah, you did. I just think there bad now, along with a few of the other vegetables and cheeses. They're all slimey."

Danny shook his head, and came along with Kono to look at the pantry and fridge. "What the hell? Did they sell me DOA shit?" Danny asked angrily. "Seriously? Gad and Gus are gone to vacation for a 2 months and I get spoiled food from these new sales rep." Danny felt revolted that he'd been given a terrible food vendor. To be fair Danny didn't really know where to go buy his food, he didn't have much to worry about where to buy quality ingredients since most of the stuff that he'd gotten were from the Gad and Gus. It had occurred to Danny a lot that he'd terribly relied on them too much to get his restaurant going, that if they had left New York altogether, he'd be terrible at running his restaurant without them.

"It's not that bad. It's only just a few of them and we kept them sealed and away from the other food. Will just make the soup squash again for the next few days. We can switch it to chicken and then broccoli, and then we might run out."

Danny knows its just not the soup thats going to have to be repeated again. He knows that with some of the ingredients missing or rotting away, they'll have to stick to a very basic menu for a while.

"Yeah, you're right. Good idea. Its a good thing that Gad and G are coming back next week. Will go back to them for orders once they come back from Tuscany, we can make it for a few more weeks until then."

\---------------------12 Years Ago-------------------

New York was somewhat different to New Jersey. They might not seem different in economy or urbanization, but Danny sees a modicum of differences between the two places.

The accents and phrasing are the things that Danny notices, since Danny grew up in New Jersey, he’s got the Newark dialect to the very fibrous chord in his voice box, but its pattered out with his time spent in New York.

The food also is different, people may not see it, but New York seems to have a shortage of good food. Almost all the food goes on a spectrum of unhealthy toxic waste to flax seed and tofu salad rabbit food. There's no variety for the middle. Nothing in between. It's a shame there weren't plenty of places like that around for him to enjoy.

New York is also way too crowded for Danny’s liking. If Danny takes one turn, he bumps into someone, and if he does again, he'll bumps into someone else. The whole thing just leads to angry glares and heated swear words. No one seems to give him the space he needs while he wants to walk the streets. It may be the main reason that Danny goes off to the park often, where the masses of people tend to patter off and wane.

New York didn’t seem anything like New Jersey, well at least in Danny’s opinion. It was a good start for Danny’s life, something new to begin his journey, if you wanted to be dramatic about it, and Danny was surely dramatic when it came to that kind of trope of finding oneself. I guess to him he just wanted a different feel of his city. He didn't want to drastically move to a different place, he loved New Jersey, it was his home for a while after all. But he did need to get away with the people there, his family. New Jersey reminded him too much of the loss and pain he went through with them.

He found New York, and it seems like life is just a little bit better for him here.

On one of his first duties of moving to New York after getting his small apartment setup, he'd decided late in the afternoon that he should walk around to get to know the big apple a little bit better. A 6 oclock stroll never hurt anybody.

A few hours of aimlessly walking seemed like it was a good idea at the time, but now that Danny walked around the same area twice and thrice times he finally admitted that he was legitimately lost and scared, and regretted ever thinking this was a good idea.

Walking around a little more for a few minutes to see if he could retrace his steps, Danny had concluded that he was hungry and his knee was going to give out if he didn't stop walking now. So he stopped by at a local food vendor area, thinking he'd be able to find something to eat there.

As Danny's stomach grumbled loudly, passing by a fruit stand, he suddenly appealed to the idea that a bunch of apples would have sufficed his appetite.

But his nose scented something with herbs and spices. He smelt the sweet combination of cheese and tomatoes and the vaguest smell of pepper on top. It delighted his nostrils at the smell, filling him with a nostalgic feeling. He went into the maze of food stalls and came across a big cedar table, filled with a bunch of food Danny hadn’t eaten since he was 8 yrs. old, when his parents, (for the first and last time) had decided to go on vacation to Italy in Milan.

“It gets to me sometimes too,” a voice said sighing in sympathy. “Food is just amazing; so you want to try our sample of focaccia? We make it ourselves.”

Danny nodded before he could think better of it. He takes the bread sample and the salt and herbs explode in his mouth. Danny never thought bread could taste so damn good on its own. He's been left with the delusion that you'd always need to compliment it with something nice like sauced chicken or soup. He was wrong. This bread feels like an entire course all in itself.

Granted, Danny may just be talking through his stomach, but he couldn't deny the fact that he's never had bread that tasted so good on its own.

“Hey, if you don't mind asking, where the heck am I?” Danny asks as he stuffs another piece of bread in his mouth.

“You’re at New York of course,” one of the guys says, making the other man laugh in the corner, where he's talking to another group of people selling them a bouquet of baguettes'

Danny would reprimand them that he is actually lost, and he has no idea how to get home, when guy that recently laughed says “you’re in downtown 3rd street.”

“Ugh, thanks.” Danny mumbles out.

“My names Gadini, would you care to buy our pasta noodles?” The guy says to him. Danny feels like he's being bargained for and it surprises him that he's actually going to fall for it. He can't spend too much on his first month in New York, he can't already spend all his money from his new job as a novice chef in New York.

The man brings out his hand to shake, Danny takes it skeptically. He can't trust these guys too much otherwise he'll end up actually using the money.

“We have great homegrown tomatoes. We also know how to make a mean tiramisu, and my name is Giuseppe.” His callused hands reach over for Danny’s shoulder, pushing his stomach to think and not his brain. He's tired and hungry and he really wants to eat some delicious pasta when he gets home.

“I really shouldn’t.” Danny is totally lying right now; he is dying for some Italian cuisine in this concrete jungle of a city. Danny at the time was too new to New York to really have the know in on the best Italian foods. But one whiff from all the food made Danny’s mouth water, it had the real milieu of Italy right at its core.

“It’s no problem, really come on. I’ll give you good deal.” Danny was doomed right after the introduction was made.

Danny had bought nearly 30 pounds of food from Gadini’s and Giuseppe’s store, totally in fear that he has to lug this all the way home. Danny tries his hardest to move, but his knee is killing him as he tries to walk out towards the general direction of his place.

“You need help their, friend?”

“No… it’s just I didn’t come here with a car and my house is an hour walk from 3rd, at least that's what I'm guesstimating right now.”

"The man gave a big laugh at that, obviously not realizing Danny was being serious. His face fell down into a angry look. "Are you brain dead? Why would you come here without a car? You should have told us before we made you spend it.”

Danny gives them a sheepish shrug, he’s too embarrassed to come out with words to explain he can't really say no to such good food. Even at being a new chef, he knew quality food when he saw it. Danny got too caught up in making a delicious pasta and pizza pie to go on the side, that he clearly over sighted that he'd need a ride to get home to make such delicacies.

He hasn't exactly bought a car yet, he'd been saving up for one after a few years living here.

“Hey, hey. It’s no problem; we can just drive the boy home.” Guiseppe said.

“It’s okay really. I can walk. Or I can take a cab... shit," Danny says, realizing he doesn't have enough for a cab ride to his house. Shit, he's really dug himself a hole this time.

“No, no, no," Gadini said exasperated again at Danny’s refusal, shaking his head. “You can't walk around in New York at this time with that much food in your hands."

“You’re walking with a bad knee, boy,” Giuseppe snips out into the conversation. It's strange how they both talk, it feels like he’s talking to one person and not two people, which is slightly unnerving to Danny.

“How’d you know…”

“He’s only 39."

“Yeah, doesn't mean I’m senile yet.” Giuseppe says, pointing at his head.

“Come on, come on, we’ll take you to our car. It’s not very far from here. Can you wait for a bit while we take down the place?”

So Danny waited.

He'd generously accepted the offer after a reconsideration and decided, after much thought that he shouldn't seem so reluctant, that he genuinely did trust these guys.

Danny followed them to their car once they set down the place and told a middle aged women to take care of the rest of the haul in a small basket. She'd thanked them and said goodbye with a kiss to each of their cheeks.

“Sweet ride,” Danny whistles. It's a new Audi A4 model.

“You like? I've got a knack for collecting a nice ride. I've got a 1974 Mercury Marquis in my garage along with Chevy Impala.

“Stop oogling at the car. Are we going to get in or not? And stop talking about the piece of craps. Those cars can barely run a mile before it sputters out."

“Ohkay, ohkay were getting in.” Giuseppe clicks open the door and pantomimes opening the shotgun door for Gadini. "Happy, princess?"

“Don’t mock me.”

“Just get in the car you pain in the ass.” Gadini gets in the car and sticks his tongue out at the man who opened it for him, a sly smirk on his face.

Danny gets in the backseat of the car after he's placed all the food in the trunk that Guiseppe had opened.

He’s kind of feeling a bit like a third wheel, which should be strange for Danny since these are strangers to him he should feel like a third wheel or maybe more like a fifth wheel. Danny eyes them strangely, noticing for a second how much they touch each other. How at ease they are with one another and the way they can basically read each other’s thoughts and finish their sentences.

“Wait so when you meant our car you meant-“

“We meant that it is our car, as in we share it.”

“So you guys are…” Danny quieted at not wanting to jump to conclusions.

“Married, no.”

Danny kind of felt embarrassed now; he must have offended them because it suddenly becomes quiet. “I just thought-“

“We are engaged though, and when it is legal to marry him,” He takes one hand off the steering wheel to hold Gadini’s hand in the car, “I will.”

“You have a problem with that?” Gadini stares critically at Danny whos' in the back of the car. Danny feels like if he says the wrong thing he'll get kicked out the car in an instant, and get hit by oncoming traffic.

“No, nope. I’m just like you guys. Except for the whole partner thing. Not really into relationships at the moment.”

His eyes soften a bit and his mouth curls into a smile. “I thought so.” Guiseppe gave a nod.

"Okay so you guessed right. Whatever. Doesn't prove you have a gaydar."

“Ignore him, please. Don’t worry, Danny love will come. It happens when you least expect it,” Gadini says slightly squeezing the hand on his.

“He’s right,” Giuseppe says, turning to look away at the road and smiling at Gadini for a bit.

Danny gives a sardonic smile to that. “Sure,” was his only response to their affection.

"You can turn on this street."

And from then, Danny, would be a regular visitor to Gadini’s and Giuseppe’s little cedar stall.

Danny unconsciously always go to them for advice, for food, teaching Danny how to 'properly' cook and bake some of the Italian food he made. They'd always tell him that he cooks like he's a doctor readying an operation. There's no love or desire for the cooking, just a simple need to feed a hunger. He's learned a lot about cooking from them more than his books have taught him, and maybe that's part of the reason for his success. He enjoys cooking now more so than he did in culinary school.

So when Danny had been given the money to start his restaurant it became very clear to Danny that he'd also go to Gad and Gus for their help in making a decent Italian restaurant for him. They both planned out a bunch of the recipes and would sometimes come in to eat and dine their or, very rarely, cook as one of the chefs when Danny was understaffed for a big event.

Danny also has learnt to be very dependent on them in other ways besides cooking. He's spent many nights on their couch or a quick reassurance from them when he’s feeling a little to stressed about his relationships or just his life in general. It's nice knowing that when he sits on their couch and sleeps for an hour or so, he'll wake up to either of them cooking a mighty fine meal to make him feel better. It's nice to know that they're also someone he's as close to as he is with Rachel.

And over the years they've compacted 12 years of what might have been Danny’s only happy years.

He's spent 18 years being abused by a family that's hated him and isolated him for who he was.

2 years working to be a cop only to be outed by his peers and booted out of the academy the next day.

He's spent 3 years building a culinary career and in the beginning of those years, he's finally learning how to be a good chef by meeting these men.

Along with the time spent with Rachel, those that he shared with Gadini and Guiseppe were his most profound and cherished memories. Danny is glad and grateful that he's met these awesome people in his life. It's something that he can also look back on and check off on his list of things that he's proud about. He's really proud about it.

 

\------------------Present Day---------------------------

 

It's a few days later that Kono comes up to him with a jab to his shoulder.

"Oww! What the hell was that for?" Danny's says petting his sore arm, he's learned the hard way that you can't really blame it when Kono punches you, because chances are you probably deserved it.

"That's for being a secretive bastard and not telling me you got Rachel pregnant with your weird test-tube baby. This-" Kono said bringing up a hand to his face, which made him flinch, thinking it was going to be a deadly uppercut to his jaw "-It's a piece of paper Danny. I'm not hitting you again."

Danny opened his eyes slowly to be met with a piece of paper in front of his face that read: Kamekona's Single Parents and Proud. Or, using the acronymed version, KSPP.

"Single Parents? Why?"

"Yup, and you're going. Just think about it Danny. It'll be a place for you to get help for being a single parent and find guidance on childhood raising, and its a good community of people for you and your kid if you stick too it. It'll be something good for you, I promise."

"Kono, I don't know. I might not have time for it."

"They have a flexible schedule. Just go to one meeting, please.

"Thank you..." Danny's says with a warm smile on his face, accepting the piece of paper. The affection doesn't last very long as he gets sucker punched in the gut.

"That's for flinching," Kono says sweetly as she goes back into the kitchen.

 

—————————————————————-

Danny had hailed a cab and told the driver where they were going, still feeling the some of the ire of having his car stolen. He also was somewhat grateful that no tall, devilishly handsome, menace had come through bustling his door trying to steal his cabbie. The car ride was smooth sailing for him to go towards the address Kono had written down on the piece of paper.

Danny nearly did a double back as he looked at the house that the cab driver stopped at.

Apparently Kono’s friend is some sort of millionaire, because the location that he is driven to is a hill top mansion. Danny pays the cab driver and gets out of the cab to walk towards the white ivory door of the huge house.

Danny whistles in appreciation at the size of the house. The front of the house, as he walked by, has an arch of coloumns that holds a tiny roof for the handcrafted double-doors. The entire walls around the doors have vines littered with tiny leaves that they even block some of the windows. The place is just a massive expanse of a white box that it nearly hurts Danny's eyes.

Once Danny's at the ivory doors, he gently knocks on it, before he actually spots the doorbell to ring from all the white.

When the door opened he was not expecting to see Dr. Kelly opening it for him.

Confused, Danny tilted his head “Dr. Kelly? What are you doing here?”

“Danny I’m glad you could make it,” Dr. Kelly patted on the back. “It is Danny right? And just call me Chin outside of the clinic, brah."

“Okay, Chin, its ugh great to see you man. So you started the group? This is your house?" Danny had an inkling of a feeling that the man owning the house was named Kamekona. Maybe its a last name, Danny had thought.

“Nah too glamorous for me. It's the owners, Kamekona. I'm just the unofficial doorman.”

“So then why are you here? Other than being a doorman, that is.”

“I’m a single parent too, my wife died when she gave birth.”

“That’s awful man. Shit.” It felt way too quick for things to become awkward between them. “I’m sorry, ” Danny said weakly, not knowing what to do in this situation.

Chin shook his head. “No, I should say sorry, putting you on the spot and all. Come on lets go." Chin leads Danny inside the huge house.

“Thanks. And just my... condolences for you."

“I hear you, brah. So how’s Rachel? She doing fine?” Chin easily forgetting the last bits of their conversation. It seems nearly practiced and that pains Danny's heart. But Danny forgets about the whole situation for privacy sake. He won't pry too much.

“Yeah," Danny nodded. "The only thing that's bad is that she's kind of bummed that she can’t take her tennis lessons anymore. But she’s decided she’d take knitting lessons instead, said she was going to knit the baby yarn wigs.”

Chin laughed with a shake of his head. “She’s a strange one for sure.”

Danny could only nod again in agreement.

Chin led him into a hall that seemed to hold thousands of other doors - man was the house huge. When Chin stopped, and turned into a room that was filled with people eating and lounging around.

The room was spacious and had a fireplace crackling slightly in the corner of the room. The room had brown hardwood flooring on one step and on the next it held white soft carpeting. It had 4 couches centered on a fine, decadent black-wood coffee table that held an array of snacks and appetizers.

It reminds him too much of his old house for some reason. Danny knows for a fact that the Williams estate was at least 2 times larger than this house. But it still reminds him of the decadence and the luxury of the rich.

But the place also doesn't remind him of his house. What the place lacks in size surely makes up for the decorating for sure. All the furniture and appliances are more modern and expensive, but they're worn out, used, holding a sense that actual people live in this house. A sense that felt a lot like family. It was like each room or hallway told a story or a tale that usually ended in children saying sorry, or smiling and giggling. It didn't remind him of his house as he looked deeper into the place, as saw the art work displayed around the room, instead of million dollar paintings, finger prints of children's hands legitimately painted on the finely painted walls, or the black coffee table to be filled with children's toys and drawing books underneath it, where you would normally expect Vogue or Dior magazines to be. Danny saw that this place really was family oriented and not at all sophisticated spacing. It was such a relief.

Danny’s house was more the opposite on this notion. It was very old fashioned and way too neat, almost everything was polished to the point it was blinding. And walking down the halls made you fear each step, not skip too each step. It felt like there was so much room in the house and not enough of that family sense to fill it, that it became hollow. No part of Danny's house compared to a square foot of what this house had.

“Yeah it’s big,” Chin said, knocking Danny out of his reverie on his contrasting.

Chin looked like he was about to say more when a big man entered the room and everyone else quieted down as a big bellied man walked into the room. He wore a tacky floral lei shirt and had a tie around his neck, which seemed to show no purpose then to act like a noose around his neck because he left the shirt open, and exposed white tank top he wore. From the waist down the man had the fanciest pairs of pants that Danny knew where tailored for him, and had brown loafers that went well with the pants. The man looked horribly mismatched and Danny wasn't willing to accept that the man had willingly worn this fashion disaster of an outfit.

“Welcome to Kamekona' Single parents and proud," said the big man as he came over to the corner, near the fire place, where a giant rocking chair was placed. It gave him the essence of a bald hawaiian Santa Clause.

“As you can see we are all family here, we all share the same goal; to raise our children in da kine. In the world of freedom, respect and honour of being alone in your partaking of parenthood. We as single parents do not have an oven partner or a baster partner. We make our own babies, and we are proud.” Kamekona made a loud reverberating noise that worried Danny when he fist-bumped his chest with. “We would also like to welcome are newest member to our little island society, everyone say aloha to Danny.”

Danny got a chorus of ‘Alohas! Aloha Danny!’

“Ummm... Aloha to you, too?” Everyone just laughs at his response.

“So do you already have a kid or…?” One of the moms ask.

“Oh, I just had my best friend… was fertilized with the egg a few days ago.” He hoped it didn’t sound too strange, but when other parents nodded at him, he didn’t feel that much like a pariah.

“Well Danny we here at single parents and proud are going to help you with all your problems, think of us as your Ohana.”

Danny raised his eyebrows trying to find where that familiar word came from.

“It means family,” Chin informed Danny.

“Oh, from that movie with the blue alien?” Danny knows this because hes' seen DVD episodes of it with Sarah and Benny.

Everyone laughed again. He was really starting to think that he might be the pariah after all.

“No, not the movie, well, yah, it does mean- that’s not the point.” Kamekona said as he rubbed his head in thought. “The point is that once you are done with the welcoming, you will always be a part of this family. No one gets left behind because we are connected in other ways besides blood. We are a pact of people meant to support one another when we don't have significant others to do that.”

Danny's heart warms at the sentiment, he clears his thoughts, and speaks. "So does that mean I’m in?” Danny says waving his hands in all general directions. "I don't really know what I'm doing."

“It’s a little more complicated then that. Will have a ceremony for you, where you will be spirit guided by our great Haumea.”

Danny eyes widen slightly at the news. Haumea?

Danny gulped as he said: “So you guys are a cult?”

“No, no, no, we are not pagans. We simply see it as a way of initiation, well for our Hawaiian culture. Nothing strange, brah. It's just a small initiative that we appreciate you willingly participating in.”

Now that Kamekona mentioned it nearly half of the people were Hawaiians like Kono and Chin. A few were white and a couple were Indian and Hispanic, probably were natives in Hawaii, before they moved here since almost all of them seemed to talk in clicks and pidgin.

“Okay, so Haumea is like your... God? Concept? Idea?”

“She is a Goddess. She will be your guide to the wonders of childhood.”

“So when exactly is that gonna start?” asked Danny, slightly scared to know if it was gonna happen now. It was kind of an understatement to say Danny was a bit culture shocked.

“It will be when you know you for sure you have baby. The ritual will soon happen after that, where you then be spirit guided!” Kamekona for some reason yells the last part again, shaking his hands rigorously above his head.

Forget Kono’s trust, Danny thought. He has an inkling of a feeling he’ll be regretting coming to this place soon. Very soon.

He suddenly becomes the main attention by the entire group. Everyone seated giving him different sets of smile or little hand waves. Danny tries his best to send a friendly aura.

“Group hug!’” One of the dads' say randomly on the couch, when Kamekona nodded everyone came up to Danny and surrounded him, hugging Danny in a big, strange circular hug . It was so out of place that it surprised Danny for a few seconds. He hugged back, so that he didn’t seem rude.

But to be honest it was kind of nice, weird, yet nice.

 

\------------------------------------------------

 

For no reason what's so ever other than Rachel just being Rachel, joins them for the food ride Danny set out to do today, she seems to have appeared out of thin are suddenly squished in between Danny and Kono, in the cab of the food van Danny leaves parked away in the alleyway garage. He's used it for the simple purpose of buying ingredients in great abundance when he's running out or when he's doing a catering job and needs to deliver food and equipment needed for the events.

Danny is using the white mini van with the Desdemona symbol emblazoned on its sides to buy food from Gads and Gus place.

"I really don't get why you have to come with us."

"What? Do I need a reason to meet with my best friend?"

"No, not really. I'm just asking specifically why now do you want to hang out now. Don't you have kids to take care of?"

"I want to see Gadini and Guiseppe again."

"You saw them yesterday, at the party you threw, when they came back. Try again."

"Ugh, fine. There's this new muffin place there that I wanted to try. Plus Benny and Sarah are off on a kids only birthday this saturday. I'm all alone in the house and I really am craving food."

"I don't think you can have cravings this early. It's only been 2 weeks."

"All that is relative to the women who is pregnant. I had my first cravings when I was just 7 day's pregnant."

"Is that when you decided to eat Martha's cake all by yourself at her reception party?"

"It was a damn fruit cake for godsakes. I can't believe anyone would have fruit cake in their reception party."

"I can't believe you nearly ate half the fruit cake," Kono giggled on at Rachel's story.

"Ugh, don't remind me. Cravings are the worst. Except for this particular craving of banana nut muffins. Your baby has good taste," Rachel said, giving Danny some sort of a respectful nod. Danny grimaces at her.

"Thanks."

The car ride is fairly silent after that. Buying fresh ingredients for his restaurant is something that Danny prides himself with, he doesn't like to buy or use any of that preserved, cheap shit all the other restaurants seem to use. It's degrading for his status as a chef to serve his customers the slob he bought at the new vendor place he got them from. It was a total oversight Danny hates himself for.

Danny may eat greasy food, but at least not in gluttonous amounts. He's taken boxing sessions and daily workout routines. For him, it all adds up to a fairly decent amount of muscle and a healthy body regime. But many people don’t seem to share Danny’s idiosyncrasies, so its Danny’s job to give them food that doesn’t come out of a grease tar pit or costs a fortune for a morsel of an amount. It's food that people can actually enjoy and feel full and sated by.

Today he's finally able to get some decent ingredients for this months supply. It's terrible how much Danny relied on just this particular food stall for his supply when he knows he should have a backup for when they inexplicably decided to leave for a vacation for an entire 2 months.

Once they make their way to parking lot, they all get out and Danny hauls the huge food basket on wheels they use to gather their food. It's a ridiculous thing, how big it is, but its efficient enough that all Danny has to do is just but green boxes filled with food and put it on the ramp and their good with restocking a bit of food. It's really a random buy that Danny doesn't know how he ever got the hands of. He just saw it on the store and strapped it to the top of his car. It looked like a giant pallet with wheels on the bottom and had giant steel bars that sprouted at the edges of it and acted like a cage bar for the dam thing with a mini handle bar to maneuver the object around.

Rachel's eyes light up with hunger as she starts walking before them to the muffin place she's been talking about just as Danny sets up the the giant food basket on wheels.

"Hey," Danny calls out to her. "First we go get my food."

“Oh for shame, Daniel.” She says exaggeratedly, clasping her stomach dramatically. “Why must you be so cruel? I’m craving, Daniel. Would you really deny the baby what it wants?”

“You don’t even know for sure you’re pregnant.” Danny retorts what Rachel’s been telling him for the past day. "And I'm pretty sure my kid can wait a few hours before they can eat."

“Who are you, doctor Oz?” Rachel retorts back. “Fine, let’s just go get the damn veggies and meat."

This supermarket is familiar to Danny as the back of his hand. He’s walked on these stones path ways hundreds of times. Something that for once in Danny’s life is familiar and comforting. They keep walking until they see two figures Danny has been known for ever since he turned 22 and moved to New York with Rachel. It reminds him all too much of the time he walked these steps for the first time, utterly lost and needing some guidance to get to his house.

It hasn’t changed, much, since the last 12 years of Danny’s life in New York when he walks to the stalls.

“Danny boy! Handsome as ever,” Gadini says when Danny walks towards them. His smile so wide it splits his face. His skin is a lot more tanner than before. His eyes are creased with more crows feet and his hair is now longer than ever, curled up in a short manner.

The stalls are filled with meats, some cheese, (that Danny for the life of him will never buy, he's learned from experience. Gadini and Guiseppe can't make decent cheese for the life of them) a few vegetables, ripe tomatoes, spices, dry pasta noodles and a plethora of other fine food. “Kono! Rachel! Beautiful as always, it’s so good to see you. How you are doing?”

Kono and Rachel blush slightly. There’s nothing like a 50 something yr. old guy of a flatterer to make two strong-willed women blush like saints.

“Gadini you’re such a flatterer.”

“We’re doing well.” Kono shyly grins.

“Gadini, Giuseppe my two favourite people in the world, how’s it going? You're still tan from Venice.” Danny is totally unfazed by their flattery; he’s known them too long for it to work anymore.

“Good, good,” Giuseppe’s nods. “Danny you miss business don't you?” He says with a thickened accent. Guiseppes black hair is now fully buzzed out. He nearly seems bald except for a peppering of black and grey hair growing on the top of his head.

"Yes. Obviously. I'm ruined without your help as my biggest food stockers. I'd be helpless."

"Such a damn flatterer you are," Gadini says sarcastically. 

"Learned from the best."

“So what is it you need, Danny? I have good price for cheese, why you no buy my cheese?"

“No offence Gadini but your cheese is… pretty bad” Danny murmurs the rest of the words.

“Don’t you disrespect my cheese, boy,” but he says it with a smile. “I didn’t start your restaurant for no respect from you.”

“Don’t listen to him, Danny. Come on you need tomatoes, right? You making the recipe again? We can stock you up on tomatoes, sea salt, bread, garlic and herbs and spices we bought in bulk while we stayed at Venice."

“Yeah that'll be great start. I've got to resupply those and some ground pork and beef tenders." He points towards the cold meats and picks nearly 30 packs of them.

“Ohkay, ohkay. Who are you cooking for? Yourself? You need more than a few! You need more, more! more, your customers gotta manja manja.” Danny feels as though they've delved back into their Italian roots by staying there too long, it reminds them of when they were younger back then. It's always amazed how much food they store in their portable storage unit they keep chain linked to their car. They've also got a nice supply of pasta noodles that he's buying in bulk, too.

All of it placed neatly in the giant storage bag on wheels.

Once Danny got all the ingredients on his checklist, and said there goodbyes to Gadini and Giuseppe stall, promising them come back soon and meet them for lunch tomorrow, too. He doesn’t directly tell them about Rachel is having his baby. Danny won’t say anything to them until he’s one hundred percent sure. Rachel and Kono seemed to have picked up on the omission and haven't said much about it, except give Danny hard stares.

Rachel hurries them over to the muffin stand that she has become associated with for some reason. She has been talking nonstop about its banana nut muffins, and surprisingly stated they also sold malasadas'. This had the desired effect of piquing both Danny and Kono’s curiosity now.

So when Danny takes his first bite of a tiny warm banana nut muffin and it melts in his mouth. The light fluffy texture, with the added crunchiness from the nuts, makes for a perfect tandem of flavour that nearly takes his socks off. He also tries a carrot muffin topped with cream cheese icing so smooth it melts in Danny's mouth.

“Wow.”

“I know.” Danny nods at Kono's moan.

“These taste like there straight from the homeland,” Kono says in amazement as she eats her malasada.

“Are you gonna pay for those or not? They're not free samples," the cashier for the muffin store says, her hands on her hips, giving a disapproving look.

“Blame her.” Danny says pointing to Rachel whose hovering said muffin samples.

“What?” Rachel shrugs. “I can’t help it if I’m having feelings to crave.”

“Not this again,” Danny replies flatly.

“Yes this again, and it’s my body. I get to choose what I feel and can’t feel.”

“Tell me that when you’re giving birth.”

Kono giggles at them.

Rachel rolls her eyes at him. "I've learned a few things now and I know for a fact that I'm going to have an epidural for when the baby comes."

"Still have to go through the contractions for a while. Plus I thought you hated the feeling of being numb."

“Okay fine,” Rachel says poking Danny in the cheeks to annoy him. “But I get to hold your hand really tight until it bleeds when that happens. I've struggled through pregnancy and you will feel my pain."

“Fair enough,” Danny says as best he can with two fingers poking on his cheek.

"You will feel the pain of pregnancy my friend," Rachel says all ominously, almost like she's predicting it.

“Are you gonna buy anything?” The cashier squeaks in again to their conversation. She seems bored and not at all understanding their conversation as she looks confusingly at them.

Danny turns to look at the brown haired cashier, giving an apologetic smile. The girl has that classy type of pretty, all natural and coy, but she also radiates off a confidence that Danny wished he possessed.

So Danny does the safe thing and answers her. “She’ll have half a dozen banana nuts, and I’ll have half a dozen of those malasadas and 2 of those carrot cakes.”

“Alright,” the cashier says, prepping a box for their order.

When she hands the box to Danny, Rachel grabs for it instead, leaving Danny to pay for it.

“Yum.” Rachel pipes in eating an entire muffin in half.

“Hey, brah, what else do we need?” Kono asks when she hefts a large bag full of fine pasta noodles over her back. She may look frail, but in truth she’s stronger then she looks.

“I think that’s it except for the cheese, does this place have a cheese station?”

“Oh, my friend opened up their cheese station down the road just 2 days ago,” the cashier points to a vague direction down the stalls, “you can’t miss it. He makes really good cheese by the way, you'll love it.” The cashier said like that was all the directions they really needed.

“Great let’s go,” Danny says, as he pushes the boxes of food around in the giant basket.

“Ugh, but I’m tired.” Rachel cried out petulantly.

“You’re not even carrying anything.”

“Look at these muffins I'm carrying. They’re reeeeallly heeeavvy,” Rachel drawls the last two words.

“What are you 5?” Danny has said this many times since they met, and not once has he ever gotten a proper response from Rachel. “I don’t even know why you suggested to give me a child, when you already are my kid.”

“You're a terrible father. But fine, lets go to the stupid cheese place."

“Just go eat your banana nut muffins, sweet heart, you can complain later in the car.”

“She said it was here, right?” Kono asked as she looked around. “You think she got it wrong? I don't see a cheese station anywhere. Nothing here but veggies.”

“Mayb-” Danny gave a frown. When he sees Rachel isn’t with them anymore. “Where did she go? I swear she really is my kid.”

Kono gave a huff of a laugh at that.

After a few seconds of looking around the place he hears Kono say “I think I saw her over there,” she points to a corner where a pineapple stall is placed.

Danny gave an even bigger frown to the pineapples. Both Kono and him walk over to the stall looking or hearing for a posh accent o short, curly brown hair. “Ugh, who eats these?” Danny says grabbing a pineapple from the stall that they've reached.

“Lots of people eat pineapples, sir. Have loads of vitamin C, and great for your digestive track,” a voice said to him behind the pineapple stand, a mans voice, who's face is blocked by the stand behind him, but the voice a searing reminder in his head.

Danny drops the pineapple like it was on fire.

“Hey, I heard you drop that. If that’s bruised you’re gonna be paying for that, sir-… Danny?” Steve said as he came over from the other side of the stand, getting a good look at his surprised face.

“Steve…”

“How’d you know I worked here.”

“That’s-um, great-wait-Huh?”

“Are you following me?” Steve outright says, looking all the bit too pleased about that fact.

“What, no!” Danny makes an indignant face to the amused one that’s playing on Steve’s face. “I was not stalking you, okay. There was no stalking going on here.”

“So you came to the one supermarket that I was in, out of the thousands in the city, to this exact stall, where I work.” Steve said raising his eyebrows in a gesture that said ‘need I go on?.’ ” I dunno, Danno, seems pretty farfetched to me.”

“Listen to me here, Steven- I know that you like getting your ego stroked, but I am a civilized man, and in under no circumstances would I succumb to stalking you.” Danny begins to poke him in the chest. It seems to be the thing that Danny does when he's near Steve. “I only came here to get cheese. I always go here, okay. I am a daily visitor to this Market, Steve. I am not a stalker. I was just here mocking the pineapple’s, when you came along.

“Alright Danno whatever you say.” Steve says, his mouth tinged with a sneaky smile.

"Don’t call me that! Okay? I was just here eating my malasadas, when you came in, told me useless facts about the pineapples and accused me of stalking you!” Danny fumed as he reiterated what actually happened. He was not going to let the mirth of Steve McGarrett ruin his day. Again.

“You know I never really got your last name,” Steve says ignoring, Danny’s diatribe. A knowing smirk growing on his face at what that would mean if Danny told him. They'd be friends if he knew it. No. He was not going to befriend Steven McGarrett for the ever loving life of him. So instead of speaking to him, Danny just stared at Steve like you would at a person who was insane, which, in this case was actually happening, because honestly Steve really was crazy for wanting to know him.

And for himself wanting to know this guy, too. So maybe they both were crazy.

“I’m not gonna tell you, babe. Never. Nada. Not gonna happen in a million years.” He says rather triumphantly.

“His full name is Daniel Mave Williams.” Rachel's voice says casually as she pops into the conversation.

“Mave?” Steve asks confused.

"Don't tell him that." Danny whispered hotly at her.

“It means the ‘drunk one’ in Irish.” Rachel says with a snort.

“You come back at the worst of times,” Danny says defensively. "We we're looking for you when you got lost now you should leave again."

“I wasn’t lost, Daniel. I was just looking ahead for the cheese station, guess you beat me there.” Rachel gives a cursory glance to Steve and then to Danny. “So is this the guy Kono's told me about-”

“Sorry! My friend here is kind of brain dead.” Danny quickly announces, as he covers Rachel’s mouth with his hands. He doesn’t want Rachel spewing his secrets. And for Steve to know more about him, than any normal stranger should know about.

“So, um what types of cheese’s have you got? Danny asks, changing the subject while his hand still clasped to Rachel’s mouth like its normal, which for Danny is scarily true. Rachel’s only annoyance to the hand on her mouth is that she can’t seem to eat her muffins, or that’s Danny guess as she eyes her half eaten banana nut hungrily.

Steve looks at them weirdly, until he hears Danny talk about cheese and immediately his expression turns excited.

“Oh, ugh, right cheese.” Steve says awkwardly. “Well, um, these are the basic Chevre. This is the cheese that started it all, and it’s one of our most popular cheese,” Steve says pointing to a white creamy looking fromage. Danny thinks would go good with some baked crackers, drizzled with olive oil and topped with basil. “Over here are the surface ripened cheeses, Steve says gesturing to the orang-ish yellow cheese. “And this on- This is really boring isn’t it?

“No, I’m a chef, ergo this is somewhat intriguing.” Danny mentally curses himself for giving out more information to Steve.”

“Ergo?” Steve says beaming at him. Danny has never felt so validated from using such a pretentious word.

“Hey, I told you to not mock my words.”

“No, it’s boring,” Rachel states when Danny lets go of his hand to look at the all the other cheeses Steve suggests.

“Can I get those in a box?” Danny points to the Chevre, ignoring Rachel.

“Yeah, alright,” Steve says with another smile. God, what Danny wouldn’t do for another smile directed at him. “Chin get a box of Chevre out for me.” At that moment Kono’s head pops up from looking at the cheese.

“Cuz?”

“Chin?”

Because of course Chins not only Rachel’s gynecologist, is second head for Single Parents and Proud, but he also sells cheese as a side job. This guy has lived a damn full life.

“Dr. Kelly?” Rachel said when Chin gets out from behind the tarp of the tent wall.

“Oh hey Rachel, Danny and… Kono! Aloha cousin!”

“Aloha! Give me a hug, cuz.” Kono says raising her arms.

Chin and Kono hug each other over the table of cheeses. Everyone raises their eyebrows at the way the cousins seem to drift into a totally different atmosphere. Talking to each other in that fast paced alien language that Danny heard Kamekona and Chin speak in at the other council meetings. Steve seems to somehow understand because he replies for Chin sometimes, and gets a rise out of Kono too.

It all feels so jovial for Danny.

So they end up staying there at the cheese station for 30 minutes more than Danny would have liked, well if he didn’t have Steve to talk to, he would have hated it more. It's a good thing he's placed a few ice bins for the meet.

Steve scratches the nape of his neck. The movement makes his shoulder goes up and Danny sees a nice glance at the tattoos on his arms. “So, um.”

Danny ears perk up to that, because he knows what comes after those words its:

“Where still on for tonight, right Steve?” The cashier from the muffin stand from before says, she grasps Steve’s bicep and looks at him with big doe eyes. Danny hadn't seen her come at all, too busy looking at Steve to really pay attention to his surroundings.

Fuck.

Steve sighs, “Oh… yeah. I’ll see you then, Catherine.”

“Great. This is going to be a fun night.” She says it to Steve rather ambiguously. She pats him on the bicep one more time before walking out and giving Danny a quick smile. Danny knows that she directed it at him. He knows. And he seriously hates the girl for her damn knowing smirk.

And this is where the universe tells him that it was all a joke. That he should never really hope for good things to come, and be so open with others. Its things like that that’ll make mistakes so much worse to handle. He doesn’t need any more of this taunting if life is just going to dangle a prize in front of Danny nose, and reel it back in when he gets to close.

Danny should know by now to not ever even acknowledge the fucking prize.

After that, the small conversations with Steve and Danny seem to stop. Even Rachel doesn’t get a rise out of him when she eats one of the cheeses and spits it out. Not even a single line about respecting the marvels of cheese.

Steve looks like he wanted to say more, but Danny doesn’t give him the chance. He’s not letting this asshole turn it around no matter how much Danny thinks that Steve wants him instead.

So he says his goodbyes curtly. Leaving the stalls in a quick dash.

He and Rachel push the massive cart along with Kono's own cart and place it in the van.

Kono said that she would be staying for a little longer, telling us she'd get a ride with Chin.

She wanted to talk more with her cousin, who he hasn’t in months. Danny had nodded to her and told her to come by the restaurant for her late night shift to bartend.  
Danny and Rachel get inside of the car, he turns the ignition to the car and head’s back to his house.

The drive is fairly quiet to the restaurant.

And when they put everything in the storage room and fridge, Rachel doesn't complain, it's all too quiet.

When they get into the car again the drive home to Rachel's house is also quiet. There's no silly banter or mild chit chatter about today’s events. It’s the first quiet drive they’ve had in years.

When Danny drops Rachel off to her apartment, Danny unlocks the for her, handing her the bag of muffins Benny and Sara will love.

“You okay? You’re too quiet,” Rachel whispers out from where she is on the cold stone steps.

“Let’s just not talk about it.” Danny says quickly. "It was a stupid crush."

“Was it about the cheese guy?”

“Nevermind about who it was. Doesn't matter really. He's got a hot date with someone else.”

“You shouldn’t let it get to you like that, Daniel,” she coo’s gently. "Steve's just another boring bloke. He's not much of worthy guy for you."

Danny closes the door, and yelled out his last message from the car door window. “I said we should stop talking about it. This isn’t stopping.”

Danny knows that she’s giving the him the dagger eyes, he can feel them. “Okay, forget I asked.” Rachel yells out to Danny as she searches for her key. Danny can hear her stomp off to her apartment complex. “But we’re talking about this later!” She yells, because Rachel is a restless woman as she takes the stairs to her huge apartment loft.

After he drives Rachel off, he does his normal nightly routine. Consisting of putting the food he bought for his fridge and making a light snack for himself with it. He takes a shower, and puts on sweat pants and a white-T.

He settles on to bed, his thoughts a constant mess and he's feeling restless that he can't properly sleep later in the night.

It's just like the first time, but somewhat worse for Danny. 

And as of now it's the second time that he can’t get Steve out of his thoughts.


	5. Fiteen's A Nicer Number

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meep. Stayed up way too long to update this thing. Seems like I'm only capable of writing when i'm drunk on pumpkin spice lattes at 2 in the morning.

“So he takes my cab, has the gall to blame me for it, stalks me out, and then tells me to pick up a dirty penny.”

“That’s so romantic!” Amy says dramatically.

“It totally is,” Danny deadpans. He hadn’t been meaning to talk about Steve or rant about him at all, but Kono was right he should complain about Steve McGarrett to these people at least, vent some of his hopeless feelings and in the end and exaggerate how much of a menace he really is. It hurt in some way when he got rejected, or rather, figured out he'd get rejected because Steve's got a girlfriend. It does some good to him since Amy barely knows her and he won't get a snide remark like he would from Rachel or Kono on telling him how much of a doofus he is for being so hurt by a guy he's never met.

He knows they mean the best when they say it. Because he's got into so much pain for being a hopeless romantic, for being to open and not guarded enough. Kono and Rachel have taught him to toughen up a bit, to just throw away the silly feelings of euphoria as just a simple crush. 

Steve is just a crush. There's nothing more Danny could do than face cold hard facts. 

And Amy, is the perfect listener. Well, almost, it's besides the fact that she thinks him and Steve will be a great couple; she’s still nice to talk to and vent about. 

Danny’s beginning to open up to some of the people in the council meetings he goes to for Single Parents and united. Amy was a native from Hawaii, when his husband got transported to the NYPD and they moved. It was only two years on the force that he died in field and Amy was left to deal that her unborn child wasn’t going to meet his father. He told Danny all this quickly, unable to go into details about the memory’s, and Danny accepted. She had found randomly found Kamekona’s support group and she was very lucky that she did. Her soft curly blond hair and warm eyes nod at Danny’s fake agreement.

“No it is,” Amy says diligently. “It so cute how you guys met. I mean it’s a lot like a love story." 

“Your technique is not good enough,” Kamekona says butting in the conversation, and cutting off Danny’s pragmatic response.

Danny gives him a glare. “But I’ve done it 30 damn times." 

“No,” Kamekona says disapprovingly, as he slaps Danny’s hand away from the diapers. “Need to be more gentler, brah."

“If I go any ‘gentler’ I’m not going to secure the tabs properly.”

“It’s like this,” Kamekona takes the diaper and the doll for said diaper, and puts on the diaper in one quick, graceful stride with his hand. 

“How the hell do you do that?” he asks, utterly confused by how he seemed to do it so quickly.

“Aunties always asked me to babysit. I've been practiced well.”

“And how many ‘Aunties are there?’”

“Too many to count, brah” Kamekona says handing the doll back to Danny. “Practice more.”

“I’ve done it over 30 times,” Danny repeat. “I don’t think the baby cares that I am ‘gentler’ while securing its diaper.”

“You practice or no malasadas. And no swearing please. Children don't need to hear that."

Danny sighs in resignation and resumes putting on the diaper on and off. Kamekona walks off to look at the other parents diaper handling skills.

“You shouldn’t worry too much. He treats everyone with the same scrutiny. It may seem silly, but hes got the best intentions.” Amy says.

Danny is too grateful because of Kamekona. He's shown him that he shouldn’t microwave breast milk; makes the milk too hot for the baby, too use cotton items for the babys soft skin, that Danny should always be wary of the slightest temperature change and a hell of a lot more facts that Danny didn’t know about. He’s thankful he has Kamekona’s aid.

Otherwise Danny would be slightly handicapped on the whole parenting thing.          

Danny watches him walk by to other parents doing the same task as them. All of them struggling or showing a smugness at achieving the baby folding diaper challenge.          

“The children should be scared of what he's wearing. That is something they don't need to see." 

Amy gives a small laugh. “But he knows what's good for you. I’d be so lost without him. He’s helped us all out.”

Danny gives a slight nod and resumes again with the strange duty of putting a diaper on a baby doll.

Once the council meetings and the fake-baby caring practice is over, Danny says his goodbyes to everyone and walks out into the streets to hail a cab since he still hasn't had the time to get a new car in the mean time. He's actually been a lot more busy than usual with all the meetings and preparations for this baby that he might have. 

Getting home for him is the repeat of the same thing for Danny. Especially when he doesn’t have Rachel or Kono or some type of social hang out, he’s at his apartment, where he spends most of his times alone. He sombers up from being the happy go lucky guy, drops his façade and just let him settle in his misery. He sits down on his bed after eating a quick meal and just sits around. He doesn't really feel like helping out in the kitchen plus today had been a slow day. His crew can handle a few tables on their own for the night. 

But it's nights like these that get Danny thinking about where he is in life, where exactly he is on the scale of ‘how much his life sucks.’ It’s amazing how much his moods can wax and wane in a day, but they happen, and Danny just can’t break the habit. His mind still trying to come up with an answer for why he'd never been able to settle down. 

He comes to the conclusion that he is in the middle of the ocean, drowning. It's simple. 

He is. There’s no point to try to candy floss it. He’s not being self-depreciating; just telling the basic truth.

He’s is in the middle of the ocean, and is drowning, or sinking, or any other synonym for being encompassed by water.

It's not only the fact that Danny seems to be drowning, it's also that no one seems to reach out for Danny. No magical sailboat is going to pull him out of the water, and save him. He will sink until he gets to the bottom, until he’s forgotten in the vastness of the ocean. 

He may have that many friends, but Danny’s only friend seems to be Rachel, Gadini and Giuseppe and maybe even Kono, but he knows that they can’t save Danny from his misery. They try to do their best to do so, but they have their own life to live, and Danny can’t really ask them to give up their lives to pick of the remains of what’s left for Danny’s. Danny can’t ask that. He won’t ask for that.

Part of him knows that there not always going to be there for Danny, he knows that no matter how much they love Danny, it’s not going to be enough to help him. 

And also what will happen when all of his friends move on? When Danny seems to stay in the same spot he has been for the past 20 years of his life. Who does he have then? What kind of legacy will Danny leave? Danny will never find someone he can call his own, and vice versa. Someone Danny knows he can always rely on to help him. 

Would having a kid really help Danny with all that? He wants to believe it will be that easy, that Danny’s life could be filled with laughter and fun, each and every night. He would be an amazing parent for his kid. He could be the dad, something that Danny never actually had as a kid. He could teach them how to ride a bike, tell them bedtime stories late at night, or even kiss booboo’s better. Danny can imagine having a real Christmas at his house, even a small Thanksgiving dinner, heck a New Year’s eve party that isn’t held at Rachel’s house. Danny wants all that and much more.

Danny no longer wants to be alone. If Danny can’t have his sailboat, then he would at least like a life preserver to hang on to. 

He wants a family to call his own. Wants at least one form of a family.

Danny knows that he accepts his life the way it is, but that doesn’t mean he agrees with it. He hates that no matter how much he might yell or scream for some miraculous cure to his own disposition, that he can't help himself on his own.

It's wrong for him to just go looking for a person to hold on to to help him, but it's damn well what he needs. It's not a solution to his problem, Danny knows, having a kid isn't going to solve anything. But he want's to believe it could be a catalyst for some good to come his way, to help motivate him and really get out of this misery state his been in for a long time. It just feels right knowing he's going to be a dad. 

 

———————————————————-

 

It's on days that Danny really regrets not having the light gleam upon him to wake him up. It's a annoying little shrill that actually wakes him up at 9 in the morning, but it then segues into the Alfred Hitchcock “Psycho” music that really gets Danny confused for a bit. _Rachel_ , Danny thinks. He'd been meaning to change that, but it seems to fit as a ringtone for Rachel. 

“What?” Danny asks when he fumbles for his phone on the nightstand.

“Where the hell are you? You aren’t at the restaurant, and its 9:00 PM.” 

“Shit, why aren’t I there?” Danny says dumbly, his brain still trying to understand how to properly speak out loud. His efforts getting out of bed quickly end up with him getting a face full of carpet flooring.

“My thoughts exactly. Wait? Are you upstairs?" 

Danny rubs his aching nose. "Yeah I've been up here for a while, over sleeping by accident." 

"Oh my god, Kono! Tell Trevor and Angelina to stop looking for him in the park. Yup. He's been upstairs the whole time." 

"You thought I took a daily stroll today?" Danny said while shaking his head as he was pulling up his chef pants on. 

"You've been doing it for a quite a bloody long time. It'd seemed weird that you'd break that habit." 

"Well I'm a changeable guy. I'm up for change. Change is good." 

"Yeah, yeah. Just get down now. Me and Kono pulled up a new catering client for a wedding business. So get your shit together, and get down here so we can sell some food."

Danny heads down stairs to the restaurant at 9:13, he checked on his watch, timing how long it took to get his clothes, teeth brushed, hair toned, and other essentials to keep his professionalism intact. 

He comes in through the stairs and opens the doors that lead to the left interior of the restaurant. Danny doesn't see them at first, only just morning customers that are just in a numbered few. It's after a few more steps that he notices Rachel and Kono sitting on the patio decks outside. He heads out towards them, putting on his flat chef hat subconsciously, that's been safely deposited in his pocket. 

“Why did you oversleep, brah,” Kono asks as Danny sits down with them to look over what they've settled on for the food. “What happened?” 

"Light didn't shine..." Danny immediately stops the words escaping his mouth without his consent. It's times like these when his brain isn't logged in yet to give proper, sane responses. "I just was thinking. That's all. Couldn't sleep well cause of it." 

“He means thinking about Steve,” Rachel says primly, hiding her mouth with her hands.

“The guy at the cheese station?”

“Yah.” Rachel hisses.

“The hot one though, right?” Kono says. "The guy with the beanie just wasn't Danny's type." 

"I don't have a type." 

“The one with the abs, and the brown slightly curly hair,” Rachel says. 

“With the tattooed arms?” Kono laughs.

“Please do talk about Steve in front of me, I don’t care,” Danny says hisses back. “And by the way Rachel putting your hand over your mouth does not make it a secret.”

Rachel puts her out stretched palm in a pantomimed manner to her mouth. "Yes it does,” she says in a stage whisper. "I told you to stop being so emotionally attached to men before. Like seriously you have the heart of a 16 year old." 

“Come on Danny. Lighten up a bit, live in the hang 10, bruddah.” Kono chimed in, mocking his words against him. 

“Well you guys can ‘lighten up.’ I’ll be in my office setting the bills for this month’s charges.” 

“Steve might not even like that Catherine girl,” Kono yells when Danny starts to walk off. “With the way he was looking at you, you were more his choice.”

“Yeah I totally did see some eye-fucking.” Rachel added unhelpfully. "I mean you don't have to love the guy, but you sure can bang him for bragging rights." 

“I don’t give a shit,” Danny declared, and even to his own ears it sounded weak. “I don’t need a relationship, or a damn fuck buddy,” Danny said in a stage whisper. “You've told me to not give myself  false hope and I get it, I do. I  accepted that. But I'll handle whatever I'm feeling with this guy on my own, okay?” With that said Danny stormed off to his office.

————————— —————————

Danny grumbled in silence most of the day. He mind was only focused on cooking and not talking, which is very bad, because Danny is a chatter box at nature. You only know if he’s in a good mood is if he’s yelling and whirling his hand like helicopter. If he’s quiet then you know for sure shit is going to hit the fan with him.

“Hey boss, a customer has a complaint, and wants to see you.” Angie whispered quietly next to Danny on the stove.

"What?" Danny asks, straining to hear her tiny voice in the cacophony of the kitchen.  “I’m sorry, Angie. Would you please repeat that again?”

She nodded. “A customer. He had a complaint about the baked salmon.”

"What were his exact words?" 

"Ummm the man called it... shit on a plate."

Danny stopped chopping altogether, his eyes wide opened and his posture suddenly going defensive. "That's some criticism from a what? What is he? A critic?"

"He never really said who he was. Just called it crap." 

Danny handed the cutting board to Trevor, one of his other prep cooks Danny already had thousands of points to accuse this person of their idiocy. Not a freaking critic, no credentials to actually critic the food but their own bland tasting tongue. The smoked salmon drizzled with special sweet sauce was something Danny and Kono had created themselves. Now some nobody comes to his restaurant and judges his salmon like they're a freaking renowned critic of all that is food. 

"Kono!" Danny yelled out loud, getting the attention the Hawaiian sous chef.

"What, chef?" she said coming next to Danny's side as quickly as possible. Her hands were wet from deveining the shrimp for this weeks shrimp pasta course. 

"Go make the risotto dish, with the special goat cheese added too." Its the nicest dish they've got and with the the best reviews on it. It's also damn tasty that you'd give up a left arm for it.

"Alright." Kono nodded off and went to collect the cheese and rice for the meal. "Complainer?" 

"You know it." 

"We'll show that idiot real food," she said barking her laughter in a condescending way as she went to make the risotto.  

"Show me the table, Angie." Danny followed her out through the main door and was led by his waitress to the complaining customers table.

"Hey there, Danno." 

His face as he saw who it was nearly made him want to crawl back into his skin and just never come out, and some other part of him wanted to lunge at McGarrett for having the gall to make jokes about his food, and some other deep part of him was actually excited to see him again. "Hi" is all that Danny can really say in this situation, his mind still figuring out what reaction he'd make. 

“This is weird, we seem to be bumping into each other a lot. What is this, like the third time?”

“Yeah, weird, definitely," he deadpanned. "

"You think it means something?" 

"Cut the crap, Steve, okay. Look who’s the one that’s stalking now?” Danny said putting his hands on his hips nonchalantly. He's chosen the forth option of just acting cool and collective. He's not gonna go on a diatribe. 

“I assure you that I go to Desdemona every Fridays,” Steve says primly.

“And ask for a specific chef to the dining area? I dunno Steven that seems pretty farfetched to me,” Danny said, using the same exact words as Steve had thrown at him a few days ago. I

A playful smile spreads on Steve’s face, and if Danny isn’t happy that he’s the one who put it there, then he’s totally lying. “Chin told me I should go here,” Steve admits. "Said that you worked here. I dunno I guess I wanted something good to eat." 

 Its not that hard to figure out Steve's intention but Danny doesn't like to be one to jump to conclusions so quickly. He just waits for Steve to play out his cards first, that is, if he's willing to play. 

"You called my food shit. That means you're not enjoying my food or you're lying to just generally annoy me."

A sheepish blush crosses Steve's face. 

"I may have fibbed a bit. But I do think that you need to work on the consistency of the sauce, its kind of pastey." 

"I can kick you out of my restaurant you know? I own it. I can just ban you from ever entering it." 

"I'm a paying customer. You can't kick me out for nothing."

"Steven. I. Own. This. Place." Danny felt like he needed to reiterate that point. 

Steve had the gall to rolls his eyes at Danny, and then stealthily replaced it with soft puppy dog eyes and pouty lips. "Please. I like the food."

"Why are you here again? You didn't really answer it." 

"I came here with Cath... she's the one who picked it out," Steve said, his face kind of contorting in that way a teenagers would when they were caught in the act of stealing the car from their parents garage. 

"Oh. That's great. Where is the lovely lady?" Danny didn't know if he'd put as much acid into the word 'lady' than deemed necessary. It's nothing personal that Danny should feel. He's just jealous and he's gonna act a bit petty.

Steve gave a quick cough. “Um. She she left."

Danny’s eyebrows raised in response. “Excuse me?” He said, voice sound every bit trying to be flat.  

"Look she left because she wasn't interested anymore. End of the story really."

"I'm betting she got a stellar look at your personality for that to happen in the middle of the date."

"You said so yourself, Danno, that you didn't know me. I'm a _stranger_ to you. She could have left for other reasons."

"I can take a good guess, McGarrett. One cursory glance can give me a lot to work with." 

"Well take a cursory glance at this salmon. It needs a rework."

Danny wanted to throttle McGarrett for being so insufferable. How can Danny suddenly go to being in the position of power to being under the scrutiny of Steve so easily. A minute ago Danny was making fun of Steve's dine and dash pal and now he's complaining about his food in the most pointless way. 

Danny sighed as he rubbed at his face some more. "That salmon might just be bad," Danny said through his hands. "It's not a terrible recipe, Steve." 

"Shitty quality food then. I can complain about that."

Flabbergasted was what Danny felt, as his eyes opened, teeth clenched, and hands gesticulated in a 'what the hell' fashion. “Who are you Chef Ramsay? I don’t think you have the right to accuse me of my culinary and quality service. 

“No, I don’t think I am. I'm just saying its not what I expected from the reviews I looked up on." 

"Steve I swear to god I will throw you out the door right now if you do not shut up with your criticism."

Steve leaned back in his chair, head nodded to the back, almost in a defiant act. "Like you could lif-"

It's all Steve can get out before he's being grabbed by the hand and hauled out the restaurant like he's a petulant child being scolded by a parent, which, in a not funny way, actually is happening.

Steve gave him an incredulous look as his but lands on the floor outside of Danny's restaurant. He did not seem to think that would happen. 

"Bye, Steven," Danny said with a triumphant smile. His body may be small, but it's compact with rigid muscles, so that he can carry more than what's expected of him. 

"Danny, really? You just threw me out from my paid meal." 

"Your service was greatful, Mr. McGarrett, enjoy the rest of the day." And with that, Danny closes the door of Desdemona with a loud clack. And he doesn't even give two shits for the murmurs and whispers his guests are babbling about him, all probably talking about the scene that just played out before them.

He doesn't care.

All that really matters is that he fucking won this time.

It felt nice to achieve the task of actually beating Steve at his stupid back and forth game. He'd relish the look of surprise Steve got when he hefted him with his two arms, cradling Steve as he led him out the door to be left hungry and unsated. 

It also only lasts for approximately 4 seconds before he rushes inside his apartment to grab his coat and run out the door without any other word. 

 _What the fuck am I doing? I just told the asshat to get out and now - what? I'm going back to him?_ Danny's thoughts were jumbled up, his main thoughts were just on finding where Steve had gone. Danny thought he would not be able to go that far, it hadn't been that long since the exchange.

When his eyes focus on a route to a bus entrance that he see's him, Steve. 

“Come on, goof. I’ll show you to place where we can eat. Somewhere you won't disturb my customers." 

Steve's face is one of stupefaction, obviously not expecting this to happen at all. It's a nice consolation prize that Danny will take.

Steve perked at the comment. “Where?” is all Steve asks of him as Danny leads him. 

It goes smoothly as they walk by each others side. It doesn't feel awkward or strange with how things worked out this way, how he ended up going for the guy he'd told himself wouldn't be worth it. He doesn't really care for such details. It's not like him and Steve ever met on a conventional level from the start. 

"We can turn here. We're not far from our destination." 

“We are not eating here,” Steve says as him and Danny end up in front of a Greasy Dog vendor. 

“Why not?” Danny asks curiously as they look at the orange neon sign above them. “Greasy Dogs are good.”

“You took me from shitty quality food, to shitty quality, unhealthy food." 

“Grow up Steven, and stop being such a health-freak. A little fat won’t do you that much harm.”

“You know it’s that kind of motto that makes this,” Steve says as he palms Danny’s stomach without as much care for personal space as a limpet to a rock would, “the reason you don’t have much muscle built up.”

Danny would blush at Steve’s touch, if he didn't just call him fat. "I carried your fatass out, I can do it again, Steve."He gives him a death glare as he speaks out again “I’ll have you know that I do have abs, okay, they just might not be washboard abs like yours.”

“You can tell I have washboard abs?” Steve said innocently.

“Anyone with eyes could see you have abs.”

They quickly get their orders, without Steve’s vehement protest on the subject. They settle down on a table and it only takes a minute before Steve starts to complain, again.

“Look its seeping through the paper, that’s disgusting,” Steve says with an honest to god look of pure repulsiveness.

Danny notes this and makes a big deal of taking a bite out of his chili, greased hot-dog.

Steve grimaces at Danny’s mouth. ”Do you not know how much grease and carbohydrates are put into those things?”

After swallowing his hot-dog down. “Yes, and I don’t care. Now let me eat my chili dog in peace.” Danny takes another bite of his hot-dog with as much gusto as the last one. 

Steve just cringes even more in disgust. Danny loves it. 

“So you’re from Jersey, right?” Steve says once Danny finishes his hot-dog and can actually seem to stomach a conversation with Danny. 

“Yeah, how’d you know?” Danny quirked his brow, wiping his mouth with a napkin. 

“Your accents not from here.” _  
_

Danny had hoped he'd gotten the accent to die out a little bit, but he nods at Steve's observational skills. “Nice one there, Detective.”

“Why’d you move here to New York? I mean isn’t New Jersey the same here?”

“Nope. They’re less accepting of queers down there. Well that’s more of my opinion I guess, but it's how I felt when I used to live there.”

“Oh,” Steve says understanding. “But you still speak with your parents, right?”

“No, my dad kicked me out when I came out at 16, and mom died from cancer when I was 18.”

“Sorry," Steve said shaking his head. "That was a stupid question to ask. I’m sorry, Danny. Didn't mean to bring bad memories.”

“Forget it.” Danny says it  to deflect. “Now it’s only fair for me to say this," he says while opening his second hot-dog wrappings, and chewing on it for a good amount before speaking again. “Where are you from?” he asks once he gulps it down. 

“I’m originally from Hawaii. Oahu to be exact.”

“That explains your tan and affinity for pineapples. I just thought you were whacked by pineapples as a kid. Turns out you were raised in that pineapple-infested hellhole. And now you've made me say pineapple so many times, gross.”

“Hawaii isn’t that bad.” His brows forming into a crease at Danny's response.

“No, Hawaii isn’t bad, it’s just not for me,” Danny admits. “They just make an abomination out of food by putting pineapples on everything like it’s their business to drown the world in damned fruit, and don’t get me started on the beach-“

“What kind of person doesn’t like the beach?" Steve interrupts. 

“Me,” states Danny simply. 

Steve just blinks at him owlishly, like someone not expecting to like beaches to be an unnatural thing.

“Oh, you can’t swim. That's why,” Steve says with a rueful smile. 

Danny rolls his eyes at Steve's inability to grasp the concept that different people are capable of not liking the same things he likes. “I swim, Steven, just for survival, not for fun. I also don’t like the sand on the beach, gets everywhere. And that dead sea smell, just nasty.”

“The beach is fun, Danno. Remind me one day to bring you to a beach sometime.”

“Remind me to stop you. Preferably with pepper spray.” Danny secretly smiles at the fact at the promise of a next time, though he makes quick to forget that as he realizes something strange, something that's been niggling his head for a while since the whole confrontation with Steve happened.

"Why'd Catherine leave you? I wanna know the real reason, Steve." 

Steve gives out a put upon sigh, not liking that the topic of conversation has gone back to his date. "Look she kind of realized I wasn't really interested in getting back together. I mean we've always just been friends with benefits, that use to date, just for the sake of trying out. It didn't really work out. I mean today I thought we'd just be having a nice dinner together, as friends." 

"So that's why she left. What's worrying me is that you called me out after that. Am I your second choice, Steve?" Danny had said it in a manner that didn't seem to accusing, or he hoped it didn't. He just really wanted it to be a loaded question that Steve would answer honestly. 

"Yeah, I guess you could say that," Steve nods to Danny, making him feel shunned at the curt response. "But not in the way you're thinking," Steve said, the hands in his pockets poking out in a consoling manner, like that's going to  somehow absolve Danny's hurt feelings. "It's complicated what I had with you. I mean we met and I felt sparks fly and - shit I shouldn't act all this flustered but I am. It was just nice being with you, and Catherine just asked me for dinner before I'd met you, and I didn't think of it as a date as much until now, and realized what that might've meant to you."

"Still sounds like I'm the second best, Steve." 

"Okay, I get that I'm not getting my point across as nicely as I would like. It's just I'd really like- no- just. What I'm really just saying is that I like you. I chose you over Catherine because even when I was on dinner with her, all I was thinking about was the next time I could meet you, just figuring out the next time I could talk and maybe just explain the whole situation that I wasn't really dating Catherine. It wasn't a date, not for me, and Catherine saw it that way too, and just decided to leave altogether."

Danny's ears begin to pink a bit, his eyes staying focused on to Steve's being, who's also now brought his head down in embarrassment. "Doesn't explain much about why you went to my place for a date. There are countless of them. I'm not accepting serendipity again, for the reason you came to mine."

Steve slowly thumbs his fingers over each other, his shoulders slightly taut. "You know I figured out later that she'd brought me to your restaurant to spite you. She was asking for the chef's personal recommendation for a decent wine to pick out. I understood now when she told me you owned it." 

"Oh."

"Yeah, oh. Danny it just didn't settle with me after that. We got in an argument when I accused her of that fact and she retorted back that I may have had something going on with you. She was just trying to make things clear that I was her boyfriend." 

"I'm sorry. For you arguing about me."

"Don't be. It's what made her really understand that I just wasn't interested in being with her anymore, I guess I can thank you for that, respectfully of course." 

Danny gulped. All the information just adding to what was already a popped question to an answer. "Because you wanted to be with me. Right? She stopped because of me." 

Steve gives a soft chuckle. "Yes, Danny. I did. So lets start over, this was all strange to deal with and I'm sorry for that." 

"Okay," Danny nods, holding his hands out for Steve to shake, "I'm Danny and I like you too."

"Hi, Danno. I'm Steve, and it's nice to know that, too." 

Steve's given a deserved playful smack to the chest. "It's still Danny, you goof." 

"And I'll still call you Danno no matter what." 

It's nice, starting over. It's simple to begin with. 

Once Danny finished his second hot-dog, Steve had dragged him into a salad bar a few streets over, saying that he couldn’t sleep without eating a proper meal first.

“A hot-dog is a proper meal.”

“No its not,” Steve retorts.

Danny had to cover his ears the whole way when Steve kept telling him platitudes about the benefits of broccoli, spinach and other types of green food. He heard enough of that stuff from Rachel's baby food talk.

After Steve ate his ‘health food,’ they walked back to Danny’s place. It's a slow pace this time, something that happens when you talk with someone, and really talk with someone. Danny realizes its one of those talks that just really gets you motivated to speak more, to listen more, and sometimes to really just enjoy the silent company of another. 

The certain things they talk about very in a spectrum of topics, and Danny isn’t sure if he’s ever talked to someone, and still have the person interested, since his life is an absolute bore. It’s like Steve enjoys each syllable the comes out of Danny’s mouth. And Danny seems to be the same with Steve too.

When they’re almost there to Danny’s place, Danny has some extensive knowledge about Steve's life at Kuikui highschool. They talk about his football records, the records that had beaten all of Chin’s, and also a funny story about how he fell off the pipe when he was 13.

And Danny seems to share similar stories too, some even about his family, about times he actually had fun, but to be honest with Danny, they almost always have Rachel as the source of entertainment. His family isn't one that takes jokes or comedy as something that's essential. 

It takes Danny by surprise when Steve stops them suddenly, when they're only a few blocks away from the Desdemona, a hand placed over his chest to stop him, and he's suddenly leaning in close, hovering over Danny's lips. "I'm sorry if this is too quick, but I just want t,  before you leave, we've gone way too long without doing this, don't you think."

Danny knows what’s going to happen next, and his body doesn’t know if it wants to stop it or to go along with it. It seems like he's choosing the latter as he leans in, brushing foreheads with Steve's. 

But his brain is clearly screaming ‘ _Don’t let it happen’ ‘don’t do this, end this quickly and forget about it!"_

Danny can almost feel Steve’s breath on his lips, feel the hitch in his breath as Danny holds on to Steve's hands, holding them close to each other, in the center of their chests.

It's exactly at the time when Steve begins to lean in closer, that his phone rings.

" _Shit._ You gotta be kidding me."

Danny mentally sighs in relief, removing his hands clasped with Steve's slowly. “What can I say; I’m no not an easy date, Steve. I bet you it's fate trying to tell you that with that inopportune phone call. You gotta try again tomorrow,” Danny says as he pats Steve awkwardly on the shoulder and heads to his apartment door.

“So there will be a tomorrow?” Steve says through the drone of his phone ringing, looking relieved. “How about 7?”

Hopelessly romantic outvotes Danny’s common sense, which is why he looks directly at Steve and says, “that works for me.” Bringing out his pointer finger and aiming it at Steve he quickly adds, “I better see more originality McGarrett. I’ll be keeping a checklist.”

“I will. Don’t worry, Danny. Fate's gonna take a lot harder to inconvenience me next time, I promise.”

"You can leave now, Steve. You don't have to take me to my backdoor entrance. I can head there by myself."

"Afraid I might try to kiss you again?"

_No. I'm very afraid I might kiss you instead._

"Steve go home, this is already too much of a rom-com movie trope for me to handle. Save it for tomorrow, where I can really make it up for you," Danny makes it as suggestive as possible, hoping that'll make Steve feel better.  

He holds Danny’s stare far longer than necessary, until he turns around, where the faintest start of a smile forms on his face. Steve walks away then, in the opposite direction, pulling out his phone that’s started ringing for the second time. He can hear his faint voice talking to some guy in a whole different language, it's something that Danny isn't ever going to understand. 

Danny stay's outside, stuck left in the same position, a few blocks from his restaurant. It gives him time left to ponder his thoughts on Steve.  Like why he forgets his resolve when he’s around Steve, doesn’t know why he chucks it out the window for a little playful flirting and banter in return. Danny knows how this will end, he’s played this game 14 times. The outcome isn’t going to be any different, and made even worse with the addition that he might be a father to a child carried to term by his best friend. It's not worth hurting himself over to feel a little happy in the few months they date.

He gives a big sigh as he goes through the back alley, towards the staircase heading to his apartment door.

 _Fourteens too close to an unlucky number anyways_ , Danny thinks to himself in a bitter, self-deprecating tone. 

_Fifteen is a nice number to stick with._


	6. Ties Are Meant For Burning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alright so all mistakes are of my own and I am still revising the other works. it's taking a lot more time as I seem to be adding way more to the story than necessary, but I am a massive air bag when it comes to writing as of now. So it may take some time to finish the other four chapters to go and then there's the whole process of finishing off the five other chapters I need to make....
> 
> crap. 
> 
> I guess the estimating due date for this fic could be December or early Jan, but who knows for sure. 
> 
> So here it goes the 'date night' chapter.
> 
> PS. 
> 
> Happy thanksgivings everyone!!!! (Canadians celebrates thanksgivings in october)

Walking with Gadini in the park, Danny chewed on his lips, while his brain had been racking with the idea that he had a date with Steve tomorrow. Danny knew that he didn’t do well in concealing his pensive thoughts because after a few strides on the pathway Gad asked what was wrong. 

“Nothing,” Danny said absently as he continued to walk.

“I really hate it when you do that,” grumbled Gadini. He grabbed Danny by the elbow, forcing him to stop his walk. 

“Okay, well it’s not important. Its just… I have a  _date_. And it's kind of freaking me out.”

“A  _date_? That seems important, Danny," Gadini scolded faintly. "So who is he?”

" It's Steve. He works near you guys, I think, in the market.”

“Hmmm... _Oh_ , that Steve," Gadini said nodding. "Well good choice. He's a nice guy. Nicer ass, too.”

“Gadini Vecelli,” Danny said reprovingly. “What would Giuseppe say to you?”

“Relax, he’s the one who said it.”

“You two are so gross. You’re both like what, in your late 40’s? I thought men like you would reach the precipice of your sex drive now.”

“I’m an Italian. I cannot lose my sex drive.” Gadini said seriously. “And just because I’m 47 doesn’t mean I’m old. Me and Gus like to think of ourselves as still virile. And I like to think of myself as a young Robert Downy Jr.”

“Yeah, you really bring out that stereotype.” Danny shivered at the many times he had walked in on them shagging each other brains out, as it was the equivalent to Danny seeing his parents shagging, that is if he had normal parents, but overall, it was a very traumatic moment for him. “You looking like RDJ, yeah, I totally see that.”

Gadini smacked him in the back of the head. “Okay, so, you and Steve. When’s the date?”

“Ow.” Danny rubbed the back of his head. “This thursday." 

“Where’s he taking you?”

“I don’t really know. He said it was a secret, don’t really know why it’s a secret.”

“So why aren’t you excited?”

Danny stopped walking and looked at Gadini’s critical face. “I am excited.”

“So what’s with your face all sad.”

“It’s just…”

“You think he’s going to end up like your other relationships?” Gadini summarized the rest of Danny’s emotions and what, deep down, he'd always been contemplating from the start, since he'd accepted Steve's offer for a date. 

Danny silently nodded, but there was more to that, about why he was nervous that is. “It’s just that I really like him. I don’t really want him to end up like all the others. I’m just scared that if it ends, I’m going to get hurt.”

“Well then get to know the guy first. Steve could end up being a douche, and the whole thing will seem moot.”

Danny hadn’t really thought it that way, but it hurt to think that he and Steve wouldn’t be compatible. It was a feeling that hurt worst then Steve breaking up with him. At least then Danny could say that he had a chance, and the baby thing just messed it up, and it not actually being Danny's fault this time. 

The walk hadn’t really helped Danny out in anyway, but it did bring out more troubles then it warranted. It did tire him a bit, making the idea of comfort in his bed much more appealing. 

It was a ritual that had started randomly when Danny needed to exercise his knee a bit, and Gadini was willing to walk by his side so he wouldn’t get bored. After that it became a thing of theirs to walk and talk about the things that were happening in their lives, it helped Danny a lot. He could always find bona fide advice from him on their walks.

It was also killing Danny that he didn’t tell them that he was having a kid, just yet. Part of the reason was that he was scared to talk about it, and the other was that Giuseppe was on a business trip, and he wouldn’t be back until a week later. So Danny chose to stay quiet and wait for a little while.

But in lieu of actually going to his place, he opted to head off to the subway station to get to the market since he still didn't own a car. He needed to talk to Steve, badly. Danny saw the happy face Steve made when he saw Danny come over to his stall. Danny hated what he was going to do. 

"I just can't do tonight, Steve. I have to work both the evening and night shift since a few of my staff had to leave for a friends funeral." It wasn't technically a lie, they actually were going to a funeral. It's just that Danny omitted that he had replacements in advance for them, and told them to take an easy day to mourn their lost friend. 

"Alright. So how about Saturday night?" 

"Hmmm..." said Danny jokingly. 

"Danno, you can't expect me to wait out this long for a date. I'll try, Danny, but I'll fail," Steve says with a curve of his lips, trying not to look to peeved.

"It might work," Danny pondered at the thought. 

"You can say  _no_  if you want to, Danny. I'm not trying to force myself on you, too much. I just want to go on a nice date, with you, that's all." 

Danny bit his lips. Hearing Steve being so damn nice to him isn't helping him make his choice any better. It would have been better if he just pestered him some more about the date. Now though, it seemed like Steve had a limit on how much he could do that. And Danny did see that Steve was being genuine and honest about his feelings, so it only should be fair that Danny should too. 

"It's not that, I'm not saying no, I just want some time, and to prove it," Danny said, hands on the stall table to lift himself up to level with Steve's face. 

It's right then in that moment that Danny grabs him by the chin and gives him a prim kiss on his lips, no tongue, just a simple kiss on the mouth that left a tingle on Danny's lips. "I'll see you soon, babe," Danny says as he backs off, a smile on his face. "I'll give you my number so you can contact me about the time and any other details like that." He'd written it beforehand, meaning to give it to Steve since both of them really didn't have any form of contact other than serendipitous moments. 

Steve shakes his head imperceptibly, still possibly dumbfounded by the kiss as he accepts Danny's number. "Yeah, that's good, I'll see you on the weekend then." 

Danny nods to his answer, grinning, and feeling all the sorts of euphoria with the contact, making him radiate with a giddiness that he was slightly ashamed for. It made Danny feel very excited to know what he'd feel if he really kissed Steve. 

As Danny walked out of the market and back to the train station, his happy feelings faded, numbed out with an abrupt, but not unexpected, fear for his relationship with Steve.

Danny knew he felt too much with Steve, felt so happy, felt so comfortable, that it'd tear him down to know how vulnerable and pathetic he actually was. He couldn't handle another rejection, handle another failed attempt again. To have Steve take happiness for him, away from him, to make him feel so lonely again.

But the most terrible thing that Danny was afraid of was that he'd go through with it. Go with the pain like any martyr would. Go through it with a pitiable, proficient routine of dating and slowly feeling a person lose interest in you or you in them. He'd do it because Danny fears never knowing. Never doing all that he could, all that he can, to have relief from knowing that you did everything possible and it still ended up that way. 

It's hard to deal with that, but it's what he needs to do to get his feelings straightened out. 

And Danny needs more time to recuperate, to brace himself for this relationship. It's horrible how he acts this way, feeling so cynical that he believe that they're heading to quickly towards failure. It's too soon to have another date with Steve so that's why he'll wait for him.

And the worst part of it all is that maybe in a twisted sense, he's trying to prolong his feelings, or trying to prolong Steve's feelings. Maybe Danny just wants to know the affection and care for each other is still humble and true.

Before he messes it up. 

 

\----------------------------------------------A Week-------------------------------------------------------------------

 

The knock on the door did not make Danny race for it, but he was grinning like an idiot when he ambled towards it, a pleasing feeling in his chest at the thought of seeing Steve after a week of no contact.

Only the use of cellphones or texting was used to really communicate, although it never really got on the topic of their date, since that was the main reason Danny gave him his number. It didn't bother Danny that much though since it gave him a tame way to talk with Steve and get to know him better.

I guess in a sense it might have been preemptive attempt at figuring if they were compatible or not. 

But Danny dropped his thoughts and grin almost immediately when he saw it was just Rachel, giving her a thin smile instead. “Oh, it you.” 

“Hello to you, too.”

“Please come in, Rachel.” Danny grumbles as he walks away from the door, hearing Rachel close it. 

He doesn’t know why Rachel visits his place when she has her own place to be with her own kids, but he realizes that there in school hours, and Rachels probably bored out of her mind. 

Going to the bathroom, getting himself even more ready, checking his hair and smell, too. He even bought a new tie, but he really isn’t going to tell anyone about that fact. 

The whole time since he woke up, he’d been contemplating the situation he’s just gotten himself into and the many more thoughts and doubts that come along with it. 

“So how are you doing Rachel?” Danny says flopping on the couch when he’s done and all he has to do is wait. I guess Danny shouldn’t have decided to be an hour early preparing himself.

“If you’re only asking about my health, I’m doing fine. If you’re asking about my uterus again, fuck you. And you smell like shit.” 

“That wasn’t what I was asking for, but okay. And its Selva cologne.”

“Sorry I’ve haven’t been getting sleep lately.” Rachel mumbles out the apology. “I haven’t been this edgy since I was last pregnant with Benny.”

“Are you going to go get an ultrasound?”

“Yep, after a few weeks though. So we should make an appointment soon enough.”

Danny nodded. And wow. The sudden realization hits Danny like a freight train, he doesn’t know why this didn’t happen sooner. Danny’s whole life will be changing because of this. He’s going to have a kid and it’s all seems so quick. He feels like theirs no firm soil to place his feet on in this situation that he’s put himself onto. It’s a lot to take in for him. “This is actually happening.” He breaths out.

“First time jitters, every parent gets them.  I got a bunch of those when I was pregnant with both my kids.”

“ I just can’t believe this. A few weeks ago I just made a decision to have a baby with you, and now you are legitimately pregnant. And I really am going to be a father.” Danny gulps. He’s feeling slightly hysterical. “What am I going to do with a baby? What if I fail? I’m going to be an actual father, and I have nothing planned for this kid. I’ll end up failing and-” 

“And you’ll do great. You’ve even got me, Kono, and that weird support group you hang out with. A lot of kids grow up in worse circumstances, you know.” Rachel says putting her hand on Danny’s knee. “For the planning part, you have money saved up. You can spoil the kid rotten, and still have enough for college or university. Also it’s your restaurant, you can shift your own schedules for your kid, you can be their anytime your kid needs you.” 

“I don’t usually trust your instincts, Rachel. But for once you actually are an expert at something.”

Danny knew he'd get a smack for that. “I hate you sometimes. I’m good at a lot of things, Danny, like acting, cooking, oh, and I really am doing well with knitting! I’m going be knitting this kid a scarf or hat real soon.”

Danny just laughs. He really did need that, a way for Danny to get rid of the tension. Danny also sees the way Rachels shoulders are slumped more than usual and sees that her eyes are less sharp. The pregnancy is also stressing Rachel out just as much is it is Danny. It’s only fair that he should do the same for Rachel, help here ease out her own tension. 

“I’m seeing Steve," Danny admits. "Well, we have a date planned up today, this saturday night.” 

She just nods her head off to him, all shrewd like, seeming as though she knew this was going to happen. "It was clear that Steve was bisexual and that he was attracted to you. See, you didn’t need to have that conniption fit at the restaurant.” The air suddenly clearing between the two of them. 

“Okay, so I might have overreacted." 

"Understatement."

"I may have a flare for dramatics."

"You hate acting." 

"Doesn't mean I can't be dramatic." 

Rachel rolls her eyes at Danny. "Where are you meeting Steve?” she asks, instead of giving another remark. 

“I'm - hey you’re not going to spy on my date?” Danny gives her a skeptical glare. It's been a precaution he's taken since Danny's 6th boyfriend. 

“Me? I’m hurt Daniel. I would never do such a thing.”  She feigns for ignorance, but Danny knows it's total bull crap.

“That’s not what I happened last time. Sean filed a restraining order on you, and you had to get miranda'd by him.”

“So what if I broke a few laws while I followed you guys. It's not like I harmed anyone.”

“Rachel that’s not only called stalking, but it’s called an invasion of privacy.”

“It was out of the goodness of my heart that I had to follow you and him, to a shady part of town, in a gay club, where I may or may not have have made a few tequila buddies over there.”

“Yeah, Rach. Your buddies gave you enough tequila to lose common sense and tackle the poor guy."

“I thought he was trying to get in without the access code,” Rachel protests. "You were protesting a lot."

“It was fucking foreplay. And it was a kiss on the cheek!”

“Cheek, schmeek. You say tomato, I say tomahta,” she beckons nonchalantly. “You can't deny I was being a good friend." 

Danny just shakes his head, realizing again that arguing with her is such a tedious chore. "Why am I your friend?”

“That’s enough talk about boyfriends of the past, they’re boring. Let’s talk about Steve, who’s in the present. So, where are you two schmucks going??”

“No.” Danny said obstinately.

“Tell me, Daniel.” 

“Even if I wanted to, I can’t, he never told me.”

Rachel grimaced. “So it’s a secret date?” 

“Yes.”

Making fake gagging noises, Rachel looks at Danny with dramatic terror. “So he's one of  _those guys._  I bet he’d also bring flowers and chocolate, the damn romantic sap _._ ”

Danny was ready to fire another comeback, when he heard a knock on the door. Huh, Steve must have also decided to come by early.

“That’s probably him.” Danny got up walking across his living room to the door. 

“McGarrett,” Danny says bemused, pleased that it actually is Steve this time. He does a once over of Steve at the door, looking all the sorts of extreme casual dressing because he's taken to the occasion of just wearing a lei flower t-shirt with a clear grey button up to match and faded green cargo pants. It's a nice over all look, but it worries Danny because they're in freaking November. It's too damn cold to not be wearing more layers or a jacket. 

“Hi-Hey-So…ugh- We have a date?” Steve all but jumbles the words.

"What the hell are you wearing?" Danny says instead of a proper response to Steve. 

"Clothes, Danny. You know, the stuff that you wear so that you don't flash people in public."

"Steve it's chilly outside for mid November. You're going to shiver in this weather." 

“What are you his dad?” Rachel joked snidely, coming besides Danny at the doorway.

“Hi, ugh, Rachel, right?”

“Good you remember me. Now Steven, please take care of Daniel on your date, he’s a very sensitive one.” Rachel chimed playfully. 

Steve gives a quick laugh. “I can already tell.”

"I'm getting you a damn sweater at least. I think I've got one of those big, ugly sweaters Rachel got me for christmas." 

" _Hey_. They are not  _ugly_. You have no taste," Rachel sates, offended.  

It's a few minutes later that Danny actually finds one of them and he's surprised to see Steve and Rachel casually talking to each other on his couch. 

"Put this on you damn idiot, and I don't want to hear you complain," Danny says, barging into their conversation. 

Steve looks absolutely appalled at Danny's sweater. It's a terrible green shade that has horizontal lines of red lines and placed at the center is a huge Christmas tree that has a smile that conveys the message, 'love Christmas, or I'll kill you.'

"And you said what I was wearing was bad." 

"Hmmm, yeah okay, I might've bought that one to spite you. That's an awful shade of green," Rachel admitted. 

"Just put it on, Steve. Lets go."

Steve reluctantly puts on the sweater. "You're seriously going to make me wear this?" 

"Yes. It'll keep you warm, babe." 

Steve just grumbles some more to Danny, complaining about how it's itchy.

"Your fault. You didn't bring a damn sweater for yourself." Danny places his own leather jacket on, and wraps a scarf around his neck. 

"Yeah. Because anything you own, that's sensible, is too small for me." 

"Out the door, Steve, or else I'm never getting on this date with you." 

"Okay fine." Steve acquiesces about the ugly sweater and heads to the doorway with Danny . "Bye, Rachel. It was great talking with you." 

"Same to you, Steve." 

Danny places his hand on Steve’s back, pushing him out the door before Rachel and him can get to know each other even more. “Come on, Steven, let’s leave her be.”

And they do. They finally get out of his damn apartment and walk down the stairs and into the pavement. Danny was surprised that they weren't taking a cab or driving their, which made Danny suspect that where Steve was taking him wasn't that far. 

“You’ve always been close with her?” Steve questioned. 

“Well if you're talking about Rachel. Yes. I’ve known her since I was 6.”

“She’s a lifelong friend,” Steve uttered stoically. 

“Relax, she’s married and has kids, no need to get jealous.”

“I wasn’t,” Steve says briskly.

A smile plays on Danny’s face. The lie is obvious to Danny as it was to Steve. “You go believe that, babe. So where are we going?” Danny asks when they’ve walked down a few blocks.

“I told you it’s a classified.”

“I’m not 12, Steven, and we’re outside now, so just tell me.”

“No. You get to put me in a stupid sweater, then I get to have some control, too,” Steve says stubbornly. “Now stop talking,” Steve gave him a small smile that meant it supposed to be taken as too rude.

Danny sighs, and moves his hands in a ‘lead the way’ gesture.

They walk down the street in what felt like forever.  _Where exactly did McGarrett take his dates too_? Danny quietly thought. It better be worth it if Danny has to walk this far.

Danny started to fumble with his new tie. It was the only thing he could do other than talk to Steve, or not look at his ugly sweater. 

“Did you buy that tie for our date?” 

“Oh, were talking now?” Danny quipped. 

“Danny.” Steve said in reply. 

 “Steven it is new, but it wasn’t because of you.”

“Hey that rhymed.” 

Danny raises an eyebrow at him. “Did you just say that?” he asked, very much confused. 

Steve turns away from Danny’s stare, looking sheepish. 

“Do you always say stupid things on dates?” 

“No. Maybe. What?” Steve says quickly. “I’m just having idle conversation here, Danny.” 

“Oh really.” Danny says stopping Steve with a hand on his chest. “Because saying ‘hey that rhymes’ is totally an appropriate way to instigate idle chit chat.” Danny said as he brought both hands up making a ‘what the hell is wrong with you’ signal. “Jesus McGarrett, you need to work on the concept of mammal-to-mammal  interaction.”  Danny advocated. “Idle conversation is not that, Okay.” Danny says snapping his fingers in front of Steve’s face to get his attention, “it’s ‘how’s the weather,’ what do you do for a living’ or the common ‘whoa, you look great.’

“It made you talk didn’t it.” Steve mumbles.

“Number one rule on a date is to be coherent Steven. Because I for one am not instilled with the talent of telepathy.”

“I said,” Steve pauses slightly, tone rising a bit, “it made you talk, didn’t it?”

"Okay, touché.” 

“Hey, you did it again.” Steve repeated in a mocking tone. 

Danny sighed. “Come on McGarrett you’re taking me to this date spot to eat, so I can eat food instead of listening to you.”

"You love conversing with me. Let me rephrase that, you love ranting at me." 

"You don't know that for sure. You could just be a really irritating person, specifically to me." 

"You're a natural fighter. You like this back and forth with me, it's like a foreplay to you, is it not?" 

Danny commends to that comment. "Okay Mr. Astute, can you please stop being an idiot and just take me to my dinner already." 

“Trust me. It’ll be worth working a few pounds off of your waist, with the food I've prepared you'll really need it.”

"I'm so close to hitting you, Steve." 

"I bet your swing sucks." 

Danny shakes his head in amusement."You wouldn't be the first person who's been proven wrong, babe." 

"How about instead of hitting me, I'll hold your hand, so you know, you won't be too tempted to take a swing." 

"You're not smooth at all. But sure," Danny says just as Steve reaches out for his hand to take, and leads them to walk around New York like a couple going for dinner. 

————————————————

When Danny followed Steve to the destination for their date, he was very engrossed on the muscles of Steve’s back flexing to really pay any attention to where they were, but as soon as his foot touched soft sand he awoke from his reverie. 

“What’s this, a beach?”

“Yes.”

“Why are we on the beach?” Danny questions, since he’s hoping that there only here because Steve just wanted to take a quick look. And if that's the only reason they walked around that far, he'd like to strangle Steve for making him walk that far. 

“This is our date spot.” Steve says it like its obvious. 

"It's freaking cold outside." 

"I'll keep you warm." 

“We are on the beach wherein everyone can see us.”

“Nah, this is an enclosed part of the beach. Plus, as you said, it's too cold, so not a lot of people come to the beach now.”

Danny wanted to implode at Steve's logic, but instead he sags a little and goes along with it.

"I don't even have slippers."

"Just go barefoot. Sand is not that bad to walk on." 

“You know I nice restaurant would have been nice,” Danny suggests in a pleading tone. 

“I thought so too, but since you told me you’ve never been on the beach here… well I thought I should take you here. It’s why I was secretive about it.”

“Smart of you, but you’re still not getting me to swim, Steve, which I think is the main reason you brought me here.”

“Of course, whatever you say, Danno,” Steve says as he grabs Danny’s hand once Danny finishes removing his boat shoes, holding on to them with his left hand. Steve moves them towards a spot on the beach that for some reason has a large blue blanket setup with a brown basket in the center. 

A strange part of Danny starts to thrum inside his veins a little. “Wow. You really are a romantic.”

“What? Too much?” Steve asks as he reclines on the blanket, waiting for Danny to join. 

“Nope, nope, it’s nice.” Danny assures him as he sits down and places his shoes and socks besides the blanket. 

“Good, cause I was seriously doubting myself.”

“Well doubt no more, it's not a bore. Look at that, it rhymed didn't it?" Danny joked. 

Steve gave a regretful sigh. “That was a horrible rhyme."

"Yeah not by best work surely I'll work on my next jest." 

"Oh my god. Are you ever going to let me live that down?" 

Danny gave short laugh at Steve's expense. “Hell no. It’s good to get ammunition like that this early in a relationship.”

Steve raised his eyebrows only slightly. “So you’ve had a lot of experience with relationships?”

Danny rebuttals easily. “You could say that, or I just have common sense. Now stop talking, let’s eat.” Danny said deflecting the inevitable question that Danny’s has had an abundance of anecdotal experience on relationships. It’s mostly resides in the sexual part, but Steve doesn’t have to know that part. Steve seems to not notice, and lets go of the questioning.

Steve opens up a picnic small brown basket that Danny noticed just now. He takes out a plastic bowl filled with salad.

“Of course, always with the greens. You have croutons as well?” Danny deadpans.

“Salt-pepper or garlic flavour?”

"Of course," groaned Danny. “What else is in there, Steve. Besides your rabbit food.”

“A burger sound nice to you?”

“Yes. Absolutely. Condiments?”

“Ketchup or mustard or relish?”

“All of them,” Danny says taking the burger from Steve’s hand. Danny notices it still warm and wrapped in tinfoil, giving Danny reason  to think it's home made.

Danny's confused as to how all this food was kept fresh in one picnic basket. "We took a 30 minute walk here, how is this still warm?" 

"Asked a friend to make it for us and place it here around a few minutes before we made it," explained Steve. 

"That's a really loyal friend of yours, Steve. To just go to a beach and meticulously know where to place it exactly." 

"Nah. He just owes me big time since I helped him out with his business once." 

Danny nods at Steve's answer." Okay." Danny goes to take a bite for his burger after it's been properly dressed, and is about to bite down on it when Steve stops him. 

“Wait,” Steve says while he looks for something in the picnic basket. Danny waits to eat his burger, ignoring his stomachs protests. When Steve finds what he’s looking for he takes out a pair of candles.

“Candles? Wow, Steve, you know how to make a guy feel special,” Danny jokes at the little sentiment that Steve made, but it secretly warms his heart that he'd actually done something so sweet. 

“Now you can eat,” Steve says when he’s done lighting up the candle sticks. The sun was probably going to go down after a few minutes so the candles will make do for a decent light source.

Steve eyes Danny with a face in-between aneurysm face and constipated face as he looks at him splattering ketchup and mustard all over his triple sized burger. “That’s disgusting.”

“No, greased frog legs are gross, babe. This,” Danny says pointing to his burger slathered with ketchup and mustard, “is normal.” Danny takes a big bite of his large burger and chews with his mouth open, just to annoy Steve.

Danny gulps down his food before asking. “You have any…”

Steve seems to understand what Danny needs, and searches inside the basket. He takes out two unfamiliar bottles of brew, hands them to Danny.

“Longboard?” Danny gives it a skeptical glance. "Is this home made or something? I've never heard of this brand." 

“It’s Hawaiian. I get a box of it from a friend of mine who lives in Maui.”

“Do you always give your date’s spiked beer?”

“What?” Steve asks confused.

“I don’t know Steve,” Danny eyes him suspiciously, “you take me to a remote location, play along as a date, give me a suspicious beer bottle that’s probably filled with valium to knock me out, then you kill me and throw me in the water. Was that your entire game plan, or am I missing something?" Danny's joking, but he feels like Steve doesn't know him that well to know for sure. 

“No- It might seem like that- I’m not going to kill you-NO! NO!” Steve said, putting his hands to make a big ‘X.’

Danny shook his head at amusement, breaking his charade. “Are you always this easy to mess with?”

“You suck, you know that.”

“Come on babe, I was just joking. You don’t seem like the serial killer type, more of the stalker type.”

"I didn't stalk you, Danny. I'm a gentlemen in every way." 

“Yeah a big ol' gentlemen," Danny says as he takes a bite out of his burger. "Who has nice taste in burgers because this is delicious." 

"I know," Steve says agreeing. "My friend, Joe, makes a mean veggie burger." 

"Veggie? It taste like beef?" 

"That's the weird thing. It taste like beef but it isn't really. It's strange but good for you." 

"I can't believe you got me to eat healthy, Steve. Gross. I need a drink." Danny tries to open his bottle, but it's clamped on too tight, he can't open it. 

“Let me help.”

“I can do it,” he says defiantly.

“Just let me, Danny.”

“I said to let me do this, Steven.” Danny says tugging the bottle cap as hard as he can. “What the hell do you Hawaiians do with your beer bottles? Reinforce them with super glue?”

He eventually gives up, and hands the bottle to Steve. Who takes the cap off with ease Danny finds impossible to believe. 

“Thanks,” Danny mumbles incoherently.

“You’re welcome,” Steve answers smugly.  

“So, what else do you do? Besides sell cheese.” Danny asks casually, eating another bite of his burger, and taking a swig of the somewhat decent brew.

“I own a farm,” Steve answers back. 

 “I didn’t picture you as a farmer. So you live on the outskirts?" 

“Yeah I do. But I’m not really a farmer, Danny. I inherited the farm from my Kuku wahine.” Steve says knocking Danny out of his pornographic thoughts to decipher the strange word.

“Your…” said Danny as he rolled his hand in a circular formation, waiting for Steve to explain.

“It means Grandmother.”

“Danny nods at his explanation. 

“What about you? Why’d you become a chef?”

“Would you believe me if I said that I wanted to become a cop, and not a chef, at first?”

“You look like you had potential, well besides your height.”

“Har de har har, McGarrett. For you information I did awesome in the academy. I wanted to be a great cop, a detective if you want to be specific, you know protecting people and saving their asses from the criminally insane."

"So why didn't you?" 

Danny gave a solemn look to Steve. He didn't like explaining the circumstances of his expulsion, but Danny felt it happened so long ago that it shouldn't really matter to him anymore.

"I was supposed to finish off my last month at the academy when people found out about me being gay… I was kicked out, and I was humiliated.” Danny kicks the sand on his feet, remembering his time there. “Apparently the headmaster there was a bigot and wouldn’t allow me to graduate. He spread rumors about me being a bad cop or corrupt, said I couldn't be trusted as an actual cop,” Danny adds with a bitter twist of his lips. “It was shitty deal life handed me. After that it was pretty pointless to try and be a cop. Everywhere I went I was denied job offers. No one would accept me. Who knew the force could be so abrasive to gays.” He shouldn't really be surprised by it, but he'd always wanted to act like an optimist, used to think that the world was just filled with good people and the only terrible ones were his family.

It was so much easier to believe life was like that. 

Steve agreed with what Danny was saying so far, nodding for him to continue.

“… after that I came here to New York to get out of it, too many bad memories in Jersey. It’s not that bad here, though. I still wanted to be a cop at that time, but I felt like if I was moving here to be a new person, I should change my career too. I don’t like reliving past mistakes, I guess you could say. It'd be too hard to be rejected again. Besides I've accomplished many other great achievement by being a chef, and not being a cop wasn't the worst thing to happen to me.”

"You own a great restaurant, Danny. I can see that whatever you decided to do was a good choice on your life." 

"Thank you, Steve." 

“And I can get that, I think. I mean I've never really been oppressed in that way, since I've mostly been with woman, but I'm sorry you've struggled.”

“You actually think in that brain?” Danny teases trying to forget about his past life with a quick remark. "Some times I think it'd be easier if I could be straight, or bi even. I'd like my life to just be simpler."

"Don't say that, Danny." 

"I'm not being self deprecating. I'm just admitting a simple truth." 

“Well if you were, attracted to females, that is, then you and I wouldn’t be so interested in doing this,” Steve says moving closer to where Danny has situated himself on the blanket.

 _Oh_ , Danny thinks. Steve’s leaning to him, and so does Danny, eyes closing and lips almost brushing, noses touching, and their breaths mingling with each other’s. Danny chest swells with a warm sensation, it’s making him sweat with nervousness. Steve is getting so close that-

“Fire!”

“Fire?” Danny asks confused, pulling away from Steve's face, the situation becoming less intimate. The warm sensation growing in his chest becomes painful it sears his flesh with the sensation.

Steve grabs Danny by the waist so suddenly that Danny’s probably going to get a crick in his neck, or possibly whiplash.

“Whoa! What are you doing? Let go of me McGarrett!  You don’t manhandle me like this!” Danny yells, but once he hears Steve feet splashing in the water he starts to really shout. “Oh hell no Steve!”

 “You’re tie is on fire Danno.”

“There’s something called stop drop and-” Danny never finishes his sentence, because he’s suddenly thrown in the water.

Danny is dazed a little in the water, but he stands up and gives dagger eyes at Steve. “Steven! What the hell? You didn’t need to throw me in the fucking water!

“Your tie was on fire, Danno.” Steve repeats the same phrase again. “What was I supposed to do? Let you burn?”

“There were other ways Steve! You’re a fucking neanderthal animal you know that?”

“No, I really don’t know Danno.” Steve said, shaking his head in boisterous laughter. 

“So you saw my tie on fire, and you thought that the most appropriate thing was to  _throw me in the water_!” Danny’s entire body is soaked, his shirt clinging tightly to his chest. Danny can already feel himself shivering from the cold water. 

Steve gives a slight shrug, and then he bursts out laughing when a wave knocks Danny over, drenching him even further.  "Jesus it's cold."

Danny eyed Steve, he would not let this go without proper repercussions. So he rips of his wet, expensive buttoned on shirt, and flings it at Steve’s general direction, somewhat regretting it almost immediately knowing he's only wearing a tank-top. “Does the water feel nice, Steve?” Danny asked as his shirt lands head first into Steve’s head. Danny's still got good aim and the gobsmacked look Steve made was enough to make it worth losing a layer in the cold water. 

“That’s it. It’s on!” Steve raced into the shore, diving in the water like a torpedo, his main target being Danny. 

Danny tried his hardest to swim out of the way, but Steve was pretty fast in the water. 

In what seemed like seconds Steve grabbed Danny by the ankles, putting him off balance a bit. 

“Let go of my leg, McGarrett.” Danny sputtered, spitting water out of his mouth.

“I’m not letting go. This is revenge, D.”

“Your singed my tie! And ruined my hair!” Danny adds in a pleading, weak tone. 

Maybe Steve didn’t hear it or he doesn’t care, because Danny is still being hefted off of his legs, making him really lose his balance and fly’s backwards, creating a big splash into the water.

Danny tried to get his footing, but the added weight of water his jeans was making it hard to swim. Danny was panicking when he couldn’t get his footing on the ocean floor. Shit.  They must have been deeper in the water then he originally thought. A hysterical part of him thought he was going to drown, and he was deeply going to make Steve pay in the after life. 

“Danno I’ve got you,” Steve said as he grabbed one of Danny’s flailing arms. “Don’t worry.”

Danny held on, and pulled himself closer to Steve. He didn’t really notice how close he was to Steve’s face until he regained proper breathing function. He breathed in heavily and clung to Steve like a life preserver.

“Hey,” Steve croaked.

“Fuck,” Danny breathed out in relief.

He doesn’t really know how it happened, but suddenly his hands were on Steve’s face. Then he slowly, but surely, kissed him properly this time. 

Steve took only a few minutes to respond properly. They kiss moving back and forth. It was kind of sloppy and more saltier then Danny liked, but Jesus McGarrett made up for that with his restless tongue. 

“Finally,” Steve gasp’s out as he bites playfully at Danny’s lower lip like it's personally offended him.

“You were waiting for that?" Danny questioned, a bit dazed, but delighted.          

“Yes.” Steve gasped as he brought Danny’s mouth to his in another bruising, frantic kiss.

“You’re. An. Idiot,” Danny got out in-between their kisses that were slowly driving Danny fucking mad with want. 

If they spent some time swimming in the ocean, no one but Steve and Danny were wary of that fact, because Danny for the likes of him would never in a million years think of going to the beach, but Steve seems to have destroyed that notion altoghther, and has made it happen in the few days that they’ve known one another. It’s a lot to say how much Steve is affecting Danny’s life now since no ones made him go to the beach, and certainly not in this way. 

They eventually get out since the waters still a little cold to really enjoy. It was a little relaxing though to be in the freezing water, but Danny knew that had more to do with the fact he was swimming with Steve in particular, than him just simply swimming and wading in the water. It gave Danny a bit of adrenaline rush that it kind of numbed off the cold feeling for a bit. 

But once Danny and Steve got out of the water, they immediately went to dry off with the towels Steve brought. He also seemed to think ahead and brought out two pairs of underwear, sweatpants and shirts, handing one of each to Danny, who gave Steve an intense glare. 

“You knew this was going to happen, didn't you?” Danny says accusingly. “ _You neanderthal animal_.”

“It doesn't hurt to be prepared,” was what Steve said with a shrug of his shoulders. "But to be perfectly honest with you I didn't think it would happen that way. Here I'll give you the comforter to keep warm."

"Oh god," Danny uttered in slight disbelief. "Just watch it, McGarrett, otherwise I'm gonna end up in a hospital because of you," Danny warned as he wrapped the comforter around him, to keep him warm. 

"I'll always protect you, Danny. You don't have to worry." 

"You trying to  _protect_  me is what got us in the ocean, Steve. The cold and very harsh ocean."

"You weren't complaining, that much." 

"So not the point." 

"Just put on the damn pants." 

Steve gets his pants and underwear on in one quick stride, and soon his shirt is on, being completely dressed in mere seconds. 

Getting the pants on was harder than it should have been, Danny doesn’t seem to share the same quality of efficiency as Steve.

He notices that Steve was watching him as he stood stark naked on the beach as he put on one of Steve's underwear. “Are you looking at my ass, McGarrett?" 

Steve blushes when he snaps his head in to focus, looking at Danny apologetically, and then looking at the ocean with laser point focus. "I never said you couldn't," Danny says to Steve, "it is a nice ass." 

"Yeah," Steve admits quickly. "Um. It's okay, Danny... I think I got an eyeful already."

Danny just smirks. "How noble of you." 

The sweatpants are also too long for him when he finally puts them on, touching the floor a bit, but he fixes that by rolling them folding them over and the faded blue polo shirt fits him snugly, making him feel very comfortable, so Danny counts it as a win overall. 

“Are you going to walk me home now, Steven?” Danny hates that they're going to walk back for 30 minutes, but he can deal if he can walk with Steve. 

“Who says the date is over?” Steve says while he collects all of their wet clothing, the large picnic blanket and comforter, and putting them into the large brown basket. Danny raises his eyebrows, but doesn't give Steve a response just yet as he helps with throwing away all the food wrappings and bottles into the recycling bin.

“It’s not?” Danny asks once he's done with his part of cleaning up." 

“Not at all. Still one more thing I have to show you.”

“Is it going to be another secret?” Danny whines.

“Come on.”

“I am done walking with you, Steve."

“Normal people walk, Danny.”

“Not this much for a date. Don't you have a car?"

“Just come on,” Steve says again, grabbing Danny’s hand. “It’s not that very far.” He hefts the large basket in his hands, and lugs it with ease as he and Danny walk out the beach together. 

“Is that a promise?” Danny says once he places his shoes on, and so does Steve, when they finally are on solid pavement again. 

“Promise,” Steve says seriously. “I promise you it's only going to take 5 minutes at most, then we can call a cab to head home.”

"Okay fine." 

Danny was expecting something big when he and Steve finally got to the secret location again. Like a park area with fire dancers or a secret underground rave party entrance, or even a majestic fountain display. 

Danny was not expecting to see a small ice cream truck situated in a tiny corner of the road. 

“We never did have dessert." 

“I guess we didn’t,” Danny amends to that as he and Steve walk towards the stand. 

"I couldn't really decide on one to bring, but I figured since this place was so close and serves good desserts, so I thought I'd bring you to it,” Steve explains to Danny.

"Reminds you of Hawaii?" guessed Danny. 

"Yeah," Steve confessed with a grin. 

When they step closer to the stand that Danny realizes who the big guy on the counter top is. “Kamekona, is that you?”

“Steve! Danny?” Kamekona said in surprise. “It’s nice to see you guys.”

“You go here regularly?” Steve asks disappointed, like he wanted to surprise Danny with shaved ice and flavoured syrup.

“No. I don’t,” Danny says honestly, “I just know him from somewhere else.”

“Yah, me and Danny go to meetings together,” Kamekona adds.

“About what?” Steve tried to ask Danny, but was interrupted by Kamekona emphatically telling them all of their flavours and specials they were having. 

But Danny was very much grateful for the distraction because Steve seemed to brush it off as nothing, and didn't ask Danny to explain it again. 

"So what do you guys want? We have wide selection of ice cream and shaved ice." 

Danny didn't really know why he was thinking of only choosing to get shaved ice. Some ice cream would have been better off, but Danny felt more inclined to get the shaved ice instead.

It's totally not because Steve wanted him to get it too. It was Danny's free will to get whatever he wanted. He just so happened to want shaved ice along with Steve. 

“So what do you guys want on your ice?" he asked as he listed off a bunch of more flavours: "I have strawberry kiwi, lemon; pink or yellow, blueberry, raspberry, pineapple…” Kamekona went off on another list before Steve ordered for a mango papaya and Danny ordered simple blueberry.

“Here you guys go, that would be around 4.50$.” Kamekona said as he handed them there sugary concoctions. 

“I’ll pay,” Danny announced.

“No, I’ll pay.” Steve said stubbornly.

“No you don’t, Steven. I can pay for this.”

“Fine, if you insist.” 

Danny takes out his wallet and pays off the fee. Kamekona gives him a strange smile when he passes the bills to him, which leads Danny to awkwardly smile back, too. 

“So you gonna take me home, now?” Danny asks as they walk out of Kamkekona’s stand and say goodbye to him. He gives them a curt wave before yelling at one of his employees in the truck to get back to work.  

“Bossy as always.” Steve teases. “Yes I will, Danno. Come on.”  

Steve heads to the side of the road before Danny, trying hail for a cab to come.

"Steve, wait." Danny grabs on to Steve's raised arm. He doesn't know whats brought up this change, but Danny concludes that he doesn't really want this date to end so soon. He may act like that's what he wants, but now that it's actually happening, them leaving, Danny doesn't want that. He'd would rather like to spend more time with Steve, as much as possible. 

"What is it, Danny?" 

"I think I'll be willing to walk." Danny knows that it's a bitch on his knee to walk so much, but he also knows that walking with Steve is a far better option. 

"Really?" Steve asks kind of bewildered. "I thought you didn't like walking." 

"I can choose when to or when not to like things. And I choose to like walking, specifically with you now." 

Steve gave him a quirky smile. "Alright, lets go." 

When they segue to a path, they have idle chit chat, talking Steve’s farm, and the tribulations of old school cheese making, but how it’s worth it to get that authentic taste for his customers. Danny in return tells him more stories about his restaurant, how he found it by accident,  his successful life being a chef and how he loves that he loves making people happy by giving them food to share and enjoy.

It’s nice to know that Steve seems to share the same ideals about making food. Actually it makes Danny ecstatic with pride for this man. He's never met someone so invested in culinary or hospitality as Steve is.  

Danny stops at a trash can to throw away his shaved ice. He tries to eat all of it so he doesn’t have to carry the sticky mess anymore, but regrets it when he gets a brain freeze.

“Is my tongue blue?” Danny asks once they’re both done with the shaved ice. He sticks out his tongue for Steve to look at.

Steve gives a chuckle and says, “yes, your entire tongue is blue actually.”

“I hate it when this happens.” Danny tries to get the colouring out of his mouth, rubbing it off with his palate, making weird faces as he does. 

“Let me help,” Steve says in a husky laugh. 

“Please tell me you aren’t doing what I think your-“

Danny can’t finish his sentence because Steve is holding on to Danny's face, kissing Danny, his tongue frolicking back and forth with Danny's in a strange attempt at cleaning Danny's mouth. It's filthy and uses way too much tongue for Danny's liking, but he's hardly complaining because any kiss from Steve lights him up with a want he's never had before. It's this need to get more, to want more from Steve that he can't say not to. 

“Now your tongue is blue.” Danny smiles when Steve sticks out his slightly blue-ish tongue.

“It was worth it though,” Steve says cheekily, "your tongue isn't that blue now."

“Thank you for your noble efforts,” Danny proclaimed in carefree voice. 

"You're welcome." 

They both walk silently down the road, the only sounds that can be heard is the sound of cars beeping, and the slight buzz of electricity from the pole lights above them. Danny doesn't even have to ask as he stealthily creeps his hands towards Steve's, holding on to his as they walk the pavement. Steve's gives him a gentle shove to the shoulder, smiling as he grips Danny's hand a little tighter. 

It's a nice walk in New York even without talking to one another. 

“So, was it a good date?” Steve asks when they both stop at Danny’s door step. Rachel seems to have left the house judging that the windows are closed and the lights have gone dark.

Danny wants to say, ‘I’ve had better,’ (or ‘much safer dates’) when really he hasn’t.

He hasn’t had a date that had Danny feeling this woozy with adrenaline and endorphins. But Danny stops himself, since it would raise the question of who exactly Danny has dated. So he chooses the safer option.

“Well I know now that you aren’t actually a serial killer.”

“That’s nice.” Steve pouts. Obviously it wasn’t the reply he was looking for.

“It was our first date, McGarrett. I need more than one date to be able to properly evaluate your courtship skills.” Danny really hates to be that person to only give half-truths, but he’s got no choice. “But I do know that your kissing skills are, ugh, are abundantly expert.”

Steve gives a sheepish smile. 

“Oh there’s definitely going to be another one,” Steve says perking up. “That is if you want one?” Steve asks a bit unsure. 

“Yes, Steve. I’d really like that.”

Steve gives him a blinding white smile.  Danny knows for sure that that smile is going to be the death of him. “I'm glad to hear that," Steve says when he takes a step backwards, away from Danny's door, an act to not seem imposing. 

“Let’s just hope it’s not a secret date this time.” Danny mouth curls into a small smile. “And no candle lights!” Danny adds as an extra stipulation. He raises his burnt tie as an example.

Steve gives him another short laugh. “Got it, Danno. I’ll call you about the details tomorrow?”

“Okay around 3, when I’m on my break. Good night. I'll see you soon, Steve." 

“Good night, Danno.” 

"And Steve." 

He turns around, looking at Danny with raised brows. 

"I... I really enjoyed this date, Steve. And I very much like you, you damn goof." He needed to admit it. God he really did. 

"The feelings still mutual, Danny."

"I had hoped so." 

"Alright. So goodbye this time?" Steve said as a cab came rolling on the road. Danny waved his hands in reply which led Steve to open the cab door, putting the basket in first, then looking back at Danny for a little bit before he entered the cab. 

Danny had given a mumble of a reply to his goodbye. Steve probably not hearing it at all since he entered the cab without another word. 

"I really wanted you to stay," Danny finishes in a final murmur, saying what he wanted to say to Steve, but too afraid to, all alone by himself as the cab drove away. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still looking for a willing beta!!! Open for that so anyone can contact me through comments on this fic and I'd be willing to give you my mock e-mail.


	7. Fate Gets A Punch To The Face

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just know that all medical crap/jargon/proper procedure or about couvade syndrome in this fic or is very much debatable to its legitimacy. 
> 
> also i'd like to point out that i don't have italian or german friends to help with translation... so i'm really sorry if i butchered your language in google translates

“I swear Rachel is seeing things,” Danny tells himself, trying to act positive, and also trying his hardest not to panic. “Okay, put your feet on it Williams and just check for sure.”

He puts his feet on it, and the number reads 160.

“What the hell? Twenty pounds more, that can’t be right,” Danny whispers to himself stunned.

He’s on the weight scale, and it’s telling Danny that he’s gained 20 pounds over the course of a few weeks. Danny knows that he couldn’t gain that much weight, his diet had only consisted of water and coffee this past week, and sharing meals with Steve when he insisted that Danny needed sustenance. And Danny is 100% sure they were made out of tree-bark and nuts. He shouldn’t be gaining this much weight unless he’s been working out and gaining muscle definition, but he hasn’t been to the gym either.

Steve seems to have noticed as well since he threw out all of Danny’s takeout, and replaced it with vegetables, tofu and whole wheat bread. Danny hates him with a burning passion.

Danny also seems to be getting edgier for some reason. He can’t seem to help but get random boners every time he thinks of Steve or sneezes. It’s been rather hard to work properly at the Restaurant, or when Danny is walking down the street, or walking in the park. Danny’s has been puking in the mornings a lot more. And he’s also noticed how his sleep patterns have been even shittier than normal. It’s kind of scaring him.

Which is the reason to why Danny decides to go to the clinic. Deciding that a week filled with lack of sleep, puking, strange boners and extreme gain weight means that Danny has contracted some kind of serious illness or is probably dying.

Which is very typical for Danny's luck.

He pulls into the clinic and a waits for them to call his name and then Danny’s is sitting on one of the doctor’s examination table, and waits for the Doctor to arrive. Danny doesn’t sit around for long, it’s too boring, and he can’t seem to sit still.

He doesn't know why he needs to move around so much in a Doctor’s office. He just needs to otherwise he’s going to have a panic attack. Danny starts to look around the pristine and sterile room, playing around with the model sized brain sculpture. The door finally opens after 40 minutes of waiting.

“Please don’t touch that model replica of the human brain Mr…, ” the Doctor says looking at the papers,”…Williams.”

“Sorry,” Danny says putting back sculpture back on its pedestal. He sits down again on the examination table. “And, ugh, yeah it's Williams.”

“What seems to be the problem then, Mr. Williams, and you may call me Max or Dr. Bergman.”

“Well, Max,” Danny says formally. “I seem to be gaining weight randomly, and I’ve been puking a lot in the mornings. Oh, and my sleeping patterns are getting hectic.

Max scribbles some stuff on his note pad.

“Any more abnormalities?”

“I-I have been a bit edgy.”

“Max raises his eyebrows. “What do you mean by, edgy?”

Danny shrugs. “Like I’ve been edgy.”

“That does not clear anything, Mr. Williams,” Max deadpans.

“I’ve been a lot hornier,” Danny admits.

Max doesn’t even flinch, just scribbles more on his paper. “I see.” He nods suddenly and then points the pen at Danny. “Could this not just be your partners doing?” Max asks questioningly.

“No… maybe. But I’ve never been this horny before, doc. Like whenever I see him I just want to do it right now - and we haven’t cause I want to take things slowly with our relationship -I literally have to masturbate 5 times every day to calm myself or else I’m just going to jump him. I am so edgy, and I wanna just fucking… I’ve been rambling too much, and you are probably uncomfortable.” Danny apologizes to Max.

Max for some reason seems to have had a full poker face through Danny’s entire rant, it eerily reminds him of Chin. “I see,” he says writing more stuff on his note pad. “Mr. Williams do you know anyone who may be pregnant?”

“What? Yes,” Danny asked confused as to how Max knew.

“Well from my guess, you seem to have an acute form of Couvade syndrome.”

“Couy-What?”

“It’s means sympathetic pregnancy.” Dr. Bergman says. “It is a… peculiar mental disorder. It seems to affect mostly partners, close friends or relatives-”

“You mean basically anyone who is close to the one who is pregnant.”

“Yes. It usually happens around the 2nd trimester of the benefactor’s pregnancy, but symptoms could present themselves earlier than that.”

“Wait,” Danny says bringing his palm out to stop Max from talking. “Wait, wait, you think I’m pregnant, because I’m close to Rachel!?” Danny asked baffled by what the Doctor is telling him.

“No, that is not at all what I am saying. What I am saying is that you being Rachel’s close friend, and father of the baby, have caused a neurological placebo, if you think about it.”

Danny just blanked out with the medical jargon. "Okay so to summarize, you think I think that I'm pregnant."

Dr. Bergman sighed. “Your brain thinks you are pregnant, when in reality you are not,” Max clarifies.

“Okay.” Danny nods. “Just to be sure we got this straight. I am not pregnant.”

“That is highly illogical, Mr. Williams. You are simply just experiencing the symptoms and behavior of an expectant mother, you are not actually ever going to engage in birth.”

“Okay, that’s good. So no baby for me, right?”

“Yes. Unless you want us to test out your theory.” The doctor says it jokingly, but Danny can feel that their is some sort of avid curiosity behind it.

Danny face blanches, and his brain is making little tiny comments that, that is a reasonable idea.

Danny then has to wait another hour for the test results come back. Danny is very thankful that Max could make a quick, discreet assignment for it.

It's really all for the sake of Danny's sanity.

Danny lets out a sigh of relief when Max comes back with negative results of his non-existent pregnancy. It should be considered childish, because, Danny could never be pregnant, at least that what Max is saying and the results that are being shown to him.

He says a curt ‘thanks doc’ and leaves. Danny just shakes himself of the shame, and tries to forget about how embarrassing it was to ask a doctor to see if he was legitimately pregnant.

After Danny left the doctor’s office, he just decides to walk. He can’t believe that he’s actually going to experience this, how the hell is this possible? How can his mind think that he’s fucking pregnant. He feels like life just did a joke on him. What is he a puppet for laughs? God why is this his life? - his phone rings lightly in his pocket, knocking Danny out of his self-sardonic thoughts reverie.

It’s a new text from Steve, Danny ignores it. He doesn’t need to have an involuntary boner while walking down the street.

This couvade syndrome really sucks for Danny.

 

——————————————---------------------------

 

“I hate you,” Danny says the moment he sees Rachel.

“What obscene thing did I do that offended you this time. I mean you’re more wound up then I am.”

“You’re the reason to my horniness.”

Rachel just looked at him blankly, her eyes blinking owlishly at him. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Okay not exactly in that context, but I mea-”

“Is this your strange way of saying your straight now?” Rachel interjects with a appalled look on her face."

“No. Okay. You are not listening.”

“Because you’re not saying anything productive.”

“I have couvade syndrome because of you!” Danny yells this time. Everyone from the kitchen staff looks at Danny weirdly, like they’re going to contract the same thing if they go near him.

“You have what?” Rachel asked shocked, her face contorting into a wide grin, while she has a giggle fit, seeming to finally understand the situation better now. “You have couvade syndrome! Oh my god! That is too funny. I need to tell everyone this,” Rachel says as she grabs her phone.

Danny put both his hands to his face, trying not to scream in panic and shock. “You suck,” he says through his face.

“And you think you’re pregnant.” Rachel says another giggle fit coming back. “Now that I see it you have been getting a bit shabby on the sides, and you have bags under your eyes, too."

"So do you," Danny retorts heatedly.

"But at least I know how to cover them up."

“Get out. Get out of my restaurant Rachel. I don’t want to see your face in the next 10 years.” Danny says making shooing gestures at Rachel.

“Oh, I’m going to be texting mum about this tonight. She’s going to have a fit.”

Danny pushes Rachel out of his restaurant, her feet not moving so she slides of the floor with her flats. Danny is pushing from the back of the restaurant all the way to the front door. A few people look up to look at the commotion going on, but their mostly newcomers, not the regulars that are used to Danny and Rachel’s antics.

“Maybe Dad will send a postcard saying congratulations were having twins.”

“I don’t think it works that way.”

“How about fraternal twins?”

“I said out of my restaurant Edwards.”

He still hears Rachel’s laughter even after Danny has a hailed a cab for her, and tells the cab driver to take her to her house.

Danny resumes his morning schedule, and the day is pretty normal. He turns off his phone so that he no longer has to suffer permanent priapism from Steve, or embarrassing text messages from Rachel’s relatives.

It's too much for him really.

When his work-shift is done, he asks Trevor to watch the restaurant while he’s gone for the rest of the day. He feels like he should take a stroll down the park, usually he’d go back home, but Danny needs to talk to two certain people he hasn’t had the time to talk to yet. If he waits any longer they’re going to be really mad at him.

And Danny needs to talk to two normal people, that won’t tell him he has couvade syndrome, and laugh at his face for it.

 

—————————————

 

It’s weird not having the option of driving somewhere. When Danny had the Saturn, he could always drive somewhere instead of walking there, especially when his knee was keen on giving Danny a hard time.

But now he'd didn't have much option but to take a taxi. It something he doesn't like to do very often because he feels somewhat like he'll end up too dependent on it, and besides Danny prides himself with the fact that he can actually drive in New York.

He uses his seldom cane that he got out of his ratty closet so he could be able to walk place to place. It’s not as efficient, but Danny’s knee thanks it since it's been giving him some trouble now.

Danny walks all the way to Gadini’s and Giuseppe’s house, it’s a small complex area that's a few more blocks from where the market is.

The house is a nice brown colour, and they even have a small porch, that has a white picket fence around it. The house that they live in, on the outside, looks small, but in the inside is actually a decent size. But the one particular detail that's always boggled Danny's mind is that, for some reason, the tiny place has a rather garage nearly as big as the house, and that Giuseppe likes to keep all his cars in it.

Danny opens the small gate and enters it, entering the house and calling out their names.

“Hey Gad? Gus?” Danny said as he walks into their house easily.

Danny has stopped knocking on their door for years, and just enter when he wants to. It took many rants that Danny is their family and he should be invited to their home any time, that he shouldn't have to knock like he's not part of their family.

Though Danny was wary from time to time when going to Gadini and Giuseppe house since the last time he did it, he got more of an eyeful than he ever really wanted. So he always calls out, just in case. If there's no answer, Danny will just run away in abject horror.

“Hi Danny. He’s off in the garage, fixing up that car.”

Danny does not sigh in relief. He doesn't. He has that much respect for his elders. "Okay, good."

“Yep. I don’t understand you boys sometimes. What’s with your fixation on that piece of crap?”

Danny looked at Gadini and made a ‘why would you say that?’ gesture. “That car is a triple back Mercury Marquis!"

“Yes I heard it all the same from Giuseppe. It’s a 1967 Marquis, it is vintage at its finest,” Gadini says sarcastically.“You didn't live with him went he spent most of our life's savings on that Chevy Impala, okay, Danny. It was awful. "Gadini said with all the negativity he could muster. "Hes in the garage. Now let me cook in peace.” Gadini resumed his chopping and dropped some garlic cloves in the pot.

Danny gave him a cold stare, before speaking again. “Actually I came here to talk to both of you guys.”

Gadini raised his eyebrows at Danny, than stopped chopping. He washed his hands with the towel and draped it over his shoulder. He walked over a bit to the garage door and called for his boyfriend. “Guiseppy! We need you in the kitchen!”

“But I’m working on the car!”

“That’s not an excuse!”

“Yes it is!”

“No it’s not. Now stop yelling, the neighbors hate that, and get your ass over here!”

He heard a sigh, before a there was a disgruntled, “okay sweetheart!” Danny heard a sudden clank and then Giuseppe came rushing through the garage door a few minutes later, with greasy hands. Gadini gave him a disgusted look, throwing the towel at Giuseppe’s head.

“Clean yourself before you come in the house.”

“I didn’t find a towel, that’s why it took me so long.”

“I don’t get what it is with you and that car? You have a Maserati.” Gadini said with a tone of sarcasm. “If I recall it’s a little bit more modern and contemporary.”

“See. That’s exactly whats wrong with you, no appreciation to the old.”

“I fell in love with you didn’t I?” Gadini said wryly.

“Are you calling me old? Because I’m not, I’m only 6 years older than you-”

“That’s still anziano,” Gadini retorted sarcastically.

“Io non sono! Sei anima un anziano."

"No, non sono io, sei tu."

"Yet you're still my attaccabottoni!"

"Saukerl!" Gadini spites back with a grin.

“I’m having a kid! Danny yelled trying to get through the blasé lovers quarrel. Danny’s been one of the many witnesses to these fights. They nearly have them on a weekly basis. It should worry Danny that they fight so much about the most trivial of things, but over the years Danny has known them, he's realized it’s how they actually show affection. Even the fact that being together for so long that they could be mistaken as fathers, could not deter their passion and hard headed stubbornness. They act as if they’re a teenage couple, but their connection with each other couldn’t be disconnected how much they fought or got angry, they could never hate one another.

They were both meant for each other.

There’s also the underlying fact that Danny does not want to acknowledge that Gadini just likes to rile Giuseppe into angry sex.

Yep. Totally normal for these guys.

They both gave Danny shocked looks, before their faces smoothed out into smiles. Good. Danny at least stopped their fighting.

“Congratulations!” They both said in unison.

“That is wonderful news, Danny.” Giuseppe adds.

“Thanks,” Danny was about to smile at the two of them for their enthusiasm about his good news, when he gets two synchronized smacks to the head.

“Ow! What the hell was that for?”

“For not telling us sooner.”

“Who’s the guy you’ve been hiding from us, that you want to have kids with?” Gadini says. “I thought we were you friends, Danny. I’m hurt you didn't tell us about him.”

“Okay first,” Danny says bringing his pointer finger up.” I couldn’t tell you guys because... Rachel didn’t even know she was pregnant yet. And yes I'm having the child with Rachel, we did it via in vitro, and I just found out a few days ago, and you,” he points at Giuseppe. “You were gone for a week.”

"Oh." They both say to Danny.

“Secondly,” Danny says bringing out two digits. “There’s… no one. I’m going solo on the parenting thing.”

The both gave him blank faces. Danny really hates their disdain for Danny. Like they’re going to tell Danny how stupid he is.

“Are you…”

“Stupid!”

Danny was head on.

“Do you know how hard parenting is…”

“Without a partner?”

It’s extremely unsettling when Gadini and Giuseppe are in a rant they seem to end each other’s sentences. It’s like they share the same mind, which might not be that far off since they seem to share almost everything.

“Do you know how hard it is raising a kid? How difficult it is? And you’re raising the kid by yourself, do you know how much stress that is? Being a single parent is not…”

They both give Danny glares through the entirety of the rant. Geeze. Now he knows how Rachel feels. But Danny knows what he is doing, he reacted the same way as they did. He agrees with Rachel about this, that she actually has a good point with this whole pregnancy debacle she's put him through. It's worth it for Danny in the long haul.

“Hey. Am I getting any younger am I?” Danny said emphatically. “No I am not. And I wasn’t waiting around for a guy to come after me, hell no! There’s not some fairy tale story ending waiting for me. This is real life, and sometimes people don’t always find the love! Sometimes people get screwed over by life, and they ruin their chances at it.” Danny was yelling now, he was just so frustrated. And he knew well enough where this anger was coming from.

They both gave Danny hard stares. Still not understanding what he was saying.

“Was waiting a for a few more years that bad?"

“Is this really what you want?”

"Look I get that you guys found love for each other, real, pure love for each other. It's awesome... but you have to realize that I may not end up happy like you guys. But I'll still be happy on my own, I'm having my own kid, remember. I won't be alone anymore."

They both dropped their tandem glares. Instead giving Danny sympathetic stares.

“And I was not giving up a chance to be a father for some bullshit knight in shining armor, okay? I wanted to experience fatherhood… I wanted a family. If I waited any longer than I may have never tried to do this with Rachel.”

“Oh, Danny, we didn’t mean it like that. You’d make an excellent father. We know it.”

“I heard all that stuff from Rachel,” Danny says absently, because he might be tearing up a bit. Danny should probably tell them quickly and get out before he starts balling. "I get it alright, guys. I appreciate you caring about my life and this baby dilemma, but I really do want this kid, and I really thought about it and I'm going to go through with it. I may not find love again, but I think I'm happy to sacrifice that if I can have my baby."

"You're a strong one, Danny. It's wonderful thing your going to do for your kid. I'm sorry for that outburst."

"Yeah, sorry about that, but you did just spring this on us all of a sudden."

"Ugh, not to be rude again, but I have to tell you another thing as well."

"Please tell me you didn't get Kono pregnant, too." Guiseppe says jokingly. Gadini gives a laugh.

Danny rolls his eyes. “I just wanted to tell you guys that I wanted for you to be the Godfathers. I already went over it in my head, no one would be better suited to raise my kid than you guys.”

“We’d love to be. We could teach the kid how to cook.”

“Teach him or her proper Italian, too.” Giuseppe pipes in.

“I’d like that. You guys can be the cool uncles.” Danny says with a smidge of sarcasm. He feels kind of awkward after he’s finally done what he came here to say.

"We're sorry we ganged up on you like that. It's just very difficult to understand how you can do this alone."

"It'll work for me. I can make it alone."

“You should stay for dinner,” Gadini says holding on to Gus hand.

"We can work on details about a nursery. Maybe we can make you a crib, you know how well Gadini is at woodworking."

"I can make you a crib," Gadini agrees while nodding.

"That sounds great and all, but I'm already full."

“You’re sure?”

“Yup.” Danny says curtly. “I’m just going to go now. And yeah we can decide on that for sure. I'd be happy to have a custom made crib for the nursery room.”

"Yeah, just give us a call if you really want us to. I can start as soon as possible."

He gets up from where he was propped on the island chair and makes way to the door, thanking them for their time and service. "Bye guys," Danny says just as he's about to leave their door.

“Danny, I think you should take a chance with him.”

Danny paused, thinking about what he was saying.“No- What?“ Danny mumbled, slowly realizing what Gadini was saying. "I got no chance with him, Gad."

“Do not lie to me, Daniel. I can tell when you’re lying, I know you very well. This Steve guy seems more to you than just a date. You really do love him, and if you give him a chance, he may end up loving you too.”

"It's not a question about love, Gad, it's about commitment."

"Love is the greatest commitment, Danny."

“It’s not important. Once he finds out I’m having a kid he’s going to leave. He won't commit to that, not with me anyways."

“You don’t know that Danny.”

“You’re right I don’t know that, because I barely know the guy. It's moot to try an relationship with him. I'll see you soon." Danny begins to leave the house, and move out into the porch area, where he begins to walk down the steps. He assumes that the conversation is over but he hears the door opening behind him.

“It's not moot to try," Gadini said a little loudly from where he was on the porch. "It wouldn’t hurt for you to take a risk with the guy. You're going on a date with him again aren't you?" Danny gave a quick nod to Gadini's question, looking at him from the porch. "So tell him, and make your relationship work."

"The worst you can do is just give up on him.” Giuseppe says finishing Gadini’s words as he comes up behind him, putting his hand on his shoulder.

"You guys have read too many harlequin novels to actually believe that's a sound plan," Danny deadpans back to them.

"So what if I'm a hopeless romantic?" Gadini says scornfully.

"Thats' exactly your problem."

"Take my advice and just go hang out with the hunk and see what happens."

 

—————————————---------------------------

 

Once he checked off talking with Gadini and Giuseppe from his to-do list, which for Danny’s part was way more exhausting then it should have been. He had cleared most of his afternoon schedule. He walked the park.

It wasn’t something that Danny usually did, he tended to be upset in the confines of his home, but for once Danny wanted a change in scenery when he brooded in silence.

Danny walked for what seemed for only minutes until he suddenly realized it was nearly 9. He always seemed to forget how big New York city is and how easily one could get lost in it. Danny knows, he has experiences of calling Rachel to pick him up when he walked to some skeezy part of town.

But Danny knew where he was, there wasn't much to worry, he wasn't even that far from his house. It was only a couple of blocks away.

Danny got the unnerving feeling that he was being watched; he almost had the sense that Steve was stalking him.

That is until he got grabbed by both arms, and pulled into a white van. Danny tried to yell for help, but was cupped with a firm hand to his mouth. Danny has the belying, hysterical regret that Steve really should have stalked him this time.

At least then he could have saved him by running in front of the van or do the sane thing and have called the police for back-up. Danny doesn't know why he thinks the former is probably the reasonable thing Steve would do in that situation.

Danny is in hysterics and he's thinking about Steve when his untimely demise is about to happen. He really needs to figure out his priorities. --------------------

“Calm down, brah, it’s us.” A voice said putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

Danny sighed in relief, before anger swooped in. “You Hawaiians are all certifiable!” Danny yells once Danny is seated in the cab of the car. “You are all crazy! What the hell are you thinking kidnapping me?!”

“It is time,” one of the Hawaiians said. Danny isn’t very familiar with most of the faces in the council. The only ones he can name by memory are Chin, Kamekona and Amy.

“Time for what? For you to all go to the psyche ward!?”

“The ritual of Haumea has started,” Chin says very seriously.

“Seriously you guys kidnapped me for that stupid initiation thing? You know you guys could have called like normal people!”

“Wouldn’t have been as fun, plus Kamekona says we have to surprise you when we bring you to his place.”

“I think he meant to not tell me where you were leading me, not give me a fucking heart attack!"

“Chill down, this is part of the ritual, Danny. Now be quiet.”

"And why the hell are you here, Kono? You don’t have a kid.”

"I'm here for support, and I didn't have much to do on my day off."

"Why the hell did I hire you. You are the worst employee ever."

“I brought tape just in case.” Kono pipes in.

“You are all insane! You are all fucking insane, and I’m regretting the day you told me about this council meeting Kono! I knew you did this for some ulterior motiv-”

“Whatever you say, hoale.” Kono says as she tears open a roll of tape.

He whimpers.

 

—————————————

 

Danny is taken to Kamekona’s place and then lead into his backyard. Which is to say twice as large as the house.

“We got Danny.” Kono says ripping of the tape from Danny’s mouth.

“Ughh! Fuck did that hurt!” Danny yells as he rubs his mouth to soothe it. 

“Good. Now everyone must leave!” Kamekona howls in the dark. Danny has to stop for a second to look at Kamekona, who looks as though he has been spit through a lei monsters mouth. He's adorned a lei around his neck along with his lei shirt and shorts. 

Everyone nods, and they leave quietly. Kono gives Danny a smirk before turning around and following the others.

"‘It’s not a cult, they said. 'This is just an initiation, nothing more, they said. 'Don’t sweat over it, brah,’ Danny thinks loudly and angrily as he sits down in front of Kamekona on the grass.

“I know that you are upset, Danny, but this is important to us.”

“That is the understatement of the year. I am not upset okay, I am mortified! I was dragged here in a fucking white van! And now I am sitting here waiting for more humiliation!” Danny feels his vein throbbing in his neck.

"You must calm down." Kamekona says soothingly, trying to calm Danny's ire.

“Can’t I just skip this,” Danny try’s but knows he’ll fail.

“No, now come on, we are taking a walk.” Kamekona rises, and walks towards the garden entrance.”

Danny huffs angrily, but follows in his steps.

They walk around in the garden maze, seemingly for no reason. Turning and changing at different intervals. Danny is amazed at the sheer size of the garden, he thought the house looked impressive; the back of it is amazing. The topiary and exotic flowers make the place look so foreign to Danny, like he’s actually in a tropical jungle. There’s even a coconut tree. Danny isn’t even sure how it can grow here.

“Nature is wonderful isn’t it,” Kamekona says, smelling the air around him. “This place is my little Hawaii. I miss it a lot.”

“So why’d you move to New York.”

“To tell you the truth, I only came here for vacation,” Kamekona says with a slight laugh. “But then I realized that many aunties and uncles seem to have none of Kamekona’s guidance. Don’t understand what it mean to take care of children, to love’n’nurture them. Always on their Smarty phones, or up late doing whatever they do, handing their kids off to Nanny’s; like they don’t matter. I felt like it was my duty to help them realize this, and make them see through Haumea’s eyes. To connect with their children like Haumea connects all of us.

“Of course after a few weeks I decided to make my stay permanent, people in Hawaii are good without me. I’m better here.”

Danny smiles, because hell this guy stays for helping children and Danny has never been more grateful of their help, he may bitch about it, but the ‘thankyou’ is still there.

“So how are we going to do this whole ritual thing?” Danny is calm, the walk finally doing what Kamekona had intended.

“We go to water,” Kamekona says simply.

“Of course you have another fountain.” Danny says as he and Kamekona walk towards a giant fountain. “What am I supposed to do? Stick my head in it?

"No."

"Drink it?” Danny asks a little fearful.

“No, you just put a seashell in it.” Kamekona says with his head leaning backwards, looking at Danny like he's a complete idiot.

“That’s it?” Danny asks disbelievingly, biting back a bunch of snarky words. He'd been expecting a little more flare since they had to literally take him away via kidnapping. If that's all they had wanted to do with him, Danny felt furious at not just being told to just come here simply by being asked to do so.

“What? You want to stick your head in it?” Kamekona asks in an even more confused. “I don’t get you, brah.”

“No. I wanna get this over with,” Danny responds politely as he can in his situation of being nearly given an anxiety attack.

So he takes one of the seashells, that seem to have littered all over the fountain, and throws it in the fountain. It makes small little waves that disturb the soft reflection of the moon. Danny doesn’t feel any different, but something definitely happened. Something very important as he watches the faded image of a white seashell fall into the water.

“Haumea has decided your fate.” Kamekona voice bellows through the quiet night.

 

-——————————---------------------------------------------------------

 

“Holy shit.” Rachel gawks at Kono in disbelief, at the wild story that Kono just retold in very much exaggerated manner, that Danny did not appreciate at all. “What I wouldn’t give to see your face when they kidnapped you,” Rachel says to Danny as they start a slow walking pace, soon building up to a slight jog. “It’s almost as funny as you having couvade syndrome.”

“It’s not funny, Rach.”

“He was like a scared little chicken.” Kono emphasizes this point by folding her arms in her armpits and flapping them. 

“I’m sorry but thinking that you’re going to be potentially murdered makes one scared out of their minds like a chicken!”

“Poor Daniel,” Rachel says cutely, pinching Danny’s cheek while they pick up speed to jog around the field.

“I’m never forgiving you for that Kalakaua. You’re on dish duty the whole month.”

“Awwwww,” Kono whines. “It was totally worth it though,” she says as she picks up her pace and passes Danny by a good foot. Danny maybe short, but he makes up for it for his quick strides, and then he’s quickly matching Kono’s speed.

“Tell me why we’re jogging again?”

“Because it’s healthy,” Rachel says simply. “I need to keep daily exercise. Just because I'm 3 weeks pregnant doesn't mean I have to stop. Besides if I don’t run, I’m going to be jumping Stan this entire week.”

“I don’t need to hear that. I don’t, okay.”

"Same here," Kono concurs.

“You have no bloody idea how much pregnancy messes with your sex hormones.” Rachel says with a shake of her head, but then her grin turns mischievous. “Oh wait, you do!”

Danny groans. “I hate you so much.”

“This is too funny, brah. You’re going to be just going to be acting like Rachel for a bit. I heard from Chin that it'll only last for a while. Worst case scenario you'd probably have it till the end of her pregnancy.”

“Great, just great,” Danny says with spite. “Now I have to wait some more weeks before I can be normal again.”

"You make it sound like pregnancy is awful," Kono says, giggling.

"It is," Rachel and Danny say at the same time.

"You know the science of couvade syndrome is very limited. But some doctors just call it pregnancy envy. So, Danny, you're just jealous you can't get pregnant at all."

"You're the one who asked to be my carrier," Danny chides back.

"I'm not the one who's envious of my baby making abilities."

"I am not. I have total respect for women. You can make a baby, you get pregnant, and you-"

"-you, Daniel, have underlying jealousy for not being able to have babies with Steve."

"What. No. That is not at all what this means. Stop psychoanalyzing this syndrome anymore than it needs to be."

Rachel just puts her arm around Danny, it’s a little awkward since their jogging and whispers into Danny's ears that he shouldn't feel ashamed for his feelings. "Until then, you enjoy your time with Steve. I bet you and him would go-”

“Aaannd that’s the end of this jog. I don’t want to hear anymore of this bull crap.”

“I’m with you. Spar in the gym instead?” Kono asks.

“No way Kalakaua, you fight dirty.”

Kono just smirks at Danny. “Scared haole?”

“Stop calling me that, were not in Hawaii, and no I am not scared.”

“Then fight.” She states simply.

“Okay girlie wants to fight, she gets a fight.”

When they finished their small jog they walked back into the gym and headed towards the padded room that they used for boxing or hand-to-hand combat.

Kono put on a pair of pink hand gloves, cracking her knuckles like she was ready to take down a flock of angry ninjas. Danny had gotten his own gloves on and was stretching his leg a bit, and giving his knee a rub. Both of them also put on a pair of white head gears and knee pads. It became a habit to fully armour themselves because Kono really did play dirty enough to leave bruises.

Rachel was just sitting down on a mat pulling some small weights. The doctor had noted that she didn't need to quit her daily exercise routine, but that she did need to not strain herself too much.

She slapped her padded hands together, and gave a curt bow before she launched her first barrages of punches and kicks at Danny.

Danny kept his ground, and deflected each punch and kick. Years of training to be a cop still haven’t made him complacent. It’s become a sort of tradition ever since Kono challenged Danny’s take down technique last year when the entire restaurant staff had to partake in a self defense class. Danny and Kono seem to have these fights at least once a week or on weekdays when there both free.

He’s easily standing toe to toe with the Hawaiian.

“So,” Rachel says casually as if Danny and Kono aren’t having heavy duty combat with each other.

“What?” Danny says after he dodges one of Kono's punches.

“Well I was just thinking, what you’re going to name the kid?”

“Kate for a girl, Jake for a guy,” Danny breathes out the names, trying to stay focused and not get hit.

“Daniel, that isn’t very special.”

“Sounds kind of boring to me,” Kono adds in. She gives another round house kick Danny’s side, he blocks it with his hands. “Need the name to be more intriguing,” she adds while using her other leg to knee Danny in the stomach.

“Well then what names aren’t boring?” he chokes out when he pushes back enough not to get kneed.

“Something like Scarletta or Jancell.”

“Jani-What? I am not naming my kid that!”

“Bu-”

“No. Now change the subject to something that won't make me pop a vein in my head.” He throws another punch at Kono, she dodges, but he lands a quick another one to her other side, where she can't defend as fast. Kono brushes off the punch.

“Fine. How was the second date with Steve?”

“New subject,” Danny asks again just as he gets gutted with a thrust to his side.

“No. I’m serious, you never really did talk to me about you're secret date.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“Bullocks! Now spit and tell, Daniel.”

“That sounds gross,” Danny says, sparing time.

“Tell,” Rachel said impatiently.

“It was nice, okay.” Danny blocks a clock to the head with Kono’s elbow. Danny retaliates by knocking her over with his foot, who only just slightly loses balance. “We went to the beach, and had a nice meal.”

“The beach?” Rachel snaps her head back in surprise. “Wow, I didn’t think it was possible. It took me two weeks of wheedling to get you to go to my cousins wedding on the beach. And it only took him a few days to do that. I’m jealous.”

“Well he had to drag me into it, and I wasn’t really paying attention to where I was going.”

Rachel gives him a sly smile. “Too busy looking at his ass?” Danny doesn’t give a respond, but instead gives a small blush. He finally gets Kono leg again, and throws her down on her back.

“Kamekona told me that he saw you guys at his shave-ice stand," Kono states as she recovers from the impact.

“Yeah, we did go get dessert at his shave-ice parlor.” Danny smiles at the memory.

“He also told me that Steve's never been one to bring dates over there... told me you'd have to be pretty special to go there,” Kono says with a wicked small smile. Danny’s eyebrows raised, and felt his blush creep back full force, which is when Kono takes her chance. She rises back up, using the momentum to side sweep Danny off his feet. She straddles Danny's chest and taps him there three times.

“That’s Kono’s 3rd consecutive win,” Rachel announces.

“Fuck you.” Danny groans at his aching back. “You cheated.”

“You say whatever makes you happy, bruddah.”

“Because of that I’m not telling you what happened on the end of the date.”

“That’s not fair, Daniel.” She gives a pout.

"Awww come on. I beat you fair and square. Don't be such a downer, Danny."

“Nope my lips are sealed.” Danny says making ziplock motions with his mouth.

“Did you have sex with him?!” Rachel gawks out loud. “Oh my god, you did, that’s why you’re not telling us.”

“No! What do you take me for Rachel? Easy?”

“Generally you are, and nothings wrong with that. I just mean that it only takes a meal and you’re ready to cop a feel.”

Danny rolls his eyes. “I’m not telling. End of conversation. Now I’m going to go take a shower.”

“Come on, Danny, you can’t leave us in the cold like this.”

Danny tries his hardest not to glare at her. He’s learned that if he does, it’ll only rile Rachel and Kono even more. So Danny sticks with the ‘not caring’ tactic.

Danny had learned about Rachel’s many strange habits, but the strangest of them being that she has to has to know every detail of everyone’s relationship, a habit that’s grown due to Danny’s multiple boyfriends, and has incidentally has spread to Kono as well. It's a strange protective streak, Danny knows, but it can get very invasive for Danny's and his partners. “Maybe later, not in the mood,” Danny says with a smirk. It may be a weak way of getting payback on Rachel, but it’s the only ammunition Danny has to use and he want's to abuse it.

He takes his towel and walks to the shower room. He still here’s Rachel’s whining even when he makes it to the door. He has a feeling Rachel will follow him, though Rachel’s not that desperate, he thinks. Danny sets his gym bag down and opens up his locker to put his clothes away.

“Hey, Danny.”

Danny turns around. “Rachel, why ar- Steve?”

“Yeah, me. Why’d you call me Rachel? Is she here too?”

“You don’t really want to know, babe," Danny coolly replies.

Steve gives him a quick glance. “Huh. Okay.”

“Why are you here, again?”

“This is a public gym, Danno. I don’t think it just privy to you like the cab was.”

“Right never mind. Are we always going to run up to each other like this?”

“Who knows?” Steve says with a care free shrug. “This could be some sort of sign Danny.” Steve says while pointing between him and Danny.

“Yeah," Danny nods, "that the universe is saying you’re an immense stalker.”

“I told you this place is a public gym. It means that anyone can come in here.” Steve says lifting up his own gym bag. “And by the way, your footing sucks.”

“Excuse me? Why are you always patronizing everything I do? Who gives you that right?"

"Because your footing really did suck. Use the heel of your foot next time to stand your ground, so that you don't fall over."

"Ha! You just admitted that you were spying on me, rather closely to actually notice that, too. ”

"I'm an observer."

"You're a stalker is what you are, Steve, you know you-"

He’s stopped by lips on his mouth. “Calm down, Danny.” Steve says tentatively right next to Danny’s temple.

Danny nibs slowly on Steve’s lower lip, feeling Steve's wet hair. Steve starts to push Danny to the locker doors.

“We’re not doing this in the locker room,” he says sibilantly. During 6:00 the gym is usually deserted, but it still doesn’t break the line of giving oral sex or sex in the general public.  
“I don’t think I’d go that far, and besides no one is here, Danny,” Steve says voice a slightly hoarse. To prove his point he gives Danny another long, demanding kiss.

They kiss a little more for a few minutes, Danny trying to ease his want from Steve. It really bothers Danny how he's really starting to not give a shit and just have his way with Steve in the locker rooms. 

Which is why he is really glad Steve stops kissing him and looks at him with a knowing smirk. “You're choosing the date this time?" Steve says instead of taunting Danny's urges.

He's so fucking glad for that. 

  
Danny is still a little dazed, but he nods. “Yeah. How's dinner at my place, you neanderthal animal?"

Steve hefts his bag over his shoulder, and gives a pantomime of an actual neanderthal. "Yes, Steve would like very much, Dan-dan.” Its gets a laugh out of Danny.

“Well I’m just gonna go head for a shower. I’ll see you tonight, babe."

“Okay.”

"Yeah, bye," Danny mumbles with another blushing smile.

With that said Steve walks out of the change room. He gives Danny one more fond look before heading out the door. The look is so fucking genuine and intimate that it makes Danny think that it really could work. But it's just a façade, and it won't last as long. It'll never work because Danny's made a commitment, and he can't ask in any reasonable manner for Steve to make that same decision. But he will try. He's going to go through with it, to date Steve, and try. Trying to take a chance is all that he can do.

And if Danny has to make a decision, he's always going to choose his kid over Steve any day. He will. He won't ever give up on them.

Danny's going to be a parent, and Steve can go on to the next guy or girl in his life.

That's all that Danny can do.


	8. Chili Is An Aphrodisiac

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapt. I kind of cut off the rest of the chapter for a later one. 
> 
> :S I DONT KNOW HOW TO WRITE SMUT  
> OMG I'M TOO AWKWARD FOR THAT. 
> 
> maybe...

To say that Danny was absolutely late with going to the dealer to buy a new lease for a car, was quite an understatement.

It really was something he should have done a long time ago.

Danny could blame Steve for not buying it. He seems to act as a huge distraction for Danny since he's always pestering and bothering him by his kisses and him simply being there. It's not something Danny likes very much, but he can deal with these obstructions if they're only for a little while. He's not distracted at the moment by Steve's being and therefore its the most appropriate time to go and buy himself a car. Danny thought that it'd be much easier to get a car he wants without Steve than with the menace tagging along, giving his unsolicited opinion on cars and certain models.

So Danny just gets a cab ride and heads to a car dealership and instantly buys one. It almost seems like another temptation buy of his. It shouldn't be, really, he's got the money, and he should spend it for himself a bit. He's got to treat himself once in a while or otherwise he'll just become one of those hermits that never spends anything, and saves it all until he's 70 or senile.

And Danny just needs a car to move around New York, and not have to deal with hailing stupid taxi's all the time.

He burns rubber right out of the car dealership building, feeling all the sorts excited with the Camaro's driving wheel in his hands.

It's by no surprise to him or anyone else that Danny ends up taking a test drive across the town with the implicit, innocent thought of going 100 or more down a clear path.

Danny really doesn't know why he's wants to do something so reckless but he's got an itch and it's got to get scratched, and maybe the couvade syndrome is really making him crave affection with Steve again, or maybe making him act erratic. It's strange how it acts. Like one second he could decide to eat a pack of donuts and the next he'll push Steve against a wall and kiss him with virility. It's strange and Danny really doesn't know how to control it.

Danny fears it.

“Take a turn in the next 20 miles ahead,” the GPS droned out, breaking the quiet contemplation. Danny quirked his eyebrows a bit, not realizing he'd put Steve's address in the GPS settings.

Danny really fears what he's going to do.

“That is great,” Danny said with a small drone of his own as he followed the instructions towards Steve's place.

When he saw a house a few miles ahead, Danny pushed the meter a little bit. He checked his monitor and his GPS pinged that ‘he was 5 miles away from his destination.’ Once he was in the long drive way to Casa McGarrett, he spotted Steve.

And boy did Danny regret that.

Holy. Shit.

Danny's mind went blank and then, like a tsunami, flooded his mind as he tried to process the image before him.

Steve. On the lawn. Mowing naked. Shirtless and showing off his pecs in full glory. Like really what the hell kind of guy takes his shirt off to mow the lawn? Danny’s thoughts protested, but his pants were making a different kind of protest. Jeeze, Danny needs to make way to stop with the bad puns.

It really should not be sexy to push a lawn mower. No. That should not be allowed. But Steve, with all the unfairness in the world, seems to pull it off pretty damn well. He looks like he could pass for as an add model for John Deere products.

His chest hair and neck are damp with sweat, jeans low riding on his hips, revealing a silver of his happy trail. His hair so disheveled it looks like he just had wild sex in the barn - Danny immediately stopped that train of thought. Jesus Danny was getting a serious problem in his pants. He shifted from his seat. His pants were becoming too constricting for his liking.

His head suddenly hit the back of the chair, the wind knocked out of him, slightly.

Danny’s car had collided with a tree when he'd been too busy looking at Steve.

”Shit! Shit!” Danny said smacking the steering wheel with his hands. “Shit! I get you day and you’re already like this!” Danny says waving his hands, because he can’t really form words to describe the stupidity of the situation. “How the hell does McGarrett do that?” Danny accuses unfairly. At least the Camaro didn’t release its airbag. So that means it wasn’t that damaged.

Not that damaged.

“Danny, Danny! You okay? Steve questioned Danny in rapid speech. Taking the two seconds that the collision happened to come racing from where he was on the lawn.

“Yes-Yes, I’m okay. But my car is ruined, because of you.”

“Because of me?” Steve's head snaps back, his eyebrows raised in surprise.

“Yes, because of you and your… nakedness,” Danny tells him as he gestured towards Steve’s naked chest. “What kind of person does that sort of thing? You could kill people by mowing naked like that, Steven!”

“I didn’t mean to kill you with my body. I’ll button up my shirt next time,” Steve drawls sarcastically. “And I thought our date was supposed to be at 1600,” Steve says looking down at his watch. “Your 3 hours early for our date. I needed more time to prepare.”

“I wanted to be early. Is that a bad thing to do?” Danny admits smoothly. He puts his car in reverse and pulls his car out of the tree, and into some semblance into Steve's driveway with a busted head light and warped hood.

“No. Not really,” Steve replies almost as an afterthought.

“Hey, Steve, help me get out. I think the doors are a bit jammed.” Danny asked when the doors wouldn’t open for him. Danny tries to tug it a bit, pushing the door as hard as he could to open. I guess it got stuck from the collision.

"Yeah, um, I'd help you and all... except I kind of ripped the door handle from your side."

Danny just nods to that fact, not at all trying to yell at Steve or implode with anger at his new car being destroyed in a few minutes since he bought it. "Of course you did. You're a hulking mass of muscle that cant control his own strength," Danny says as calmly as possible.

"I'm sorry. I was just worried and didn't think that would happen."

"No, no, its fine. I'll go through the other door."

Once Danny escapes he see's Steve still holding the silver Camaro door handle and tries to hide it from Danny by placing it behind him and dropping it. Danny just rolls his eyes and mumbles 'my damn car' to him.

“Oh, ugh, sorry,” Steve says, dropping the silver car handle on the ground, looking sheepish. “You should just come in."

After the whole situation with the collision was over, and Danny was done looking at the door handle for his Camaro, then looking at Steve, then glaring at the man and screaming why Steve was a walking disaster.

Steve finally herded him to the house.

The front door was a simple white wooden doorframe, that for some reason had a pass lock on it.

When Steve punched in the code, he led Danny into the living room with a hand on his back.

The interior of it was simple and elegant, yet held a sense of playfulness; even though it looked like it hadn’t had kids lived in for very long. Danny’s mind went through a bunch scenes were he thought of kids laughter filling the place, toys left on the floor, and how that little far corner would make a nice place for a playroom—when he stomped a non-existent foot on that idea.

“I’m just going to check on a few things in the barn, okay? You okay with waiting for a while?” Steve says coming through the door, as he puts on a shirt, which Danny is utterly grateful for. “I’ll be back soon.” Steve says going into Danny’s space and kissing him. “And I’m really sorry about the car."

Danny just shakes his head in apology. “It’s okay, I’ll be staying here for a couple of days anyways. I can get a friend to fix it for free, when I bring it to him.”

"I could call the local mechanic if you want. See if you have a concussion or something. You don't really, I know, but, just in case.”

"I'm fine overall. I don't feel dizzy or nauseous at all."

“That’s good,” Steve says kissing Danny again. “Okay, okay” Steve says pushing Danny back with his hands. “Now I really need to check on that barn, but we can resume this at a later time.”

“Yeah, yeah go ahead,” Danny says patting Steve on the back as he leaves.

Steve reluctantly gets out of the door, with only a few more kisses to spare. It’s funny how foreign he feels. He’s never been this affectionate with anyone, but he doesn’t find it all that terrible or disgustingly sweet. Its kind of nice.

Danny feels a bit awkward standing alone in the house. He gives up with sitting down and opts to look around the house since all he's done in the past 20 minutes is stare at nothing, waiting for Steve to be done.

There's a spartan feeling to the way Steve decorates the house. Spartan in the way that all the furniture and decorum seems not at all like the way Steve would leave it, nothing seems like it belongs to Steve or shows that Steve even lives here that much. It just all seems to be there for show, like in ads, not to be used in a functional sense. It's sort of like nothings been changed since the past 10 years and has been left to stagnate in its sameness, but still left perfectly pristine and clean.

He wasn't expecting for such a spry guy like Steve to live in a house like this.

Trophies are also lined along the huge mantle of the fire place. Each one of them probably belonging to Steve and his sisters achievements in their high school years. When Danny takes a turn towards the hallway he looks closer among the walls of the place, where he can see pictures of a younger Steve growing up. He see's Steve happy, holding a bundle in his arms that he believes is his baby sister, and a couple behind them that Danny concludes are his parents. There are more pictures of Steve with other people, ones including with Chin and other Hawaiian natives as well.

Danny wanders further into the hallway, until he see's a door. He opens it and enters, notices it's a small dining room area where its adorned with a candle display and white ivory sheets on top of a pine wood table. The door closes behind him in a swinging motion, like a typical kitchen impact door. Once inside he's hit with the smell of something good in the kitchen. Danny has been a chef for most parts of his life, and because of that he developed a habit of sniffing food and trying to name all the ingredients from one waft of his hands.

He looks around to find the source of the smell, and notices a large brown stove, where pot rests boiling. He also' sees a large ladle on a rest, that still has chili sauce on it, and with buns and hot-dogs on the side too. Danny can’t help himself smile like a goof that Steve would make chili-dogs for him.

Danny wafted in the scents “What the hell did he do to this?” Danny says, edging closer towards the pot. His mouth is basically watering as he nears the boiling pot. He wafts in the smells of onions, spices, sugar, peppers, and all the other normal stuff, but there’s just one ingredient in it he can’t place his finger on.

Danny isn’t proud of what he does next; he’s a chef and should always use proper standards of eating food. But it feels like he hasn’t eaten in the past 24 hours. Maybe its because the work load really has increased, and Rachel’s pregnancy has really made him worry that his stress has really sky rocketed to a new high. Or maybe Danny’s having a hormonal induced craving for food, and he wants to know what the hell Steve put in it that making him do such a sacrilegious act of eating straight out of the pot.

Grabbing the buns, and the hot-dogs he dips them in the sauce. He’s hoovering the sauce down, and eating like crazy. He’s on his fourth serving when he's suddenly doesn't even care about what Steve put in it because he's just scarfing it down like a maniac craving his favourite food like he'll never have a chance to eat it again.

“Do you need a plate with that?” A voice says behind him.

“No,” Danny says with a mouthful of chili sauce, turning towards Steve, red blush colouring his cheeks.

“Come on. Let’s eat like normal civilized people.” Steve says with a knowing smirk as he closes in on Danny.

“Screw you,” he spits out. Danny swallows his meal down, he goes to the sink and washes his hands. He sees Steve takes a plate for himself and seats himself on the table, alone.

“What no chair for me?”

“Seeing as you ate half the food I prepared. It’ll just be me eating, and you watching me eat for now."

“Hey it wasn’t my fault, the smell was... overpowering.”

A pleased smile greeted Steve’s face. “Well I’m glad you think my cooking was that good you nearly ate it all.”

“The sauce was a bit tangy. Not enough salt too,” Danny says quickly, not letting McGarrett win him so easily.

“Really? Was that why you hoovered down half of it?”

“Shut up.” Danny covers his smile with a hand, and then taking it off immediately, surprised. It’s right then that Danny realizes that he still has sauce on his mouth.

“You have something on your face you know?”

"Thanks for the preemptive warning."

"You're welcome," Steve says while biting off a piece of his hot dog.

“Are you gonna lick it off?” Danny asks as he leans on the water basin, a sarcastic smile plastered on his face.

“If you ask like that, no," Steve retorts.

"You promised we'd continue with that kiss."

"Let me eat first. Jeeze, does eating turn you or something?"

“Some foods act like an aphrodisiac,” Danny tells Steve as he walks towards him, bending down Steve's face, hovering over him as he strokes his chin gently. "So yeah, maybe food makes me horny."

Steve gives him a put upon sigh, but he's smiling all the same. “Jesus, Danny."

“Get over here."

And they kiss. It's a lot longer, more intense then the last time. It's fulfilling is what it is. As Danny really gets into it, letting Steve attack his mouth and swiping off the remaining sauce on his stubble with his tongue.

Steve, not satisfied, brings Danny down with his tie and they kiss again.

“It really was good though,” Danny says moving away, and taking a bite of bread from his plate. Danny goes to take a chair out of the table and brings it closer to Steve's chair. They sit side by side and eat their shared meal.

An idiotic smile graces Steve's face when Danny looks at him again. “I know. I can taste it all over your mouth. You really ate of it.”

“It’s cause you restless with your tongue. I bet you it’s your kink, you like tasting what I taste. ”

Steve gives him a blush, added with a satisfying smirk. “Come on. When I’m done eating, I want to show you something in the barn."

“Is this supposed to be another secret dating spot, McGarrett?” Danny asks jokingly.

“Its not anything dangerous, Danny,” Steve says stopping Danny from speaking any further. “It's not dangerous or a datespot really. I just want to show you something."

When Steve was done with his meal they both cleaned the dishes and the dining room. After that he gave Danny a quick tour of inside the house, they circled around it, showing Danny the many stories and favorite places he could tell from living on the farm when visiting his grandma.

“You used to play on that thing?” Danny says, finger pointing to an old, rusty tire swing.

"Yeah. I used to push Mary on that swing when we came here for vacation. Mary's my sister," Steve says answering Danny's preformed question. “Wanna go on it?” Steve suggests with his eyebrows when Danny eyes the tire swing by the Oak Tree.

Danny's, for some reason, is suddenly picturing a kid with blond hair and blue eyes being pushed by a man that looks kind of like Steve. "If that was a subtle way of saying I'm tiny, screw you." Danny says when he finally rubs imaginary thoughts away.

“Come on, it was fun when I used to play on this thing as a kid. It barely gets used now.”

“I’m not a kid Steve. We're not kids. Why don’t you get your own kids, so you can push them on the stupid tire swing.” Danny’s comment was supposed to be acknowledged as a joke, but Steve stopped pushing him towards the tire swing entirely.

“I don’t think I’d want kids.”

Danny’s heart sinks, not at all expecting Steve to say something so honest about his life.

“Fine, push me on the stupid thing,” Danny says walking to the tire swing. It doesn’t matter if he wants kids, he’s not that kind of guy. Probably doesn’t want a kid right now either, Danny repeats the words in his heads.

“Well, I do want kids, but my job kind of makes it difficult for that, Steve whispers, grabbing Danny by the waist, so that he doesn’t rush out.

“You sell cheese, McGarrett,” Danny says quickly. His heart still fluttering with a dangerous optimism at what Steve just said. “What kind of job like cheese selling makes it difficult to have kids?” Danny questioned as innocently as possible.

“Do you want to see them?” Steve suggests suddenly. Danny can detect when someone deflecting, he’s a master of it in the first place, but somehow they both silently agree that its better they forget this ever happened. Its not what he wants, but it doesn’t matter.

Danny agrees and Steve takes his hand.

He leads Danny to a giant barn a few meters away from the house. Steve removes the latch on the large wooden doors. Light spills out from the doors into the dark setting scenery, the sun for some reason has settled to early.

What Danny sees when he enters the room is row after row of cheeses. Each one given a name plate, and date. There is one of Chevre, Roquefort, Stilton, Feta, Emmantler and a whole lot Danny doesn’t even know about.

“Well, this is quite a collection of cheeses.” Danny could make so many recipes from all these cheeses at hand he might not even know where to start. “And you made all of these by hand?”

“Yeah," Steve nods. "We like to do old style cheese making, it makes the cheese taste better, or that’s what my grandmother would use to say."

Steve leads them down a long corridor of cheeses. Steve tells him a ton of facts about artisanal style cheese making.

Danny pays close attention to what Steve says, until one of the cheeses catches his eye. The cheese is a cheddar yellowish, with slight brown on the ends, and has a name plate that says ‘Danny.’

“You named a cheese after me?” Danny blurts out when he gets closer to the cheese frame.

“Oh,” Steve says stopping his speech about the health benefits of Cheese. “You saw that, umm. Yeah… is that weird? Because I can change it if you want.”

Steve gives him a kicked puppy look. “God you are making this so hard.”

Steve’s eyebrows quirked. “About what?”

“I mean.” Danny paused, trying to get the words he needed out. “It’s nice you named a cheese after me.” Danny could tell Steve later. “It’s really sweet. And you’re making it really hard not to jump you right here right now.” Danny adds, his mouth going clamping shut in panic. Fuck. That was worse than telling him that he’s having a kid.

He glanced a little at Steve, afraid. He didn’t really mean to say that, tell him that they should forget this ever happened, like last time. Let it be in the past.

But Steve was ever looming over Danny, eyes a slight bit darker. His head tilted to the side in a cocky sort of way. He grabbed Danny by the hips, and hey, look at that, Steve was really glad to hear that answer. Lips met with his, and Danny was being pushed back into a shelf of cheeses.

Who the hell taught Steve how to kiss? No man should kiss this aggressively and still be so gentle.

He groped Danny’s leg, still kissing him and gently placing him on a wooden cargo box.

“Is it sanitary to have sex in here?” Danny has to ask, as he knocks over a small shelf of what he thinks is roquefort.

All Danny gets is Steve groping his ass even futher, and rubbing his hips in gentle thrusts down his thighs.

Danny takes that as an okay. He opens up Steve’s buttoned up shirt and spreads his hand all over the skin.

Steve is draped all over him, looking so debauched. Its stirring intense want inside Danny. Feeling every inch of Danny’s body like he can’t get enough as he ruts.

Danny is moaning obscenities like a mantra, as Steve buries himself in Danny’s bare throat. Every feeling, every touch seems to be multiplied by 10-fold. His skin so sensitive it’s making him dizzy every time he caresses Steve with his palms, just to touch all that expanse of tanned skin, all for Danny’s play. God he isn’t going to last. He shamelessly tries to pull off the buckle of Steve’s pants, failing like he's some clumsy virgin.

It gets Steve to pull him even closer, sucking on the bruise Danny knows is already blooming on his neck. Danny barely gets the buckle off before he cries out in blissful pain. A wet spot start to bloom in his pants and Danny's eyes go wide. “Oh, fuck, did I just?” Danny thinks loudly. He has the pure decency to hide in Steve's chest and think about how he just shot his load like some fucking teenager on his first try.

Steve still moaning and pushing Danny. He doesnt seem to notice at all, too distracted by making Dannys neck a throbbing red bruise. Steve obviously loved that sound he just made, Danny thinks absently. He gropes for Danny’s dick, pulls back to look at Danny when his hands are stained wet with his cum. “Did you just-?” Steve moves back a bit, stunned at Danny, but his face still glazed with lust.

Danny shakes his head a little; he’s a bit too dazed to speak properly. Why did Steve move away from him? Steve needs to be closer, a lot closer. His dick is getting hard already from just Steve looking at him again. He's never had a refractory period that fast in his life, not even as a teenager.

“We’re not done yet, Steven." Danny says, already taking the situation away from the awkwardness. "I haven’t gotten you off yet. And there is so fucking going to be a round two,” Danny says, grabbing Steve by the collar and draping Steve all over him as he leans back.

Steve goes willingly without protest.


	9. A Months Much Too Long

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry that I just split this chapter in half and shit. I didn't feel like they worked well together. 
> 
> and for those of you hoping I was going to write smut in this chapter are going to be very very disappointed. 
> 
> I can't write smut very well- or I just don't think I'd be good at it. 
> 
> But at least I'm not that asshole that actually puts foreplay to sex as a cliff hanger to another chapter - since there was no graphic sex in this chapter at all

Danny woke up to something soft and warm, yet it had tiny little pricks of curly… hair? What the hell was he sleeping on? It was still too early. Danny was too tired to care about where exactly he was sleeping on, but the thing just felt so damn comfortable to sleep on. He breathed in the scent of whatever it was, and for reasons unknown to Danny’s person, he licks it. It held a salty taste with a hint of coconut to it. The taste was addictive. Danny started to lave it with his tongue, to get more and more of the taste. He wasn’t sure if he should be doing this, clearly, though, he was loving every second of it. His brain slowly resurfacing to consciousness as he lazily woke from his haze.

“Danny, that’s going to be round 5 for sure,” a voice groaned under him. Hips rocking Danny’s thigh slowly. Danny’s head sprung up.

“Steve?” His senses finally waking up, bringing him back to what transpired between them.

“Danny I didn’t say to stop,” Steve whined as he grabbed at Danny's neck, smoothing the hair softly and guiding him downwards, trying to goad him into more foreplay.

“Oh god, shit, what am I doing?” Danny gets out of Steve’s space, and stands next to him instead. “Oh fuck,” Danny says when he notices that there both naked on a carpet, in a fucking barn. It feel's like Danny’s in some cheap porno with Steve and he hates that.

“Babe, what’s wrong?” Steve sounds concerned, finally waking up from his own sex addled brain.

Danny swallowed nervously as he looked at Steve, his thoughts unbidden to speak. “Steve I need to tell you something.” Its better to get this over with anyways, Danny thinks with trepidation at what he's going to tell Steve. Danny can’t lie about this any longer. They just had sex and this is getting way too personal now. Sex was never this personal with anyone of his partners. It feels wrong to be doing this, feels wrong to enjoy something that he's never going to have again. It just doesn't settle well with Danny. He enjoyed it for sure, but that died down ever since he realized that real emotions came into play when he was having sex with Steve. It felt so good, but it felt like he was also using Steve.

“Are you going to have a gay-freak now?” Steve’s stance goes rigid.

“What! No!”Danny says turning his head to Steve. The answer relieves the tense off of Steve’s shoulder, but only slightly. “That’s not what I’m freaking about.”

“Then what is it?” Steve’s stance suddenly going rigid again, like he can't decide on what position to take. Danny sighs. He needs to get it or it’s not going to get any easier if he does. Danny also has sense of pride, he needs to tell Steve or else he’ll end up knee-deep in this thing, and hurting him even more. It's not about his feelings anymore. Steve's important to Danny that he just can't do this anymore.

“Steve, I'm gonna be honest... I’m having a kid with- Rachel, she’s, ugh pregnant with my kid. She- I just got the results a few weeks ago.” Danny stutters to get all the words out.

“What?" Steve asks confused, his eyes crinkling into an unpleasant look. "Seriously, what the hell are you talking about?”

“I’m having a kid; I'm going to be a dad.” Danny states it simply. It’s better to just get it out, and not sugar-coat it.

“Is this supposed to be some kind of joke?” Steve asks, taken aback and shaking his head slightly with Danny's confession.

“No. No its not,” Danny says trying to make his tone very serious. Steve gave Danny a wide stare, his eyes something tinged with hurt.

“When the hell did this happen?” Steve says with a terse tone.

“It-it was kind- it was on the day we met, 3 months I think. I didn’t mean to tell you because I didn’t think we would turn out so good. I didn't expect to feel things for you so suddenly.”

Steve just gives him a blank stare, like nothing Danny's said affected him.

“So you and Rachel were together, and she was pregnant the whole time we dated.”

“You make me sound like I’m a cheater. But I’m not. She’s just pregnant with my child, but not in the way you think.”

“I think it’s pretty explanatory.” Steve says as he gets up from the carpet and puts on his shirt and pants on. Danny panics with his hands, his hands grabbing Steve by the arms.

“No! Me and Rachel never had sex, okay. I’m not that type of person, Steve. She’s was just-she was just the carrier. Me and her were never together in that way.”

"So you just decided to get a baby with her, okay."

"Yeah and so what? What do you have to say about that?" Danny questions him, puffing up and getting defensive. He brings his hands up to stand, and looks defiantly at Steve. They both just stare at each other, neither of them wanting to say anything, but both itching to fight or yell.

"Say something, Steve," Danny says when it's quiet for too long. It's killing him with the silence. Steve just shakes his head, his hands pushing Danny's hands away when he unconsciously reaches for him.

“What do you want me to say, Danny? Am I supposed to give you guys a fucking congratulations?” Steve says the words heatedly. “Because I’m glad you’re having a baby with Rachel, so fucking happy.”

Danny flinches at the remark. “It was before I met you, Steve. I didn’t know this would happen, but I won’t let you justify my choices.” He made them and he’s not regretting them. “I wanted a baby, and I couldn’t wait for someone like you to walk in and make me feel this way,” Danny clenches his hands, god he’s screwing this up for a bigger mess to come. “I thought if I waited any longer I’d have missed my chance to be a parent, to be a father-to just have a family.”

“I’m happy for you Danny, I really am.” Steve says without any enthusiasm at all, his voice was totally drained of emotion.

“I’m leaving.”

"Steve, Steve!" Danny yells for him, still trying to reach for him as he walks the room nearly stark naked for him with just his boxers on, that he hastily put on as he walked through the dingy barn barefoot.

Steve turns around suddenly, his face filled with anger and turmoil. "Three months," he spits the words out to Danny. "Three months we've been dating and you've never told me this before. This isn't something you can hide from me."

"Steve we've barely gotten to know each other, that is not-"

"Don't lie to me Danny, don't tell me that I'm nothing to you. Because you're something I want so badly it hurts," Steve admits the last one with such force, spitting the words out like they might burn him. Danny just looks up, like he's biting down a sob.

"Steve," he says so quietly, so hopelessly that it tears Danny from the inside.

"You couldn't trust me," Steve says, nodding his head with tears in his eyes. "I'm in a committed relationship with you, and you can't simply trust me that I wouldn't run away." Danny's teeth clench at the accusations.

"A baby isn't a simple truth, Steve. It's not something I can admit to you so easily."

" _But you strung me along_ , _Danny._ I thought we we're going somewhere, like you wanted me as much as I wanted you."

"I just was telling you now, of all times. I know I couldn't keep it a secret."

"What the hell, Danny, we just had sex. You drop this shit on me right now."

"This child is not some shit, Steve. It's my kid."

"Right, you're with child. I forgot. Sorry about that since I was never informed about this until now, and I don't know how to react to it at all!"

He's never been so mad at a person, so irrationally frustrated that he can't even think clearly. 

"You were supposed to be just another asshole in my life that I fuck and forget," Danny snarls at him, and instantly regretting words he doesn't really mean. 

Steve's face recoils back, like he's been slapped. "You're right. You're absolutely right. I really am nothing to you. You need to get rid of me, I get it, fine," Steve stuttered to say.

Danny feels so ashamed at realizing he was playing with Steve. In a sense, just goading him along and to have some fun. "That's not what I actually wanted, Steve, not really. I didn't mean it that way."

Steve stops walking suddenly, facing Danny with sorrow, pitiful disposition in his eyes. "Where you just really going to leave me? Just throw me away, and use the baby as a perfect excuse to get rid of me."

"No, Steve, I would never do that. I just couldn't lie to you anymore." 

"It worked, Danny, you don't have to lie to me anymore. Have a happy life with Rachel and your kid." Danny gripped his own hands tightly, he felt frustrated at the whole situation, how bad the situation had gotten.

"You're such an asshole, Steve," he barked out, distressed and irked by this whole situation. Steve walks past Danny and heads for the barn doors. It slams hard when he closes it.

“So that’s it? You’re leaving? That's it?” Danny says to dead air, his voice cracking a bit. He knew it’d end this way, he just knew it. And even though Danny may have known that it would end like this, it still hurt. But knowing something is going to happen is nothing like the act itself actually happening. It’s much worse. Danny forgot how horrible it felt. Danny just falls down on the dirty floor, in his own damn underwear, and grabs his knees in a tight lock. It’s just this one moment that he’s actually allowing this, a moment where he can just be bitter about his life, about no matter how hard Danny tries to grab hold of his life, make if better, it all just breaks apart and crumbles.

Danny should have never taken the prize.

Now he’s suffering the consequences when life just reels it back in, and away from Danny.

——————————————--------------------------

“Come on baby, it was a dent, you can still do it.” Danny banged his hands on the dashboard, when the car didn’t rev. “Please just let this work,” Danny says taking the keys in his hand and turning them. The car engine dulled with life. “Thank you,” Danny said to whatever deity had brought his car back from the dead.

“What the hell are you doing?”

Danny didn’t turn to the voice, but he knew who it was, he didn't need confirmation.

“What does it look like I’m doing? I’m leaving, like you did,” Danny says snidely, but stops himself from going further, he doesn’t need to give Steve anymore shit. 

“I’m leaving, as in to go somewhere else besides this place, since I’m obviously not invited here anymore.”

“No, that’s not what I meant, Danny. I meant I needed to get out of there. I needed time for this-this thing that you told me about. 

Danny presses on the pedal, and the car starts up the dirt path. "Its not a thing, Steve. Its my kid," mimicking what he said last time. 

"We both said things we didn't mean." 

"Yeah. I get it. We both just fucked up this relationship by arguing." 

“So that’s it, you’ll just leave at 7:00 in the morning? You drop this pregnancy thing on me and you barely give me time process it?

“It’s not going to make a difference, Steve. We should just end things now,. You made it clear that you don’t want the things that I want.”

“Just-just give me some time, Danny. I'm just... confused by this.”

“And I told you it won’t make a difference.”

“How do you know that? You’re not omniscient. You can’t honestly tell me what I can or can’t do.”

“God are you damn stubborn bastard,” Danny finally turns to look at Steve, his eyes still rimmed red from their earlier fight. “You just don’t get it do you? You and me don’t mix well together! Hell I don’t mix well with anyone else, Steve.” Danny admits, turns away from Steve, tears obvious in his eyes. “Let’s just leave it at that, and move on with our lives."

"I know I said some shitty things, but I didn't mean any of them, I'm just... I really am confused with all this you brought on me." Danny just purses his lips, his face going stone-like and sad.

"What you said about me leading you on, it's sort of true, I guess. I just wanted to see how things went with you, so yeah, I did lead you on. But I only stopped really leading you on after I knew I cared for you, that this was going to be painful seeing you leave."

"I wasn't going to leave, not like that."

"Steve, I don't expect you to make a commitment on something you may never really want. It's selfish on my part."

 "Just give me time, please."

"I can't wait for you Steve. This is already too painful, leaving, lets just end it now." 

Danny gets no reply. McGarretts got nothing left to say, he doesn’t know if that's a bad thing or a good thing. He half expects Steve to come racing for the Camaro, when he drives on the dirt path, but he doesn’t. It's stupid for him to think for that.

Danny’s just alone for the remainder of his ride.

————------------------------------------------------------------------

He doesn’t see Steve for an entire week. Or the week after that. Not even next week either. Danny doesn't see him at his restaurant sitting down in one of the far corner tables in the back kitchen. He doesn’t see him at the subway station. Or even see him at the supermarket, selling his remarkable cheese. I guess this is his way of saying that their relationship is over. Danny had never really got an answer, he had an idea, but it wasn’t much. Now he knows for sure that this means it’s over. He lies on his bed again. He really needs to stop doing this. He needs to get his head out of the past, and just move on. He’s going to be a dad, and this is not going to be an obstacle for Danny, he'll get over it because Steve was really nothing. It's a lie. But its a lie that'll help him. He is going to push his heart aside for his child. He can’t be acting like this, he needs to move ahead.

“Danny open up the door!” comes the blaring wail of Rachel Edwards on his door, probably disrupting diners downstairs as well, with the way she's knocking and stomping all over the place.

“I’m not here!”

“Really? How childish. Just open the godamn door!”

“It’s not locked, Rach," Danny admits to his pillow, not wanting to raise his head, just wanting to suffocate himself being a failure at not getting over him.

“Oh,” he hears Rachel say from the door, stopping her rampaging. “Foolish of me not to check that, well I’m coming in, be decent at least,” she chirps sharply.

“All's good,” Danny says dryly. When he hears the door swing open, Rachel drops a ton of Babies-R-us bags.

“What the hell are those?” Danny says when he looks down at the bags she's dropped.

“I bought clothing for the baby, but this is just the first wave of clothes. I've bought more online.”

“And you didn’t call me to get my consent, or my help?”

“You kept ditching my calls," she says with a casual shrug. "And I felt that it was appropriate for you to have some recuperation time. And now that the week of moping is over you need to get up, get up. It’s over and forgotten.” She tries to pull Danny up with no avail.

“I’m tired, Rach,” Danny admits sullenly.

“Bullocks,” Rachel says, lifting Danny up slightly from his couch. “You were never this put out when you were tired, or when a break-up's happened.”

“He found out about the baby, of course I'm going to mope. So let me mope."

“You mean you never told him?”

“How the hell was I supposed to tell him, Rach? Casually just say ‘hey I’m having a kid. Want some coffee?.’"

"You could say it with less sarcasm," she says with an eye roll. "So he just left when you told him?”

“No, I did,” Danny admits with a pathetic snort. “I told him we should just end things. I’m no good with relationships anyways. It wouldn’t have worked.” Danny hates how he can say those words easily, and still sound strange to his own ears, even when he should know that it’s true. 

“Then he hasn’t given you a proper answer. Give him time to process this, Danny. I mean it is a lot to take in.”

“Funny, he said the same exact thing.” Danny says that with a cold smile and a longing in his gut for him, it's how he usual reacts when something reminds him of Steve. Danny shakes his head to clear his thoughts. "We both said some rude things about eachother. We just overreacted to the whole situation badly." 

"Well I can only assume you and him are worse at communicating than you are at making appropriate life choices."

"I'd like to remind you that you coerced me to make this choice." 

"And I'm just going to tell you that it was inevitable. We didn't even have to do it now, though."

Danny sighs, giving up on arguing with her. “Rach, it’s been weeks since I last heard or seen him. I think the answer is pretty obvious.”

“Give him one more week at least. Now come on, you need to hold my bags. We have a long list of stuff to check off.”

"I don't want to shop," he whines. "Come on. It's a better coping mechanism than drinking soy milk and watching reruns of Full House."

"I wasn't watching Full House," Danny retorts weakly. "I was watching True Detectives, for sure."

"Yeah, yeah, and I was wearing Walmart Clothes for fun. Now come on, you need to put on something less drab, and help me push 2 carts full of baby shit."

Danny whines even more.

———————————---------------------------------------

He gets nothing from Steve for another week, and Danny does gets over it quickly, still numbing the hurt from Steve's presence. It's really clear that Steve doesn't want to see him. So he really does attempt and numbing and hiding his feelings, trying to shut them off for good. But in the end something always ends up reminding him or Steve and he can't shut off the feelings fast enough before he's crying and screaming internally about a guy he's barely even known for a year.

He doesn’t care anymore, or at least that’s what he thinks. The only thing that’s keeping him from breaking apart, is that he starts to see Rachel’s belly bloating even more, defining her stomach and making it clear that she's very pregnant. It's the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. His child is growing in there. So Danny does what the responsible thing to do, and moves on, just like Steve did. Steve. He's gone for good. But Danny's damned if he's going to pine about a guy that doesn't even want him, he’s not letting this guy ruin his life, he can’t and he won’t. Danny's adamant on that notion.

He’s going to be a great dad, and raise his kid into a proper lady, or gentlemen, or whatever.

He's just going to be a dad.

Danny listens idly to the game playing on the T.V. He’s not really in it for the game now, only keeping touch for the score now and then.

When Danny finally feels the lull of going to sleep, he feels a shift in the air and a the faintest click of a window closing. Someone’s in his apartment. Danny has enough thought to get the bat he keeps under the bed, before he realises who it is.

“Whoa, stop it’s me Danny!”

“Steve!” Danny says, astonished.

“How the fuck did you get in here?” Steve grabs hold of the bat, before Danny can start beating him to a pulp, for the fact that he nearly gave him a heart attack.

“I’m sorry, I kind of picked your door open.”

“You couldn’t just knock like a normal person?”

“I don’t think you would have let me in,” Steve explains helplessly.

“You scared the shit out of me. I was about to whack you in the head with this thing,” Danny says pointing to the steel bat.

“You care about my safety, that’s cute, Danno. But I could have handled that bat just fine.”

“Wanna test that theory, babe? Cause I throw a mean swing." Danny gently swings the metal in his hand back in forth, like he's waiting to take a hit.

"That's cute of you, but you know I could easily overpower you." "

Why are you here?" he sighs as he drops the bat to the ground, not wanting to continue this playful argument any longer. He doesn't feel like fighting with him.

Steve gives a hard stare, like he's thinking of a strategy to answer him properly. His face suddenly goes determined and then hes taking quick strides to get personally in Danny’s face. Not at all wasting time. But Danny is over his sudden astonishment, and pushes Steve back. He doesn’t even care about the wounded look that graces Steve’s face. He could care less. But in reality, he does.

“You can’t just fucking waltz into my life like this, Steve.” Danny doesn't keep eye contact with Steve. If he does, he wont really know what he'll do.

“I screwed up okay, but I just, I just can’t let you go.” Danny just shakes his head a bit in frustration. Fuck him for just leaving you alone for a month. You don't have to go back to him. Danny's thoughts are bitter and harsh, but he tries to tone them down.

“Steve you should just leave,” he says as calmly as he can. "We can just end it on a clean note. Forget this happened and move on." 

“No,” Steve says adamantly.

“I care about you a lot, Danny. I can’t let you go. I don’t want to let you go.”

"It was real easy last time," Danny retorts the words as a insult.

"You don't know that, Danny. You don't know how much I’ve missed every fucking inch of you when you weren’t with me. You just scared me with the baby thing. Just trust me not to run, again." His words are all chopped, like Steve really can't get the right words to say.

“How can I trust you, Steve? How the hell can I trust you next time, that you won’t leave me? It's so hard to see you go, and for a second time, that's going to be hell.”

“Now could always be a good time to start,” Steve says so openly, just hoping that it's enough for Danny to accept it.  

Danny shakes his head, like it can clear his thought, and make this decision easier. "We can’t do this.”

“I know that we haven’t met each other for very long. And I think that if I ever had to think about it, I don't really think I'll ever regret you coming into my life."

"Steve..." Danny says his name again, like he can't really believe Steve's saying these things.

"I met this blonde, this very cute and handsome blonde man. He talks more with his hands then he does with his mouth, he’s feisty and passionate," Steve says, stopping to grab Danny's fingers, holding them and carding them through his. "He loves to cook because he loves making people happy, he's a giver,” Steve gets closer to Danny with each word. “And I know that he’s hating every second of this cliché movie induced speech, but I need him to listen because I just fucking can’t get him out of my mind. I know I screwed up by never talking to him, and running away like an idiot, but I needed time to think, really, a lot of time, to think this through, and now I'm done. He pauses his speech and looks directly into Danny's eyes. This,” Steve says pointing at the two of them, “is what I really want.” Steve’s finally in front of Danny, waiting for his answer with pleading eyes. “If you say you don’t want to see me after what I've said, then I’ll leave, and you’ll never see me again.”

Steve's being completely honest. But the biggest emotion is the feeling in his gut that he gets when Steve says he'll never see him again. He hadn't really been paying attention to the fact that he might never see Steve again. I mean sure he hasn't seen Steve in a while, but the thought of never seeing him again, it scares some deep part of Danny that he's never felt before.

"I do hate it."

Steve gives a muffled laugh as his eyes tear up a bit.

"But as much as I hate it; I don’t hate you saying them.”

Steve's finally close to him now that Danny lets him. "I'm sorry, for what I said before. I didn't mean them."

"Same goes for me." 

“So? Is that a yes?" Steve gives him an unsure glance, as he looks back at Danny.

Instead of replying he hugs Steve, harder. He hugs Steve with all his might, because, fuck, he’s missed the fucking goof so much. Danny holds tight. He needs this kind of physical reassurance, that Steve is really here, and that he’s really saying all these stupid things, and that it can’t be some cruel joke.

Arms suddenly drape over his shoulders in a hug thats finally being returned. Danny notices that Steve holds him just as strong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PS 
> 
> I just might write about them doing the doo later on in a chapter. 
> 
> or I might add on a sexish scene later to chapter 8...like a total dummy that can't decide on what to do. 
> 
> MAAH


End file.
